Sensei is a nutball and I had enough.

I started Aikido on a whim almost 3 years ago. At that time I was lazy, weak, fat and ineffectual. I was an impotent human being.

At first everything was so new and exciting and intimidating, even then, the seed was planted. Here was a kid barely a year older than me but with 13 years of Aikido behind him giving me a lecture on how you can blow someone over from a distance using your "ki". Every fibre of my being screamed bullshit but I smiled, shrugged innocently and continued giving him my utmost respect.

I hoped that these kind of talks would be once-in-a-bluemoon kind of things but regularly he went on to tell absolutely ridiculous stories of throwing and pinning 5 thugs, supposedly helping the police track down a kidnapper and snapping the man's gun from his hands. Being assaulted by a local pseudo celebrity kickboxing champ and knocking him out with one technique (in defence of a woman's honour -- obviously :/ ) Absolute nonsense. For the first 2.5 years I ignored his stories and concentrated on doing the technique.

The stories continued and with every retelling another fantastic element got added, he seemed to forget that I heard those lies before. Pretty soon he was telling of how he learned secret technique from a mysterious 10th dan that visited only briefly and which only he knew about or how top Japanese instructors were congratulating him on having genuine Samurai spirit. I had to use every ounce of willpower to keep from rolling my eyes so violently that I might pass out. If only he would shut the hell up and stop being such an arrogant jackass I might learn from him, and I did.

Now, I had enough, I still love Aikido, I love doing it, I love experimenting with interesting elements that I read up about with willing folks before and after class but Sensei has turned into an arrogant asshole right before my eyes.

I remember vividly how he had us doing seated meditation until at his insistance he could "see" O sensei standing by his portrait at the kamiza smiling at us. I almost got up and walked out like so many bright interested folks before me who's saturation levels with his bullshit were obviously much lower.

I need to find a different instructor, a more balanced person who is mature and technically capable and does not insist on feeding me a line of unbelievable bullshit day after day, sadly the only other instructors that are available to me practice at crazy hours, are huge distances away or dont have stable dojos (premises or students).

I am certainly not saying that I have all the answers but I certainly know when I'm being fed a line of crap and my current instructor stinks of it. There are many more examples of his insane stories that I can list but I myself am embarressed to admit to what I nodded and smiled about while persuing technical instruction from him.

Wow!
Haul ass...Find a REAL instructor....
(Did I ever tell you about the time I crushed my enemies, drove them before me and..Oh I did? Crap!)

Lan

In medical term this is called psychosis/schiz. Fret not, modern medicine has a cure for it, thank god.

Here, I usually have to face endless questions from new students about how to do long range ki blasts...
Anyway, good luck in finding a new dojo!

Regards,

Dear Anon, has your sensei published a collection of his feats of ma prowess yet? I have run out of comics for bathroom reading and always appreciate new avenues of humour.

Good luck with a finding a new dojo and gold star for not decking the cretin with a jo.

3 years... wow. You _are_ patient.

Find another dojo as in my experience those idiots are rare.

Yeh - I think aikido has a tendancy to bring out nutcase stories like this (although I'm sure other martial arts suffer to some degree as well). The hierarchical nature of martial arts tends to make people bullshit to maintain their high status, and revel in their inflatted ego.

I am lucky/unlucky enough to have used my aikido in some real incidents and actually feel it saved my life once; and sometimes I mention incidents to illustrate specific points. However anyone that's been in a few situations understands there is a massive random element and anyone can be killed or severely injured, even by an untrained person. Sometimes it is difficult to get people to understand the practical application of aikido because aikido is non-competitive, and thus experiences of its practical use are passed on.

However, as Ueshiba said, sincerity is the most important quality in aikido - without it we're just spouting mumbo-jumbo which we have made up, or someone else has passed on to us, and then real improvement is extemely difficult. Don't believe what ANYONE says, find out things for yourself. Even if your instructor is a weirdo, determine whether he has anything to teach you (you can ignore his shit) - if not, get out of there!

If this is how your truly see it, politely bow as you leave the mat.

Has your sensei promoted himself to 10th dan yet? I'd ask for some independent verification of his escapades. Gee Sensei, I'd love to read that article or the police report where you helped them. If no article or whatever, then I'd say gee sensei this is so great we need to get this published in the papers.

I don't know how old your sensei is-either he is approaching the Alzheimer's range or he's got some serious ego or psychological problems. Perhaps he is a Yellow Bamboo practitioner .

Run, do not walk, to another dojo.

John Riggs wrote: Run, do not walk, to another dojo.

Agreed. And I'm a ki-wielding aiki-fruity

Bronson

p.s. Ask him to knock you over with a ki blast. If he can really do it I'll move to wherever he is to train with him

Bronson Diffin wrote: Agreed. And I'm a ki-wielding aiki-fruity Bronson p.s. Ask him to knock you over with a ki blast. If he can really do it I'll move to wherever he is to train with him

My ki blasts come out my ass and I can knock people down with it, or at least drive them back a good five feet.

Rock

Hiroaki Izumi wrote: My ki blasts come out my ass and I can knock people down with it, or at least drive them back a good five feet. Rock

Sorry to hear that you suffer so bad with flatulence!

Si Wilson wrote: Sorry to hear that you suffer so bad with flatulence!

That's not flatulence! It's Ki!
I've spent years perfecting this technique!
My Ki is so strong I can Kiai without opening my mouth!
Rock

Bronson Diffin wrote: p.s. Ask him to knock you over with a ki blast.

A visiting sensei once told us how he could use his ki for long-range no-touch throws, yellow bamboo style. We asked him to try it on us, but he said that since we aren't trained to receive such techniques it could be very dangerous for us... of course several of the ex-judo guys were silently screaming "Let me at 'em!"

Regards,

Pretty soon he was telling of how he learned secret technique from a mysterious 10th dan that visited only briefly and which only he knew about or how top Japanese instructors were congratulating him on having genuine Samurai spirit.

Run away...run away...

Si Wilson wrote: Sorry to hear that you suffer so bad with flatulence!

He doesn't suffer. He enjoys every minute of it

Bronson

Joezer Mandagi wrote: A visiting sensei once told us how he could use his ki for long-range no-touch throws, yellow bamboo style. We asked him to try it on us, but he said that since we aren't trained to receive such techniques it could be very dangerous for us... of course several of the ex-judo guys were silently screaming "Let me at 'em!" Regards,

"No Touch Throws!"

The only dojo where a no touch throw could be real would have a membership of Tinkerbell, Wendy and Peter Pan!

I was at a seminar not so long back and partnered up with another black belt as he looked quite stocky and could handle himself (remember I train Yoshinkan - Aiki Thug!). The technique was Irimi Tsuki (what some might call Shomen Ate). I did the technique on him and put him down. He then complained that I had touched him. Apparently I should have showed him my hand just in front of his face and he would fall over!!!!

Of course I ignored him!!!!!

Si, you bully! I'm currently working on the next stage of the no touch throw with a working title of "no see-um". With this technique you completely ignore your uke for long enough that they wander off and train with someone else, thus establishing your dominance as you've removed a potential attacker without ever even having to connect with them at all. (note: advanced students should use a Kaia mutter and a ki caress of ones own body for full effect)

Ian Hurst wrote: Si, you bully! I'm currently working on the next stage of the no touch throw with a working title of "no see-um". With this technique you completely ignore your uke for long enough that they wander off and train with someone else, thus establishing your dominance as you've removed a potential attacker without ever even having to connect with them at all. (note: advanced students should use a Kaia mutter and a ki caress of ones own body for full effect)

I've noticed that if you empty your mind that it helps pass the time. Next time bring a crossword puzzle.
Nosoapfu and halitosisjutsu are actually a significant part of my no touch throws but they seem to be indiscriminate. It's something like a mobile personal force-field, especially down wind.

I'm so sorry you have had this bad experience!! The right teacher will come in the right time. It must be hard to trust that right now.

There are many more examples of his insane stories that I can list but I myself am embarressed to admit to what I nodded and smiled about while persuing technical instruction from him.

I have to wonder about the value of this "teacher's" technical instruction... Charlatans who have to make this stuff up doubtfully had legitimate instruction themselves. I sincerely hope for you that when you do find your place to train, you haven't been polluted with bad habits.

The hierarchical nature of martial arts tends to make people bullshit to maintain their high status, and revel in their inflatted ego.

I think they bullsit to *achieve* status, not maintian it. If they had legitimate ranking / abitily to begin with, there would be no need to inflate an ego.

Hiroaki Izumi wrote: That's not flatulence! It's Ki! I've spent years perfecting this technique! My Ki is so strong I can Kiai without opening my mouth!

So ki is just another term for lactose intolerance. This means I should drink a lot of unfermented dairy product before hitting the dojo. Thanks for the tip!

If flatulence really is Ki power, then I had it years before I started martial arts. I could apparently project people out of the room as a 2 year old ("Parp"), a whole 10 years before I put on a Gi!!!!!

As some very knowledgeable Shihan have said, young children already know the fundamental principles of Aikido. As we grow, we forget and begin to use our muscles inefficiently. I have tried to keep my child-like knowledge by practicing daily with the muscles used to project my Ki. And yes, unfermented dairy products do help in the development of Ki, at least for some people, so does a good pot of baked beans.. Now, I have to go and practice my Ki projection in the appropriate surroundings. My office is getting too full of Ki.

Just curious to find out what kind of work he does for a living outside the dojo. This might be interesting to find out...or not.

anon - You mentioned that some of your alternatives are teachers without stable dojo's or students.
Well now that you have some experience go check them out for yourself. Not having a permanent facility is not necessarily a bad thing. There are many reasons why there may be smaller classes or less students with these teachers. But make your own evaluation, with an open mind.
Check the dojo search engine to make sure you are not missing anyone.