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felipe_3
06-12-2010, 10:51 PM
Hi my name is felipe I`m 17 years old, I have practicing aikido by 3months ago, I practice too alitle of kick boxing and jiu jitsu and iaido in the same 3 months.

my height is 1.88 meters

The past friday I had a problem with a bully, he practice kick boxing by 2 or 3 years ago and is stronger,faster in his movements than me.
He have 17 years ol too but he is smaller than me, he try to beat to me but he couldn`t and he now want fight with me, I don`t like the violence andhe study at the same high school that I, My friend tell me that I have to fight with him but I don`t know what I have to do , I have a little scared I had never fought with anybody, please can you give some advice??

mickeygelum
06-12-2010, 11:33 PM
Honestly, stand up for yourself.

mathewjgano
06-13-2010, 12:14 AM
It's hard to give advice for a situation we know nothing about, but I'd like to add that there's more than one way to stand up for yourself. Good luck.

Adam Huss
06-13-2010, 12:15 AM
Try to find out what his motivations are. I know its asking a bit much of people so young as your motivations are often emotionally based...but understanding this guy's reasoning can help. Maybe you are required to take a physical stance and ensure he know you aren't to be messed with...and maybe there is another way to go about it. Either is fine, as long as its appropriate. Try asking your parents about it...they will appreciate the honesty and might have good advice. Good luck bro,
V.R
A

dps
06-13-2010, 12:20 AM
When I was in 6th grade I had trouble with certain older kids bullying me.

So my dad ( boxed in the Navy and was Golden Gloves heavyweight champ in Canton, Ohio ) taught me how to box.

He told me don't start a fight, don't fight if you don't have to but if you have to, fight like hell..

Win if you can but if you don't win make sure the other guy doesn't want to fight you again.

My advice would be the same to you. Don't fight if you don't have to. If you have to fight, fight like hell. If you lose make sure the other guy regrets he fought you.



David

Buck
06-13-2010, 12:57 AM
Well I feel violence isn't the answer. There are times when you have no choice. But, those times are rare and uncommon for most people your age. That is unless your into crime, like gangs. Violent action results in humiliation, revenge, and more violence. You beat the guy he is humiliated, he wants revenge, that turns to more violence. He beats you, you want revenge and that turns to more violences. Or if you beat him he becomes humiliated, revengeful, and more violence. This cycles until someone becomes the other's beotch. This situation is based on your description of the issue.

Find a way to deescalate his momentum to fight. Like putting him off, avoid him until his motivation has waned to a point where his desire to fight is not strong enough to bother with you. Put him off until he cools off and until his desire and energy to fight has waned to a lull. Then attempt to befriend him. Find common interests, boost his ego, ware him down so he doesn't want to fight. Remember it is the mind that the body follows. Change the mind and the body will follow. You're both young and friendship is highly likely.

Abasan
06-13-2010, 01:42 AM
If you have to fight for something right, then fight with all your heart. But listen to your heart, when you feel its time to stop, then stop.

lbb
06-13-2010, 06:23 AM
What usually happens in your school when one student wants to fight another? Do they just have at it, and the school authorities stand back and say, "Boys will be boys"? I doubt that. How hard would it be to just say to this guy, "I don't want to get suspended" (or expelled, or whatever is likely to happen if you fight).

It's also worth thinking about how this situation came about. You mentioned that this guy is a "bully", but you also mentioned his martial arts backgrounds. Is it possible that you were comparing your experience with him? Here's some advice: don't talk about your martial arts training. Nothing brings out the jerk in some people like hearing that you train in martial arts. Don't talk about it, don't go around wearing martial arts t-shirts or badges, don't do anything to call attention to it. You may be hoping to get favorable attention that way, but you'll also get people who see it as a challenge or an invitation to throw down. Presumably, you didn't start training in order to brag and get into fights. The way to avoid these situations is to just keep a low profile.

Hellis
06-13-2010, 06:50 AM
Felipe
As always these situations are difficult to forsee.
Do not plan on any fancy techniques, let him come to you. If he is going to kick then you must be brave and enter when he is on one leg, you may get caught but you will also take him. No punches to the body just a good one in the nose, eyes run, finish him. If you don't then as with all bullies he will come back....
I have personally been there in the past.
My son ( MMA ) fought a 6th dan Taekwondo with a reputation of being lethal with his kicking power, I advised my son just as I have you. Do not allow your opponent to kick - See the result - all over at 46 seconds.
http://aikidoellisvideo.magnify.net/
Bottom row - Rik Ellis Aikido/MMA vs R Dennis 6th dan Taekwondo

Good luck
Henry Ellis
http://kyu-shin-do.blogspot.com/

dps
06-13-2010, 06:55 AM
Felipe is from Ecuador. Different culture, different school system from the culture and school system we have in America. It is not wise to give advise based on cultural bias.

He needs to make the decision that he is going to stand up for himself and not be bullied and that this decision might lead to a fight.

Should he try to talk to this person to avoid a fight, yes.

If he can avoid the fight then great.

Based on my experience, he needs to prepare for the worst case scenario and hope for the best case scenario and project this attitude to the other young man.

David

felipe_3
06-13-2010, 10:05 AM
thank you so much to all your comments, it will be very helpful, first I will try to talk with him and try to avoid thefight but I don`t know If he want fight I think that I have to, he train in my same dojo , we have the same sensei, he like to fight so much and is so agressive,I only wanted learn martials arts for defend to me in an assault and also for the martial arts philosophy.

Larry Feldman
06-13-2010, 10:18 AM
Does your Sensei condone using the skills he teaches to bully people? I would think not, perhaps he may be able to 'explain' how wrong that is to the class, when the bully is present.

Personally I would throw them out of class.

ChrisHein
06-13-2010, 10:56 AM
This is a great learning experience for both of you. Take it on. Face this kid who wants to fight you. If you don't want to fight him, tell him that. If he attacks you, defend yourself. In the end you will most likely end up as friends.

Take your life in hand, deal with your situations.

Mark Uttech
06-13-2010, 12:50 PM
Onegaishimasu, you say that you and the bully have the same sensei, and you come here for the answer? You should ask advice of your sensei.

In gassho,

Mark

sakumeikan
06-13-2010, 12:57 PM
Hi my name is felipe I`m 17 years old, I have practicing aikido by 3months ago, I practice too alitle of kick boxing and jiu jitsu and iaido in the same 3 months.

my height is 1.88 meters

The past friday I had a problem with a bully, he practice kick boxing by 2 or 3 years ago and is stronger,faster in his movements than me.
He have 17 years ol too but he is smaller than me, he try to beat to me but he couldn`t and he now want fight with me, I don`t like the violence andhe study at the same high school that I, My friend tell me that I have to fight with him but I don`t know what I have to do , I have a little scared I had never fought with anybody, please can you give some advice??

Hi Felipe,
If the guy decides to intimidate you if possible avoid conflict.
At the same time if the guy is determined to start a fight do not under any circumstances let him get the first punch in .If the guy is stupid enough to chance his arm , get the first attack in .See Mr Henry Ellis blog below.You need to be prepared to really go for it if all else fails.Do what is required,if you beat this guy he wont come back at you.He sounds a moron.Consider an attack on his
legs/knees.Since he is the bully , cut him down to size.

Keep calm , dont get scared.The guy needs a clip on the chin perhaps?Good luck, Joe.

sakumeikan
06-13-2010, 01:08 PM
Try to find out what his motivations are. I know its asking a bit much of people so young as your motivations are often emotionally based...but understanding this guy's reasoning can help. Maybe you are required to take a physical stance and ensure he know you aren't to be messed with...and maybe there is another way to go about it. Either is fine, as long as its appropriate. Try asking your parents about it...they will appreciate the honesty and might have good advice. Good luck bro,
V.R
A
Hi ,
Nice idea trying to suss out the aggressive guys motivation for wanting to chin the young guy.How does the potential victim go about this?Does he ask the other guy to join him overIf a coffee and a doughnut so that they can debate the issue?I do not think this approach would be too successful.Seems to me that the aggressive guy needs to be taught a lesson.If I was the parent of the lad being threatened I would tell him to stand up to the guy and if required be prepared for a battle.

Demetrio Cereijo
06-13-2010, 02:01 PM
thank you so much to all your comments, it will be very helpful, first I will try to talk with him and try to avoid thefight but I don`t know If he want fight I think that I have to, he train in my same dojo , we have the same sensei, he like to fight so much and is so agressive,I only wanted learn martials arts for defend to me in an assault and also for the martial arts philosophy.

Seventeen and still haven't had a fight?

A rough sparring session at the gym with your instructor as referee is what you both need.

lbb
06-13-2010, 04:56 PM
Felipe is from Ecuador. Different culture, different school system from the culture and school system we have in America. It is not wise to give advise based on cultural bias.

...followed by...

He needs to make the decision that he is going to stand up for himself and not be bullied and that this decision might lead to a fight.

David, are you sure you're not doing what you just told others not to do? i.e., gave advice on how to handle this situation?

Buck
06-13-2010, 06:53 PM
thank you so much to all your comments, it will be very helpful, first I will try to talk with him and try to avoid thefight but I don`t know If he want fight I think that I have to, he train in my same dojo , we have the same sensei, he like to fight so much and is so agressive,I only wanted learn martials arts for defend to me in an assault and also for the martial arts philosophy.

This reminds me about a good fish story, but I will not go into that now.

For those who face bullies under such circumstances and at that age, there are number of options to avoid fighting a bully. They are not the easy answers. No one wants to take a beating. No one wants to be a bully's beotch.

Fighting isn't always with the fists, or martial arts techniques, or with weapons. It is also with the mind. There is a saying, if you defeat the king the kingdom falls. Meaning if you physiological defeat a bully under these and like circumstances, the bully will no longer take aggressive actions toward you. Thus, you then have controlled the bully, and there is not physical confrontation. Does this always work, no. But nothing does. Violence is your last option. Especially if you are not a fighter; if you lack fighting experience and are not very competent absent of the mentality for fighting. Which is usually the criteria of why the bully picks a victim.

Therefore you have to take a different angle because if you fight physically, fight the bullies fight, you're at a great disadvantage, and stuff. This means you don't fight his fight, rather fight on your home tuff, where you have the advantage and he is at a disadvantage. This is very much true for those at 17 years old. A bully at this age will succumb to the results of the tactic of fighting smarter and not harder (physically).

The moral here is fight smarter and not harder. Finding other ways then violence to defeat a bully. I remember a Chinese Sifu of Kung Fu tell a group of us that the highest level of Kung fu is to avoid the conflict, as if two tigers fight neither walk away uninjured. Sports fighting is one thing, it has its venue. It is very entertaining. I like pro sport fights like the next guy, being a control fight that for the purpose of entertainment where both people understand and agree to the circumstances, there is great injury to both. Most fighters don't fight for long because of it. And those champions who become famous have to be aware of some bone head challenging them to fight in public. Thus the reason why many hire body guards. That limits a person's freedom. Taking a violent route as being the only solution is not the best.

With this kid and his situation, don't fight. I know your sensei is going to make you or in courage you and stuff to do so. The solution is change your dojo, and yea I know it's the only dojo you can go to, etc. But. you need to change dojos if your sensei allows a fight. Like the old fighter's saying goes, you can't hit something if it isn't there.

If you don't take an Aikido view of the situation, you will need to fight if that is the only option you feel. Then you either kick his butt, or he kicks your butt. And in many latin countries, you become friends because that is the custom, usually at your age and under the circumstances. But not always, and it could be a situation where you could end up his beotch if you fight and lose. But if it is a supervised fight based on pride, then friendship will come of it, under the custom of many Spanish influenced countries.

Like I said, the other opinion is to avoid the fight using your mind; fighting smarter and not harder. :)

mathewjgano
06-13-2010, 07:14 PM
A rough sparring session at the gym with your instructor as referee is what you both need.
I like that idea. I can see how it might channel the conflict into an extention of their training...something to be learned from and moved past, hopefully.

Do what is required,if you beat this guy he wont come back at you.He sounds a moron.
I dunno...the "morons" are often the ones who don't know when to quit, particularly if they feel they have something to prove.

I also just wanted to underscore the previous mentions at understanding what the aggressive kid's motivations are. Like Joe mentioned that can be hard, but most people I've known were pretty up front about why they wanted to fight someone. The simple question, "why do you want to fight me?" seems like a good place to start. Maybe he doesn't have much of a reason to articulate, but if he does then you can at least begin to try to reason with him.
Again, good luck. Do your best and regardless of what happens, keep trying your best. There's no real glory to winning a fight, just as there's no real shame to losing one...my opinion, anyway.

SeiserL
06-13-2010, 07:54 PM
Please read my most recent column.

If you cannot stand up for yourself yet, talk to you sempai or sensei.

dps
06-13-2010, 08:06 PM
David, are you sure you're not doing what you just told others not to do? i.e., gave advice on how to handle this situation?

I am sure I am not.

My advice about standing up for himself (as is the majority of the male posters in this thread) is universal advice for a young man on how to deal with bullying regardless of country, culture, ethnicity, religion etc.
It is something all young men should learn, how to stand up for themselves.
David

Marie Noelle Fequiere
06-13-2010, 08:27 PM
I am sure I am not.

It is something all young men should learn, how to stand up for themselves.
David

And what are we old women supposed to do? :)

Seriously, most bullies choose their victims among the shy and self conscious, because they are actually more scared than they will let you know. What they need is someone who looks at them straight in the eyes and keep moving forward. It's not easy, Felipe, but yes, you need to do that. Calmly ignore his the guy's verbal abuse, and yes, ask with a casual tone: "And why do you feel that you need to fight me? Are you sure it will make you fee better?"
Also, work on your irimi and your tenkan. I understand that after just three months of training, you may not have mastered them yet, so work on them at home. Just evading a technique can confuse an attacker or sometimes, even send him crashing. Then, you can look innocent and say: "I didn't do anything".:D

lbb
06-13-2010, 08:43 PM
And what are we old women supposed to do? :)

Perhaps we're supposed to depend on men to protect us, rather than rely on our own skills and wits.

dps
06-13-2010, 09:19 PM
And what are we old women supposed to do? :)

Perhaps we're supposed to depend on men to protect us, rather than rely on our own skills and wits.

You are suppose to say, "whoa take it easy" :)

David

Buck
06-14-2010, 01:01 AM
There is a saying live by the sword, die by the sword. How many old warriors who live realize that violence isn't the way. They reflect back on their lives and say when they were young the sought out violence. But being fortune not to be cripple and alive to tell about it they say that is a life of error. This happens in many cultures, and has been happening for generations.

Yea, you can say we are wired as young men for violence, though I disagree and point to all the male geeks and nerds. I watch my nephews and their friends act out fights and lean toward violence where my nieces put much less effort in expressing it as the boys.

When great violence occurs like a serial killer, the likes of both men and women they have some mental illness, or warped sense of reality. They lack a moral compass among other such disturbing things. Look at bullies, they are made and not born. Look at violent criminals who have violent childhood. Look at violent environment and the mess they are, and the psychological effects it has on people.

Look at rulers who ruled by violence like Mary Tutor, King Henry VIII, the Emperors such as Caesars of Rome like Caligula where insanity and mental illness, and violence walk hand in hand.

Look at Scare Face, or other organized crime figures, all rule with violence. Look at the lives they lead. Look how violence used as a tool for power and influence always back fires and is used on them by other mobsters. There was some truth to the Godfather movies.

Take some parts of the world where violence is a tool use for change. What are the results? Lots of dead people, countries destroyed. Look at Hitler, Pol pot, and others how far and what did they get on the path of violence.

I remember reading about the Alamo, and how that was an utterly waste of life, as the means to solve a problem was with violence. Because diplomacy is what really got the problem solved and not fighting.

Look at the Jews and the Palestinians and all that mess, where diplomacy fails and violence dominates which has gotten no where for thousands of years,

Look at soldiers who have a lot of training to over come the mental effects of being violent. How it even changes many of them to being non-violent.
These are the things that are often over looked in the association of violence.

There are so many examples of how violence isn't the way. That living a violent life means you will die a violent life. That a violent life is not a productive or pleasant life. And how so many great warriors realize that and moved to a life of non-violence.

Yes, violence is a part of the human experience as it is for so, not all mammals. It is used to protect against those who are violent, but that doesn't mean we have to make a life out of it. It doesn't have to be a template for solving all our problems, either. It can be avoided and still have acceptable results where safety, and problems can be solved without having to be violent. Remember criminals use violence as a tool. Non-criminals use violence only when necessary.

Shadowfax
06-14-2010, 07:40 AM
When I was growing up I got bullied a lot. Jumped by groups of kids in the neighborhood and even at school. Teachers never seemed to see it happening.... For years I just took it walked away tried to be peaceful and not fight. All that got me was more and worse bullying. Heck I even changed schools and entire neighborhoods and still I was the target of the local bullies.

How did I change that? I stopped taking it.
One day in particular put an end to it. I was in shop class getting picked on as usual and no teacher noticing as usual. I kept ignoring it and refusing to react until this kid came at my face with a 2x4.....

Then I took it off of him in one move and hit him upside the rear as hard as I could. I only hit him once but I made it count. Bet he didn't know a fat girl could move that fast. I hear the bruise was spectacular. Any rate the bullying stopped.

Not condoning violence but sometimes you have to stop letting people push you around.

Buck
06-14-2010, 08:06 AM
When I was growing up I got bullied a lot. Jumped by groups of kids in the neighborhood and even at school.

Unfortunately,it is sad that what made you a target of so many bullies probably was your weight. And thus, maybe you being timid and with drawn, and reserved because of it. And possibly the low self-esteem associated with your weight and age. And how you seen things as a kid, may all have played into you being a target so many times? It is too bad you had to be pushed to an extent that communicating with violence was a way to stop the bullying. I completely understand.

To help others out by sharing more of your situation and insights, saying that is in all or some respects true, looking back, would personality change have helped make you less of a target? Say, if you were funny, a bit more out going, loud and boisterous in speech, carried your weight differently. Using your weight as a message that said, I am big and don't mess with me. Stuff like that for example, would that have changed you from being a target of so many bullies? And thus, not having to hit back, when it was the last straw. All this of course is in retrospect.

I think you could provide some great insight. I would like to hear it because girls are usually targets of verbally bullies who are other girls. Like the many incidences girl being intimidated, threaten, mocked and all that stuff, now, though texting and internet. We don't hear much of girls being physically bullied, by boys, in the same way boys are bullied. Like we don't hear much of boys being bullied by a girl(s) on the internet or texting in the same way girls are. Maybe more of your insights can help further on, if changing your demeanor and how you seen yourself and all that could have had an effect, or not, in your situation? :)

Buck
06-14-2010, 08:43 AM
My view, which isn't the only one, and my experience, which isn't the only type, has taught me how not to be a target. In a nutshell, bullies look for those who will not fight back and will summit to their will. Avoiding becoming a target is to change body language, speech, demeanor, and attitude. If you're not a target, there is no need to physically employ violence to stand up for yourself. The rub is avoiding being a bullied all together before it happens. Not being on the bullies radar, I apply the importance of this more heavily to the situations of kids and teenagers. Since that is who we are talking about.

And to note, recently there was a very violent incident (of many we are now seeing of more then ever before) of how school girls violently attack other girl classmates. To the extent of sending the victim to the hospital. That is pretty intense and serious violence. Even more of the importance to avoid being on bullies radar.

Shadowfax
06-14-2010, 09:55 AM
Unfortunately,it is sad that what made you a target of so many bullies probably was your weight. And thus, maybe you being timid and with drawn, and reserved because of it. And possibly the low self-esteem associated with your weight and age. And how you seen things as a kid, may all have played into you being a target so many times? It is too bad you had to be pushed to an extent that communicating with violence was a way to stop the bullying. I completely understand.

To help others out by sharing more of your situation and insights, saying that is in all or some respects true, looking back, would personality change have helped make you less of a target? Say, if you were funny, a bit more out going, loud and boisterous in speech, carried your weight differently. Using your weight as a message that said, I am big and don't mess with me. Stuff like that for example, would that have changed you from being a target of so many bullies? And thus, not having to hit back, when it was the last straw. All this of course is in retrospect.

I think you could provide some great insight. I would like to hear it because girls are usually targets of verbally bullies who are other girls. Like the many incidences girl being intimidated, threaten, mocked and all that stuff, now, though texting and internet. We don't hear much of girls being physically bullied, by boys, in the same way boys are bullied. Like we don't hear much of boys being bullied by a girl(s) on the internet or texting in the same way girls are. Maybe more of your insights can help further on, if changing your demeanor and how you seen yourself and all that could have had an effect, or not, in your situation? :)

Actually my weight was not a problem until high school and the bullying began in the first grade.....I believe I put that on as a form of protection actually in an attempt to get rid of some very unwelcome male attention....

Being the new kid in school on almost a yearly yearly basis ( was in at least 7 different schools), being in a very poor family... at one point we were homeless for about 5 months....being a very shy withdrawn kid, having no support from family or parents, broken home, and growing up surrounded by drugs, violence, abuses of all sorts... basically my self esteem was crap so since I saw myself that way so did everyone else.

More than happy to share my experiences if it can help some kid to not go through the crap I dealt with.

Say, if you were funny, a bit more out going, loud and boisterous in speech, carried your weight differently. Using your weight as a message that said, I am big and don't mess with me. Stuff like that for example, would that have changed you from being a target of so many bullies? And thus, not having to hit back, when it was the last straw.

Actually these are many of the things I learned to adopt later in life and have found helpful. I had a bully as an adult who constantly terrorized me at work. (the boss was his buddy and pretended not to see) Again it was when I stood up to him that he quit. After that I decided to try something a bit different. I started being really nice to him. No matter what he said to me I answered beyond nice calling him dear and sweetheart and precious and in about 6 months he and I were working together and getting along like old pals. Then I got my boss fired and got another job. ;)

StevieT
06-14-2010, 11:13 AM
...My friend tell me that I have to fight with him but I don`t know what I have to do , I have a little scared I had never fought with anybody, please can you give some advice??...

Make some different friends! Or is this friend really just your own ego talking to you?

From your post it sounds very much like you're simply engaged in beta-monkey status fighting. I think this is an urge that most adolescent males go through at some point, but most get through it without actually engaging in real fighting in any serious capacity. At your age and with a bit of training, you're probably at the point where you could seriously hurt each other if you go too far, so be careful.

Bear in mind that in modern society this kind of social dominance fighting really achieves very little and is very risky. You could either get seriously hurt or you could be arrested and tried if you seriously hurt him. "I was defending myself" is not going to hold much water if he has challenged you to a fight and you have accepted that challenge. Legally, this is considered consensual fighting and in most jurisdictions, you will both be considered to be assaulting each other. The upshot is that the "winner" is likely to be arrested and charged and depending on how much damage has been done, the charges could be really serious.

If it really is simple bullying, then bear in mind that the thing that really marks out a victim is an unwillingness to seek help. Bullies generally need their victims isolated, and victims that isolate themselves (normally because their self-esteem relies on them dealing with the bully alone) are easy prey. Do you really need to face this guy alone? Why? Why can't this "friend" who's told you that you have to fight him help you?

felipe_3
06-14-2010, 07:54 PM
heyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy...
I thank you very much, today I told with him and he didn`t want to fight with me.
before I didn`t practice the movements in kick boxing when my sensei taught to me, now I will do all the movements.
And again thank you so much you all are like a family to me thanks for the advices.

gracias a todos por los comentarios

Marie Noelle Fequiere
06-14-2010, 08:24 PM
It was our pleasure, Felippe, and we are so happy to learn that everything is going fine for you. You see, sometimes, all you need to do is to be a little more assertive, and things get better much easier than you'd expected.
Anyway, guess what? I am sure that you will never have any idea how many peopled YOU helped with your post. They may never tell you, but they will still be grateful.
Keep training and holding your head high, we are so proud of you.
God bless both you and your new friend.
And keep practicing your tenkan (I insist).;)

dps
06-15-2010, 05:52 AM
I am glad you did not have to fight.

David

Shadowfax
06-15-2010, 05:55 AM
I'm really happy to hear you worked it out without having to fight. :)

Ketsan
06-15-2010, 06:35 PM
[QUOTE=Felipe Gomez;259053]
he try to beat to me but he couldn`t [\QUOTE]

Sounds like you have the situation well in hand.

ruthmc
06-17-2010, 08:26 AM
Hi Felipe,

Glad you talked things through :) Sounds to me like this 'friend' of yours was just trying to see who has the most testosterone... :rolleyes:

In future, if he wants a fight, you ask your Sensei to set it up in the dojo and have Sensei as your referee. That is fair.

Ruth

Russell Davis
07-24-2010, 04:10 PM
Hi, One thing I really hate is bullies, but hey its part of life!
You could approach him without his buddies hanging around and simply say to him; Hey I dont want to fight or hurt you, I would much rather hang out and share in your knowledge of martial arts
maybe even go to a Seminar or train together?

Some bullies might see this as a weakness so its not without risk
and it may be you are just going to have to put up or shut up!
life is full of choices.

I was bullied and worse for YEARS, it was not until things happend and they left me alone, but went is search of another "weak" victim.

If he's in front of you showing off to his buddies, kick him in the nuts, or headbut him on the nose, or both, or don't!

dongaleb
07-24-2010, 08:27 PM
When I was reading this thread I was imagining Felipe practicing in a beach doing the eagle kick:D .

"Take off your jacket...pick up your jacket.":o

Congratulations to you Felipe, you won the fight without fighting.

You asked the right people here.

"Wax on! Wax off!" I'm sorry, I just had to say that...(chuckles)

marko.harkonen
07-29-2010, 08:46 AM
.. talk with your sensei, let him have a word with this guy. there is no need to go into a fight with him. as so many here already said: violence leads to more violence (always!). and the only looser is the one that takes up his fists. and if the situation leads to him getting on to you, then fine, try to defend yourself, without wanting to hurt him. it IS possible - IF you want to.

by the way. i see some comments from quite high graded aikidokas here. where is your spirit of aiki, of nonviolence?

Felipe.. go home and watch the movie Gandhi. thats aikido on a very very very high level.

Namaste!

marko.harkonen
07-29-2010, 08:48 AM
and then maybe i should read ALL the comments.. then just maybe even i could see that felipe solved the situation - without fighting!!

WELL done!!

:)

ksy
09-12-2010, 12:10 PM
some martial artist need their egos polished. if it happens again, next time could tell the fella 'your kick boxing skills are so good, you're gonna kick my ass for sure. hey, how about you give me some pointers instead, the sensei kinda sucks.....". :)

bulevardi
09-15-2010, 07:54 AM
Try Tai Sabaki moves to avoid his kicks and punches, unbalance him.

lbb
09-16-2010, 07:48 AM
As zombie threads go, this one isn't too old and rotten...but wasn't this issue resolved some time ago?