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In my brain there is a clever little monkey. It is a nice monkey, a smart monkey. He is very good at solving problems, that is, he is very good at coming up with different technical solutions to problems. This monkey thinks he is the best, he can solve everything and even if he couldn't solve the problem he still has a dozen of other solutions he wants to try.
I am a mathematician and this monkey is very useful.
He used to come with me during training as well, but he no longer is allowed to come. He wants to and if I let my attention slip he joins me during training instantly.
In my brain there is also an observer. My monkey thinks he is a boring annoying fellow. Doesn't do much it seems and certainly isn't working on solutions to problems like the monkey is. Monkey wants the attention and will at any moment try to push the observer away.
The monkey does stuff. Monkey does this to uke and does that to uke, cause once you have done this to uke you can do that other thing that the monkey came up with do to uke.
The observer observes. He sees what is going on. He has no fancy tricks, no quick solutions. He watches and can direct me to move with what he sees/feels. The observer wants to move with the intention, to move with the flow, to move with the union. He watches to see how ma doesn't change. He simply watches to see what begun end.
I know this. My observer is replacing my monkey ever more often. I know it is true, but if I read it it sounds like the musing of a madman. I am sure it is true and I am so grateful Alan Ruddock Sensei took the time again and again to explain it. The world of man is manifested through your hands.
And now? How do you make people see that wanting to do something is entirely different from doing what happens? I am lost.
Erik doesn't matter.