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-   -   Aikido Light Bulb Jokes... (http://www.aikiweb.com/forums/showthread.php?t=4307)

jxa127 08-29-2003 09:36 AM

Aikido Light Bulb Jokes...
 
I posted this over at Aikido Journal's board, but thought it might be appreciated here too:

Q: How many aikido shodan does it take to change a light bulb?

A: Just one, he holds the bulb and the world revolves around him.

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Q: How many aikidoka with 3rd kyu rank does it take to change a light bulb?

A: How do you take the ukemi for that?

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Q: How many west coast aikidoka does it take to screw in a light bulb?

A: They screw in hot tubs, not light bulbs.

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Q: How many east coast aikidoka does it take to screw in a light bulb?

A: That's not really one of our kihon waza...

-------------

Q: How many Aikiweb bulletin board members does it take to change a light bulb?

Twenty-eight.

Six to argue the various merits of different styles of aikido light bulb changing.

Six to weigh in with stories of what it was like to change light bulbs in their dojos in the '70s under various direct students of O'Sensei.

Three to quote O'Sensei on the nature of light bulb changing.

Four more to argue over those quotes.

One to post a video clip (stolen from an Aiki News tape) of O'Sensei changing a light bulb.

One newbie to ask about the effectiveness of light bulb changing technique outside the dojo.

One to ask why there are no light bulb changing competitions.

Five to try to be clever by making jokes about being "enlightened."

One to ask how to take the ukemi for that.

Sharon Seymour 08-29-2003 10:47 AM

Thanks, Drew! I was having a day, and this was a great boost.

sharon

Thalib 08-29-2003 11:53 AM

You forgot one...

It takes 21 Aikido practitioners to change a light bulb.

One to change the light bulb, and 20 other to say, "That was good, but my sensei does it a bit differently."

Lyle Bogin 08-29-2003 11:59 AM

The EXACT same jokes are always told about tai chi. See, Chinese and Japanese martial arts ARE the same ;)!

shihonage 08-29-2003 01:20 PM

Q: How many "Aikido light bulb jokes" does it take to drive one mad ?

A: NO one knows !!!(*&$ AHAHAHAHAH LOOK A PINK ELEPHANT !!! I KILL YOU ALL !!!!!I#$*&

Simon Ford-Powell 06-11-2004 07:48 AM

Re: Aikido Light Bulb Jokes...
 
Q. How many Aikidoka does it take to change a light bulb?
A. Three - one to change the lightbulb and two ukes to make him look really good at it!!

Karen Wolek 06-11-2004 10:38 AM

Re: Aikido Light Bulb Jokes...
 
Quote:

Drew Ames wrote:
Q: How many aikidoka with 3rd kyu rank does it take to change a light bulb?

A: How do you take the ukemi for that?

Hey! I resemble that! :)

And I'm only a 4th kyu, for at least another month or two. I must be precocious. :D

TexV2 06-11-2004 10:48 AM

Re: Aikido Light Bulb Jokes...
 
Q: How many Aikiweb bulletin board members does it take to change a light bulb?

Twenty-eight.

Six to argue the various merits of different styles of aikido light bulb changing.

Six to weigh in with stories of what it was like to change light bulbs in their dojos in the '70s under various direct students of O'Sensei.

Three to quote O'Sensei on the nature of light bulb changing.

Four more to argue over those quotes.

One to post a video clip (stolen from an Aiki News tape) of O'Sensei changing a light bulb.

One newbie to ask about the effectiveness of light bulb changing technique outside the dojo.

One to ask why there are no light bulb changing competitions.

Five to try to be clever by making jokes about being "enlightened."

One to ask how to take the ukemi for that.[/quote]


That just made my whole day!!! :D

jxa127 06-11-2004 11:50 AM

Re: Aikido Light Bulb Jokes...
 
*grin*

Glad you enjoyed them.

taras 06-14-2004 11:02 AM

Re: Aikido Light Bulb Jokes...
 
I can't remember where I saw this but:

One Aikidoka can screw in many light bulbs at once as long as it is a big circular motion.

aikitim23 06-14-2004 12:52 PM

Re: Aikido Light Bulb Jokes...
 
Q: "How many Aikidoka does it take to screw in a lightbulb?"

A: "Oh come on folks. I thought the answer would be obvious -- two!


practicing alone, presumably with a jo or bokken, was probably how that lightbulb was put out in the first place. All other Aikido practice takes two... Unless the bulb is supposed to be uke, or maybe nage... Or why replace it at all? Just hold the bulb in the fist and use ki-energy to light it! Or do you even need a bulb for that?

shihonage 06-14-2004 02:04 PM

Re: Aikido Light Bulb Jokes...
 
Q: How many Aikidokas does it take to change a lightbulb ?

A: It takes one person, and their affiliation with Aikido or lack thereof is completely irrelevant to the question.

Ladies and gentlemen, this is called an anti-joke.
Thank you, I'll be here till Thursday, try the veal.

John Boswell 06-14-2004 02:20 PM

Re: Aikido Light Bulb Jokes...
 
Q: How many Aleksey Sundeyev's does it take to tell a joke?

A: Zero.. :D


Sorry, Aleksey... I couldn't resist. ;)

Bronson 06-14-2004 02:40 PM

Re: Aikido Light Bulb Jokes...
 
[quote=Tim Barford]Q: "How many Aikidoka does it take to screw in a lightbulb?"

A: "Oh come on folks. I thought the answer would be obvious -- two![quote]

The hard part is getting them in there :D

Bronson

ChristianBoddum 06-14-2004 03:47 PM

Re: Aikido Light Bulb Jokes...
 
Q: How many Senseis does it take to change a lightbulb ?

A: One , trying to convince the bulb that change comes from within !

CNYMike 07-27-2004 10:22 PM

Re: Aikido Light Bulb Jokes...
 
Quote:

Drew Ames wrote:
Q: How many Aikiweb bulletin board members does it take to change a light bulb?

Twenty-eight.

Six to argue the various merits of different styles of aikido light bulb changing.

Six to weigh in with stories of what it was like to change light bulbs in their dojos in the '70s under various direct students of O'Sensei.

Three to quote O'Sensei on the nature of light bulb changing.

Four more to argue over those quotes.

One to post a video clip (stolen from an Aiki News tape) of O'Sensei changing a light bulb.

One newbie to ask about the effectiveness of light bulb changing technique outside the dojo.

One to ask why there are no light bulb changing competitions.

Five to try to be clever by making jokes about being "enlightened."

One to ask how to take the ukemi for that.

LOL! But then it hit me .... who changes the light bulb!? :p :)

CNYMike 07-22-2006 10:46 PM

Re: Aikido Light Bulb Jokes...
 
Bumped for the entertainment of my fellow Aikiweb members, and because I have no life.

But who changed the light bulb?


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