Keeping the Faith by Ross Robertson
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I slept with faith and found a corpse in my arms on awakening;
I drank and danced all night with doubt and found her a virgin in the
morning.
~ Aleister Crowley
A number of questions continually arise for the practitioner of
aikido. "Will aikido make me a better person?" "Is aikido the best
martial art?" "Is aikido even a martial art?" "Is aikido a way to
reconcile the world?" "Can I really defend myself with aikido?" "Is
there a style which is the best form of aikido?"
Contemplating or discussing these issues can be a valuable exercise.
In itself, this kind of thoughtful consideration is one aspect of our
training. But don't expect to arrive at any definitive conclusions.
These questions, and many more like them, have already been discussed
ad nauseam, and satisfactory answers are still not forthcoming.
It might be that our collective wisdom is not yet mature or
sophisticated enough to deal with these issues. I prefer to think
that the real reason for our lack of good answers is that the
questions themselves are flawed. Each of these questions implies a
right "yes" or "no" answer. And to answer "yes" or "no" to such
questions is to lie.
Deep down we all know this.1 And even
though we may generally agree that aikido is about balance, many of us
are very uncomfortable holding the balance between yes and no. We
prefer instead to feel secure in one or the other, as if only our
right hand or our left hand were true. We have allowed ourselves to be
thrown by a false premise.
Any time our answers do not seem to be satisfactory, perhaps we
should ask better questions. For example, instead of asking "Will
aikido work?" we might ask "Under what conditions will aikido work?"
"What are the limits of my aikido currently, and what would I resort
to if those limits are surpassed?" "What can I do to extend those
limits so my aikido will work more broadly?" "How can I avoid those
situations that my aikido may not yet be sufficient to handle?" "Is
that also aikido?"
To ask questions this way puts us on a path of discovery. The answers
may not be immediate, but the parameters give meaning to the inquiry.
We understand that there can still be "yes" and "no" answers, but
they are conditional. And best of all, we can do a lot to change
conditions.
The irony here is that in seeking the absolute, we inevitably wallow
in a quagmire. Yet if we accept a certain fluid ambiguity as the
truth, then our path is much clearer.
Some truths are discoverable, but personal preferences can blind us
to those truths. And when we uncover a truth, we must be willing to
examine the limits and conditions of that particular truth. Ask
yourself good questions: "Is this a real defense technique, or is
this an exercise to develop a certain skill?" "Is my 'knowing'
interfering with my 'learning?'" "Are things that are not provable
still able to be somehow useful?" "If a thing is useful to me, must I
insist that it is true for everyone?" And finally, one of the best
questions for anyone, any time: "How do I know?"
Is aikido a religion? A science? A philosophy? Is aikido a new dance
form? Is it a sport? Is it combat? Is it love? Is it art?
The answer is simple:
Yes and no.
No question about it.
Footnotes:
1 This statement is also
a lie. A declaration of the author's suspicion is stated as a fact,
when the truth is actually unverifiable. How many more lies can you
detect in this essay? In yourself?
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