View Full Version : Time to Train with Arrival of New Baby
05-06-2004, 04:00 PM
I have always wanted to begin the study of aikido but always found an excuse not to. I am finally at a place, spiritually, where I am prepared to spend the emotional capital to do this right. However, I have also been blessed by having my first child born 4 months ago. My wife is supportive at my request to begin training, but I cannot help but ask if I am being selfish or is my wife being a saint. Should I wait to begin my training, knowing I will have limited time to do so, or is there "never a good time" and I should put as much time (reasonably) into it that I can. I would love for nothing more than for my son to grow up and model himself after his father - a person spiritually at peace as a competent aikidoka.
Thanks for reading.
05-06-2004, 06:20 PM
You don't need to blow off the family to train. On the other hand, you can't live 100% for the family and ignore yourself.
Find a compromise. If it doesn't work, adjust it. If it ultimately won't work at all, then you can drop it.
But you won't know till you try.
All I can add to what Greg said, is make sure that she has some time to get out and take a breather too. After all, everyone has to take a turn as uke :)
05-07-2004, 08:03 AM
I think you should definitely start Aikido - hopefully it will help refresh you for your family duties! But definitely make sure your wife gets something similar... is there something she's been wanting to do for a while that you could support her in? I suggest training at least 2 days a week in Aikido, especially as a beginner. It sounds like you have put a lot of thought into this decision, which is great, but be careful your expectations aren't too high. There will be a lot of frustration as well as a lot of joy. Especially with all your other responsibilities, I would suggest trying not to take Aikido TOO seriously. Just enjoy your training and save energy for your family.
Good luck and congrats on your new baby!
05-07-2004, 12:44 PM
I agree with the previous respondents. There's no time like the present to start aikido although as a new activity for you, you should make an effort to allow your wife to find an activity (new or old) for herself.
My wife and I have also welcomed a new baby girl (our second, born April 28) into our family. I am still managing to train at the early morning classes but evening classes are out. The time will come again where I can train three times per week.
Enjoy your son!
05-07-2004, 01:46 PM
Like many here, I have a 3-month old, and I scaled back my training from 3 to 2 nights a week. I would like to think only for the moment, but who knows.
My wife knows how important my training is for me (she is also an Aikidoka), and sometimes I feel guilty, but she does have her Yoga one night a week and my support any other evening she might need. The difficulty will arise when she wants to return to her training; that's where the grandparents come into the picture!
You are right though, there never really is a "good" time. There are perhaps less-worse times, and this sounds like it.
Congrats on the baby, and welcome to the wonderful world of Aikido.
05-07-2004, 02:30 PM
I agree with everyone here. If you wait until the right time to start Aikido, you may never get there. We have a 3 months old, and he is the cutest thing on this planet! I used to train 3 + times a week but have cut back to 2 times a week, which is fine. My wife supports my aikido activities and says she has noticed a change in me since I started (5 years ago). Through Aikido I have learned to be more patient with others as with myself. That is extremely important with Aikido and babies. You can learn so much in Aikido that you can pass long to your children like passion, spirit, and as I said patience, so get started now. You can practice aikido with your baby now. Try extending Ki with your baby. You'll find they can do it much better than you. Enjoy!
05-09-2004, 11:26 AM
I thank everyone for the support. I went to my first class on Friday night and enjoyed it immensely, though I do have one point I disagree with. "I" have the cutest kid on the planet! :p
"I" have the cutest kid on the planet! :p
You certainly do Jeff, but, personally, I'll keep my cutest kid on the planet. :D
05-10-2004, 10:34 PM
Wow! so you guys have seen my Grandson?!! :D
*cutest on my planet , anyway (except for my G-daughter *
05-10-2004, 11:59 PM
I'm in that same boat right now. My wife delivered my first on the 5th. Go and start training. They will be there after class. It is a good time to start training.
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