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I have heard complaints in the past, in this and other forums, of Nage's being too rough on their uke's. Now I'm sure they are ligitimate complaints, especially if the nage is trying to muscle through the technique. I wonder though how much of it is due to the lack of proper ukemi to help protect against a firm technique. For eg. In Ikkyo I have been brought down to my knee on the spot by a nage rather than walking me down. This in itself is alright with me because I was told the proper ukemi for the technique which allows me to prepare for this downward pressure that puts me straight down to my knee, and or stomach. If I wasn't told the proper ukemi I could try to walk forward to my knee causing more torque on my elbow or shoulder which could damage to same.
As for nage, he's just trying to do the technique as he would apply it in a real situation. If we as uke's can't drop properly to protect ourselves so that nage is following uke around till we get to our knees, then we are not doing our nage's any good, because nage is not getting the feel for the intent or Ki with which to do the technique.
I'm not saying that nage should just complete the technique uncaring of uke. I'm saying that the nage needs to know wheather uke is capable of proper ukemi for the given technique. Thus the learning process extends to both nage and uke, and each is benefiting from practicing the "proper technique".
If nage is preforming technique without muscleing through it he/she should be able to feel the tell tale resistance of poor ukemi technique. At this point nage should be able to hold the uke with Ki, or intent, till the uke adjusts or assistance is verbalized on how to continue with ukemi.
Now I'm no expert by any means, but I take my ukemi very seriously because I want to protect myself to the best of my ability so I will always be able to train. If I see a new throw that gets me in an unusual fall I would like to know how to fall properly. Not only to protect myself but to allow nage to practice the technique properly.