Aikido Light Bulb Jokes...

I posted this over at Aikido Journal's board, but thought it might be appreciated here too:

Q: How many aikido shodan does it take to change a light bulb?

A: Just one, he holds the bulb and the world revolves around him.

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Q: How many aikidoka with 3rd kyu rank does it take to change a light bulb?

A: How do you take the ukemi for that?

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Q: How many west coast aikidoka does it take to screw in a light bulb?

A: They screw in hot tubs, not light bulbs.

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Q: How many east coast aikidoka does it take to screw in a light bulb?

A: That's not really one of our kihon waza...

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Q: How many Aikiweb bulletin board members does it take to change a light bulb?

Twenty-eight.

Six to argue the various merits of different styles of aikido light bulb changing.

Six to weigh in with stories of what it was like to change light bulbs in their dojos in the '70s under various direct students of O'Sensei.

Three to quote O'Sensei on the nature of light bulb changing.

Four more to argue over those quotes.

One to post a video clip (stolen from an Aiki News tape) of O'Sensei changing a light bulb.

One newbie to ask about the effectiveness of light bulb changing technique outside the dojo.

One to ask why there are no light bulb changing competitions.

Five to try to be clever by making jokes about being "enlightened."

One to ask how to take the ukemi for that.

Thanks, Drew! I was having a day, and this was a great boost.

sharon

You forgot one...

It takes 21 Aikido practitioners to change a light bulb.

One to change the light bulb, and 20 other to say, "That was good, but my sensei does it a bit differently."

The EXACT same jokes are always told about tai chi. See, Chinese and Japanese martial arts ARE the same !

Q: How many "Aikido light bulb jokes" does it take to drive one mad ?

A: NO one knows !!!(*&$ AHAHAHAHAH LOOK A PINK ELEPHANT !!! I KILL YOU ALL !!!!!I#$*&

Q. How many Aikidoka does it take to change a light bulb?
A. Three - one to change the lightbulb and two ukes to make him look really good at it!!

Drew Ames wrote: Q: How many aikidoka with 3rd kyu rank does it take to change a light bulb? A: How do you take the ukemi for that?

Hey! I resemble that!

And I'm only a 4th kyu, for at least another month or two. I must be precocious.

Q: How many Aikiweb bulletin board members does it take to change a light bulb?

Twenty-eight.

Six to argue the various merits of different styles of aikido light bulb changing.

Six to weigh in with stories of what it was like to change light bulbs in their dojos in the '70s under various direct students of O'Sensei.

Three to quote O'Sensei on the nature of light bulb changing.

Four more to argue over those quotes.

One to post a video clip (stolen from an Aiki News tape) of O'Sensei changing a light bulb.

One newbie to ask about the effectiveness of light bulb changing technique outside the dojo.

One to ask why there are no light bulb changing competitions.

Five to try to be clever by making jokes about being "enlightened."

One to ask how to take the ukemi for that.[/quote]


That just made my whole day!!!

*grin*

Glad you enjoyed them.

I can't remember where I saw this but:

One Aikidoka can screw in many light bulbs at once as long as it is a big circular motion.

Q: "How many Aikidoka does it take to screw in a lightbulb?"

A: "Oh come on folks. I thought the answer would be obvious -- two!


practicing alone, presumably with a jo or bokken, was probably how that lightbulb was put out in the first place. All other Aikido practice takes two... Unless the bulb is supposed to be uke, or maybe nage... Or why replace it at all? Just hold the bulb in the fist and use ki-energy to light it! Or do you even need a bulb for that?

Q: How many Aikidokas does it take to change a lightbulb ?

A: It takes one person, and their affiliation with Aikido or lack thereof is completely irrelevant to the question.

Ladies and gentlemen, this is called an anti-joke.
Thank you, I'll be here till Thursday, try the veal.

Q: How many Aleksey S's does it take to tell a joke?

A: Zero..


Sorry, Aleksey... I couldn't resist.

[quote=Tim Barford]Q: "How many Aikidoka does it take to screw in a lightbulb?"

A: "Oh come on folks. I thought the answer would be obvious -- two![quote]

The hard part is getting them in there

Bronson

Q: How many Senseis does it take to change a lightbulb ?

A: One , trying to convince the bulb that change comes from within !

Drew Ames wrote: Q: How many Aikiweb bulletin board members does it take to change a light bulb? Twenty-eight. Six to argue the various merits of different styles of aikido light bulb changing. Six to weigh in with stories of what it was like to change light bulbs in their dojos in the '70s under various direct students of O'Sensei. Three to quote O'Sensei on the nature of light bulb changing. Four more to argue over those quotes. One to post a video clip (stolen from an Aiki News tape) of O'Sensei changing a light bulb. One newbie to ask about the effectiveness of light bulb changing technique outside the dojo. One to ask why there are no light bulb changing competitions. Five to try to be clever by making jokes about being "enlightened." One to ask how to take the ukemi for that.

LOL! But then it hit me .... who changes the light bulb!?

Bumped for the entertainment of my fellow Aikiweb members, and because I have no life.

But who changed the light bulb?