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There is no point in destroying your uke because then you will no longer have a training partner.
How to Do a Hip Throw (o-goshi) by eHow.com
"So I said can you show us some hip throws?
And he said no, but I can show you some cool pins..."
Koshinage is the name used for all hip throws in aikido. In judo hip throws - koshi waza - are a category of throws.
In aikido there are two basic types of koshinage.
old-style koshinage
In the first type of koshinage at the instant of the throw the uke is at ninety degrees to tori. There is not really a comparable throw in modern judo but the equivalent right-angle body position appears in kataguruma (uke is loaded onto tori's shoulders rather than the waist).
Tori breaks uke's balance and then rolls uke approximately over the line of the belt off to the side. The hip movement in this throw is much less pronounced. This throw is the traditional aikido koshinage and O Sensei can be seen doing it in old photos and film. The older generation of Aikikai teachers sometimes used this technique. For example Sadateru Arikawa Sensei did this version.
judo-style koshinage
In the second type of koshinage uke is behind tori at the moment of the throw. Tori breaks uke's balance and with a sharp twisting hip movement - almost a flick - throws uke directly to the front.
history of koshinage
This second judo-style koshinage has some disadvantages for real self-defence because for an instant you turn your back on uke. So the technique has to be perfect with no weak points - accurately breaking uke's balance. That is probably why this style was not incorporated into aikido originally.
I was at a seminar in Tokyo some years ago with Shoji Nishio Sensei. He said clearly that because of his background in judo he had personally introduced most of the koshinage into aikido. So he was talking about the second judo-style koshinage.
It's true that teachers who have some experience in judo have very powerful koshinage. For example I remember Seiichi Sugano Sensei had a great koshinage. Also Kenji Shimizu Sensei of Tendoryu Aikido has a very dynamic koshinage.
koshinage in aikido today
Some dojos teach koshinage as a normal aikido technique. But it's also true that in many dojos in Japan koshinage is not really thought of as aikido and so it is not included in training at all. At the Aikikai hombu dojo there are only a few teachers who teach it regularly.
So the result of all this is that for a lot of people koshinage has become a little bit intimidating.
On the other side people who have done judo wonder what all the fuss is about. Ogoshi - a simple hip throw with tori's arm wrapped around uke's waist is one of the very first techniques taught in judo. In the Kodokan in Tokyo it is taught to beginners after about one month of learning ukemi and the basics of judo.
So if a white belt can do a hip throw after one month why are even some experienced aikidoka intimidated by koshinage?
ukemi
One big reason is the ukemi.
In judo ukemi are - mostly - in a down direction.
In aikido mae ukemi are - mostly - in a forward direction. That's what mae means. That's why most aikido dojos teach a mae ukemi with the leg bent. That allows you to get into an attacking position facing any direction. In judo both legs are kept fairly straight in mae mawari ukemi and some of the impact is absorbed by striking the tatami with your feet. So a judo ukemi is kinder on the body for hard throws, especially for beginners.
Related to that is that in a traditional judo dojo the tatami is sprung. One person walking across a dojo can create vibrations at the other side of the dojo. The sprung tatami mats are excellent for absorbing judo throws which are often uke plus tori hitting the ground together. Aikido dojo mats are traditionally much harder. Hard mats are safer because it's not so easy to twist your ankle. They are much better for rolls too. In aikido the uke rolls away from danger and is ready to attack again immediately. In judo the throw is the end of the technique.
In the end it's not rocket science. If you do the ukemi from koshi nage after every training it's going to feel comfortable in a few months. If you do the ukemi from koshi nage every few months it's going to take a long, long time to improve. Crash mats can help beginners to overcome the fear but in the end like most things in aikido it comes down to practice. Then more practice. And then more practice.
the throw
Keep your feet, knees and legs parallel. Your feet should be like the number eleven. Your legs should look like a downhill skier's. It's very dangerous to let your knees splay out - uke might hit one on the way down.
Break uke's balance! Lower your hips well below uke's hips. Get good tight contact with uke. All basic points. As you twist uke over your hips raise them sharply by partly straightening your legs to get a dynamic throw.
There are a few things in aikido which are open to criticism from other budo. For example I'll talk about sword work another time. But koshinage is one. If your dojo doesn't do koshinage that's fine - it's not absolutely necessary in aikido. But if you do it don't do it half-heartedly. I don't want to accept that a judo white belt can do a more effective hip throw than an aikido yudansha. Neither should you.
By chance this same shot was captured on video here: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PZNzQpinzbY
Check it out - keeping in mind that Joe's opponent is doing his best not to be thrown while doing his best to throw him. Joe gets it done though! So in aikido keiko without the resistance and blocking from the uke this should be a piece of cake. Right? So koshinage is not a big deal.