Being aware that we have isms is what sets those of us who want to improve our social deemenor apart from those who just want to learn a martial art. IE poeple who say they are perfect, and the others who say no one is perfect, but can improve on themselves none the less. From the few post I've seen you, and I for that matter, are the latter. Hope your new Chair Person doesn't give you all to much of a hard time. Kelly

[[[allright, this made sense when I typed it. That happened to be about 15 minutes after I woke up]]] I agree that behavior amongst similar experiences manifests similarly (mostly). We have a new department chair who hails from New York and enjoys (forgive the crude term) 'ball-busting' but he hasn't gotten that Californians generally don't make that a constant habit. <<So in his environment, this was okay, and he's a little confused about this not taking so well in his new environment.>> As for mal/well-adjustment: I guess I assume that even though we all have some level of dysfunction in our upbringing that we all are trying to get beyond it. I, probably unfairly, assume that aikidoka live a more conscious life. I can't say that I am fully conscious of all my -isms but I am working on it, and I generally think that all aikidoka are like my local fellow aikidoka. FWIW

Mine too! No one is perfect, especially me. I do try to set an example for my kids to follow though, and through that exsample they are growing into some pretty amazing kids. Interestingly enough though, the examples I set for my kids are also noticed by their friends, and even some of mine, which in turn causes me to see changes in them. It is a hard thing to describe or explain so I hope this isn't coming accross too self rightous. I guess the best way to explain it is to look at the behaviour of people from a disfunctional family and compare that to the beaviour of people from a well adjusted family. The behaviours of the individuals have many similarities in their respective groups because they were examples to one another. Happy New Year to you and yours. Kelly

Well, we often set O'sensei aloft to the level of Buddha/Jesus/Mohammed so no worries about the biblical stuff. I don't know about the example thing for myself. What I mean to say is that I try to live in the best manner that I can for me, as I can't ask of anyone else for that which I require if I am not willing to put the same forth. You're right though; being disharmonious and practicing the way of harmony seems inconsistent. I think though that many different people have different ideas or investments in aikido. There are people out there who are more invested in how to dominate in an altercation than how to ameliorate in mind body and spirit. There is a resistance to the cognitive end for sure, and it (that resistance) seems to be related to those who oppose things out of lifestyle. What I mean to say is that those who have a habit of being splitters rather than joiners are more likely to resist the mind-set of many aikidoka. The funny thing is that I tend to be a non-joiner, but aikido and it's philosophy really speaks to me. I am not perfect, and am not in a constant state of aiki, but it really has altered the course of my life. FWIW

At the risk of sounding overly biblical, Jesus taught his decsiples by being an example. He also taught them to have faith that their example was the best way to spread the gosple. We also should be an example for Aikido, otherwise the people who we are telling how great our art of Aikido is will think were full of shit, and sluff us off. Kelly

Thanks Kelly, I guess it will fall only on the ears of the choir (to warp two aphorisms). I think that randori is good, but it is best to be in mutual agreement about such activity. Randomly approaching a stranger and giving them a knife-hand in the throat might be considered rude in areas other than your local dojo, even then it might be good to say 'Hey, mind if I try my knife-hand technique?' then wait for consent. I guess I'm a little saddened that the thread was deleted only because it seems to be an unfinished discussion, or rather it seems that there were two monologues going on at once rather than a dialogue. Sometimes after a few misunderstandings flung back and forth, the conclusion jumping subsides. Now however, it's likely to rear its ugly head again and again only to be cut short and grow back perpetually. I guess I'm rambling now. Thanks though for the kind words.

That was eloquently put Jane. I have heard someone argue that that type of behaviour should be condoned because it, as you put it, serves as a type of verbal randori. But we have to deal with that every day as it is with people who don't study the art of peace. It is our duty to spread it by being an example to those who who don't understand, but see the change in our attitudes toward others for the better. Kelly