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So tonight my wonderful Sensei did me a favor. He allowed me to test for 2nd kyu. This is a favor because I am going to miss the regular scheduled testing coming up at the end of September.
I would love to say that I aced it with no issues or mistakes but then I would be lying. The testing was a the end of class and I don't know if I was just tired but my brain was so scrambled I felt like I could not remember a thing. I second guessed all my moves. I would start the move correctly but in the middle of it my brain would turn on and I would stop and restart again. I didn't feel good through out the whole testing. I don't know if I was just succumbing under internal pressure because I knew that it was such a special thing that Sensei was doing for me by breaking protocal and allowing me to test early.
I don't know if I passed. Really.
Before testing he told me that he wouldn't have the certificates ready until the main testing date. After testing he didn't say anything to me that lead me to think that I passed. I had "too much mind" going on.