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In General
A Change in Attitude
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#251
 09-22-2009 03:21 PM |
By early September, we had only been going at test-specific training for about a week when I thought I'd finally had it. I was already sick of it and ready to throw in the towel - Shodan test be damned. So tired of dogging the test stuff, I just wanted to either get back to regular practice or quit entirely.
Whether it was: that recovery from months of overtraining was so slow going; that my allergies seemed to be reaching an almost unbearable peak, triggering not only my asthma but cold-like symptoms; that frustrations about my own technique seemed only to pile up higher and higher until I was telling myself I was nowhere near where I needed to be by Shodan, with the deadline looming above me ever closer…whatever the heck it was, I thought for certain that I was through.
But frustration can only go so far in and of itself. It is, by its nature, a catalyst. That is - whether you like it or not - something's gotta give.
I debated (and still am torn on) whether or not to name this post "The Seven-Year Itch". That I've been practicing Aikido consistently for almost seven years now is more coincidence than anything else. Through the years, I'd given up a great many things in order to train regularly: voluntary and educational opportunities, familial and social events, even the possibility for deeper friendships, when you think about it. Yet I never did so with any form of regret. I'd always known there would have to be some sacrifice in order to attain the level of
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Views: 327
| Comments: 1
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In General
Summertime Blues
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#250
08-06-2009 08:58 PM |
It's that time of year again. But I don't think it ever got quite this bad back when we had our own permanent dojo space. Summer really sucks the life out of training, or so it would seem...moreso these days.
OVERTRAINING
It hasn't helped that for a large part of the late spring-early summer I found myself suffering from a number of symptoms of overtraining: headaches, insomnia, decreased immunity, even a decrease in enthusiasm for training (if that can be believed). It ended up being a vicious cycle, really, that I'm now certain was caused by lack of sleep and trying to maintain a demanding training regimen without enough recovery time. But I digress.
Since this post is primarily a rant I will at the very least take the time to say a couple of positive observations about training lately, which is that I've been transitioning more and more from learning technique primarily through seeing towards understanding the principles behind it by learning through feeling. I know it sounds really wishy-washy and esoteric, but it has to do with feeling the energy of an attack and understanding where it's going (thereby knowing what to do with it). It's meant that I've been doing a lot more to catch timing and blend - but making a point of moving with an attack earlier on that I originally would have...as a result the connections have been feeling much smoother. Being Sensei's primary demo uke over the summer while others have been away has meant that in a way I've had n
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Views: 314
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In General
Moving Beyond Kihon
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#238
11-15-2008 02:09 AM |
Takumusu Aiki: 武産合気 - A "slogan" of the founder's meaning "infinitely generative martial art of aiki." Thus, a synonym for aikido. The scope of aikido is not limited only to the standard, named techniques one studies regularly in practice. Rather, these standard techniques serve as repositories of more fundamental principles (kihon). Once one has internalized the kihon, it is possible to generate a virtually infinite variety of new aikido techniques in accordance with novel conditions. (Definition is courtesy of AikiWeb's wonderfully comprehensive Wiki :-)
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I like to think that --- thanks to muscle memory and a great deal of persistence --- much of the fundamental principles of any art become internalized over time via the dogged repetition of action and technique. As with many things, it certainly sounds simple enough. When asked by Sensei at the end of class if they had any questions, my past sempai years ago would often say, "More practice, Sensei!" It became a kind of mantra (along with "This ain't knitting class" and "Suck it up").
How true it is. Yet when asked by Sensei at the end of class, "Any questions?" my own oft-repeated response now as a senior student myself is usually, "Always, Sensei." No matter how much you practice, they're always there.
While we all know that most people learn by doing and there is more value to be gained on the mats from action rather than words (ie. "Less chatter, more splatter" a
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Views: 540
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In General
The Teacher's Mind and the Student's Mind
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#233
06-15-2008 11:14 PM |
...or should I say: "Sensei-shin" and "Deshi-shin"? 
Sensei will occasionally troubleshoot a fellow-student's technique by asking me to demonstrate it for them on his behalf. I find this at times a somewhat dubious honour --- dubious only in that I am not yet at the place where I can always explain what it is I am doing correctly in contrast with what the other student is doing differently.
Case in point: Yesterday afternoon, Jeremy, Lisa and I were practicing test techniques and during one of Lisa's turns as nage, Sensei told her, "No, that's not right," and asked me to show her how I do it. I did the technique as best as I knew it and at the end Sensei said, "That's correct, but can you explain to Lisa what was wrong?" At which point, I could not, so Sensei continued to clarify for us.
It was then that I realized clearly for the first time that I have been and continue to view techniques from a completely "student" perspective. Never have I, while watching either Lisa, nor any other student, been able to pick up on errors in movement or timing that weren't obvious ones. Subtle discrepancies in technique are still quite beyond me. I find myself viewing other students with what I can only describe as a passively observant mind --- one which sees without, for the most part, a critical judgment towards what they are seeing. When I view Sensei, Kawahara Shihan or any other Yudansha practitioner performing technique, my mind towards what I see changes int
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Views: 1003
| Comments: 3
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In General
Rootedness on Unstable Ground...in Life
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#232
03-30-2008 02:58 PM |
I like to think that a person's truly defining moments are found in how they handle adversity. You can either sink or swim. You can rise to the occasion, face the challenge head-on or concede defeat. Either way we choose, the process shapes us. And it's always nice to see in times like this that you're not alone.
For the past eight to nine months our dojo has gone through a huge transition. The space it has occupied for 15 years was to be demolished, leaving us without a place to practice. Last Summer was spent holding practices in the park and despite having many merits in and of itself (I found the challenge of fighting not only my own allergies but the inconsistency of environment inherent in simply being outside in various kinds of weather a valuable and eye-opening experience), it just doesn't replace traditional waza on the mats. As the saying goes, "It's a nice place to visit, I just wouldn't want to live there."
And boy, did I miss doing ukemi. Though this feeling changed somewhat --- at least for a short time --- as soon as we did find a temporary space and were able to get new mats. Forty-two, bea-uuuu-tiful brand-spanking new Zebra tatami-style mats. Hard. Tatami. Mats. Yowch. In short order, I realized just how spoiled we were with the cushy foam and fuschia vinyl deal we had at the old dojo. Really, really spoiled. But soon enough, we started getting used to them. They're what you'd call "fast" mats...though this was not necessarily a go
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Views: 2011
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In General
For Love of the Dance...
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#231
08-02-2007 05:10 PM |
Last Saturday marked my fourth public demonstration of randori so far. In some ways, it feels the same and yet quite different: I'm no longer nervous like I was the very first time; I've done the same movements enough times over that it feels like second nature --- at least the sabaki/strategy of it feels like I could do it in my sleep. Yet I've found myself, in retrospect, with a greater awareness of my body: a better sense of when things flow right and when they feel forced. Thankfully, it is a moving chess match --- dynamic, not static --- such that one can adapt one's sabaki on the fly in order to put yourself in a position to better "complete the circle"/blend and flow. Still, I would say that only 25% of the time, it's good flow --- the other 75% of the time it feels contrived. Let me tell you, though, that scant 25% always feels divine, effortless. Truly, it's like you're dancing on air --- as for the other 75%: there's always tomorrow, and the mats will always be there welcoming more practice. Or so we hope.
My one saving grace of course is that the audience never seems to notice that which I so very obviously feel in my movement. Sensei asked me afterwards how I feel after hearing so much praise for my performance at the demo. Honestly? I said --- it doesn't matter. They see just a few minutes, a mere snapshot of me --- the seemingly finely-honed end result of what ultimately becomes years of training, innumerable bruises, injuries, blood, sweat and tears. They
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Views: 673
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In General
05/12/2007: SK Seminar with Kawahara Sensei
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#228
05-17-2007 03:14 PM |
Pre-Seminar Nutrition Log: 05/07-05/11
- 15g Creatine/day (in morning fruit shakes) for the 5 days prior
- baked banana loaf for road trip (included oats, hemp seed)
- AM of seminar/"pre-event meal": good variety fruits, bran muffin, yogurt, omelet w/veggies, apple juice, green tea, 1% milk, the usual vitamin supplements
- Midday lunch break: focused on low-GI carbs (dried apricots, brazil nuts, apple, orange, pineapple juice), extra multi-vitamin and lots of water, of course
Energy Levels: (Not so surprisingly) very good! By the end, I felt like I could go a lot longer still. 
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After having missed the last seminar in the Fall due to my concussion (since recovered, with little residual effects thank-you!) I was rarin' to go. I wasn't disappointed.
Kawahara sensei, despite looking like he had lost a considerable amount of weight, was in good spirits. From an instructor's standpoint he may have seemed negative --- he had a number of disparaging things to say regarding instructors being far too egotistical, not practicing enough, and essentially blaming them for the poor performance of their students --- comments I was told afterwards which were meant more in a cautionary sense. One wonders, naturally, what more was "lost in translation". 
Kawahara also made no small point that he felt that a number of his students in both Japan and Canada were "wasting their money" with Aikido by not pushing themselves to train harder. Personally, (
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Views: 714
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In General
05/10/07 - On Raising the Bar
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#226
05-14-2007 11:25 PM |
...for myself, that is. [AikiWeb ate my journal entry!  This was a post from last Thursday which, after slaving over it for a goodly amount of time, I lost when AikiWeb logged me out (I guess I took too long). I'm going to do my best to replicate what was originally written as much as possible. Consider this a word to the wise for my fellow AikiWeb bloggers: ALWAYS save your longer entries in another word processing program (ie. even Notepad will do) before submitting it, just in case, because you won't get it back if it doesn't submit properly. I used to be in the habit of doing this frequently (been burned in the past) but the one time (last Thursday)I decided to forego it, guess what happened?  ]
So, some time ago I finished reading "Strength and Power Training for Martial Arts" by Martina Sprague --- ultimately, I found it a great overview of many easily-applicable conditioning techniques for all martial artists and as a result have been bringing some of the more overlooked concepts (ie. resistance training for the neck, plyometrics and bodyweight exercises) which the original strength training program designed specifically for me did not include. I think the only thing missing from Sprague's book was balance exercises --- something I've incorporated at the advice of a physiotherapist in the context of an old ankle injury --- which one would think invaluable to any martial artist. Otherwise, I felt it was a good general book regarding the benefits and application of conditioning principles specifically for MAs. As a complement, I highly recommend (and may have mentioned in the past) "Strength Training Anatomy" by Frederic Delavier for a more detailed graphical representation of weight training techniques (including descriptions of proper form, images of variations, and information on common injuries and how to prevent them).
Recently, I also finished reading "The Fighter's Body: An Owner's Manual - Your Guide to Diet, Nutrition, Exercise and Excellence in the Martial Arts" by Loren W. Christensen and Wim Demeere and found it extremely informative (though a lot of the more basic information was already known to me, I liked that a gr
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Views: 3908
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In General
Leading (in more ways than one)
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#222
01-24-2007 10:33 AM |
I have extremely high standards. I guess I don't need to say this to those of you who know me well and/or have practiced with me. I take my training seriously --- far too seriously to some. Each night on the mats is a constant struggle --- a duel to the death --- if you will, between who I am and who I want to be.
I know it may sound overly dramatic, but there is a duality at work here that (when I stop to think about it) you can't really avoid in an art such as Aikido. There is the me that is the practitioner: the woman whose Aikido is made up of mere physical movements that have come about based upon her own individual physiology, skills and experience. Right now, this woman is currently trying to delve beyond the physical aspects of the art that are seemingly visible to the eye. Gone are the days of figuring out what to move. *How* to move concerns her more now. She is experimenting with timing, extension, alignment --- essentially, the aspect of leading --- and how these all influence kuzushi (or lack thereof, in her case).
There is also the me that is exemplified by the quality of my character. She is a woman who strives to be the very best role model she can be for not only the other female practitioners in the dojo, but for any and all who wish to see value in what she does both on and off the mats. She takes her role as senior student extremely seriously. She also wishes others took her, as a practitioner, seriously. She wonders what it will take.
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Views: 438
| Comments: 1
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In General
New Year's Day Shugyo 2007
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#221
01-02-2007 12:59 PM |
I'd like to say that I miss writing in this journal, but I don't. "Less chatter, more splatter," --- as one of the guys has said --- pretty well sums up my year. I'd like to think I'm all the better for it. Some people seem to have more words than days of practice under their belts...thankfully, I'm not one of them. You'll soon see why. For this also sums up last night's annual Shugyo.
It's been almost a month now without a single post-concussive symptom (aside from the time we did a warmup with very small, tight rolls) and I'm back to regular ukemi. It's absolutely heavenly. Only very rarely now will fast pivoting make me dizzy. Just in time, it would seem.
Last night was poorly attended, and I'm rather disappointed. I know Sensei was. One other senior student was conspiciously absent from what is considered an important dojo tradition and an experience that one gets only very rarely in this day and age. Thankfully, Jeremy, Garry (after having to deal with a flat tire), Matt and Jarod were able to make it...I wish more folks were.
The challenge was to (with no talking or pausing for breaks or adjustments) continually throw and take ukemi for at least an hour (for me and others who started early, it was an an hour and 15 minutes) without stopping, switching roles every 5 minutes and techniques every 20. The techniques were three different kinds of Kokyunage, and it became apparent right away how important it was to continually apply the five fundamental
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Views: 388
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