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Old 10-30-2012, 08:43 AM   #1
Richard Stevens
Location: Indianapolis
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Best Techniques for the Zombie Apocolypse

In the spirit of Halloween I was curious exactly what everyone's go-to technique would be when faced with a single zombie or even a hoarde. Undead randori!

My favorite techniques, which I've lovingly nicknamed mean-nikkyo, wouldn't get the desired response so I'm thinking something along the lines of aikinage would be appropriate. Of course breaking out the shinken would be first priority.
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Old 10-30-2012, 09:14 AM   #2
chillzATL
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Re: Best Techniques for the Zombie Apocolypse

well, you didn't state if said zombie's are the classic shamblers or those new-fangled runners. Of course, everyone knows shamblers are the only real zombies, but it's best not to assume.

If it's just one, outwalk it and save your energy.

if it's a group, shamblers have worse balance than the typical aikidoka and also attack far more woodenly. You can just grab one by the arm and sliing it into the group. Chances are good they'll topple over and you can walk on, rinse and repeat as needed.

note: Careful with atemi to the face. A scraped knuckle on a tooth might as well be a bite. It's not worth the risk when pain and distraction aren't going to help.

note 2: Cardio, cardio, cardio.
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Old 10-30-2012, 09:16 AM   #3
phitruong
Dojo: Charlotte Aikikai Agatsu Dojo
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Re: Best Techniques for the Zombie Apocolypse

before you talk about techniques you need to know the zombie rules. you can find the list of rules here http://www.zombielandrules.com/

since zombies don't feel pain, therefore, all those pain compliant techniques won't work. empty hand techniques would just delay the inevitable of you get eaten. so break out the shiken and go to town. don't forget the double tap rule. you see this problem in many movies when folks don't follow the double tap rule, and ended up with the bad guys getting up and shoot you in the back. of course aikido folks will get eaten first, because of the harmony and loving toward your attacker attitude.

"budo is putting on cold, wet, sweat stained gi with a smile and a snarl" - your truly
http://charlotteaikikai.org
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Old 10-30-2012, 10:00 AM   #4
Mark Harrington
Dojo: Aikido Arnis of Farmville
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Re: Best Techniques for the Zombie Apocolypse

There's a book of zombie stories that has a story about aikidoka. It involves katanas and other bladed weapons. Keeping range on a zombie is important when a scratch or bite is fatal.
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Old 10-30-2012, 01:35 PM   #5
Rob Watson
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Re: Best Techniques for the Zombie Apocolypse

Lot's of fat slow friends who will no doubt run interference while one makes a getaway. And guns, lots of guns - and even more ammo. And fences on top of thick stone walls with a deep moat with fast moving water filled with sharks with fricken laser beams - and many mastif/irish wolf hound mix dogs. And spam (killing zombies makes one peckish).

"In my opinion, the time of spreading aikido to the world is finished; now we have to focus on quality." Yamada Yoshimitsu

Ultracrepidarianism ... don't.
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Old 10-30-2012, 01:44 PM   #6
ChrisHein
 
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Re: Best Techniques for the Zombie Apocolypse

All Buki waza!

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Old 10-30-2012, 02:14 PM   #7
Chonin
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Re: Best Techniques for the Zombie Apocolypse

Jo staff + giant size Hershey's Dark Chocolate bar= Move like a beam of light; Fly like lightning, Strike like thunder, Whirl in circles around a stable center.
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Old 10-30-2012, 05:35 PM   #8
phitruong
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Re: Best Techniques for the Zombie Apocolypse

Quote:
Chris Hein wrote: View Post
All Buki waza!
including kabuki? i am no actor, but wouldn't the zombie hate it just as much as normal folks?

"budo is putting on cold, wet, sweat stained gi with a smile and a snarl" - your truly
http://charlotteaikikai.org
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Old 10-30-2012, 10:14 PM   #9
GMaroda
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Re: Best Techniques for the Zombie Apocolypse

The best technique against zombies? Headgroin! Headgroin! Headgroin!

http://.youtube.com%2Fwatch%3Fv%3D_7...0Jj5t6tqlsLDTQ

Ameri-do-te is truly the ultimate martial art. Everything else is bull....
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Old 10-31-2012, 09:24 AM   #10
Neal Earhart
 
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Re: Best Techniques for the Zombie Apocolypse

Kotetsu + Kesa or Gyaku Kesa giri = Headless zombie

Rinse and repeat on the hoards...

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Old 10-31-2012, 11:02 AM   #11
Rob Watson
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Re: Best Techniques for the Zombie Apocolypse

Or one of these set about neck high.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0IOTg...eature=related

"In my opinion, the time of spreading aikido to the world is finished; now we have to focus on quality." Yamada Yoshimitsu

Ultracrepidarianism ... don't.
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Old 10-31-2012, 07:08 PM   #12
phitruong
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Re: Best Techniques for the Zombie Apocolypse

Quote:
Robert M Watson Jr wrote: View Post
Or one of these set about neck high.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0IOTg...eature=related
ooohhhh i want one of those. can you mount some sort of flame thrower on it?

"budo is putting on cold, wet, sweat stained gi with a smile and a snarl" - your truly
http://charlotteaikikai.org
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Old 11-01-2012, 07:02 PM   #13
Malicat
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Re: Best Techniques for the Zombie Apocolypse

Quote:
Richard Stevens wrote: View Post
In the spirit of Halloween I was curious exactly what everyone's go-to technique would be when faced with a single zombie or even a hoarde. Undead randori!
As always, Master Ken has the answer!

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_7a3...483ACB23E84EE2

--Ashley
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Old 11-03-2012, 12:29 AM   #14
OwlMatt
 
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Re: Best Techniques for the Zombie Apocolypse

I think you'd have to stick to techniques that keep your distance from the zombie's bite. That means iriminage is probably out, as is any kind of kokyunage that has nage sticking his hand in uke's face.

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Old 11-09-2012, 07:18 AM   #15
Richard Stevens
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Re: Best Techniques for the Zombie Apocolypse

You could always keep a pair of those big Ono Ha Ittoryu kote. In all seriousness I proposed a Zombie Apocalypse mitigation plan as the subject of my master's dissertation. For some reason they thought it wasn't a good idea...
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Old 11-09-2012, 02:40 PM   #16
Rob Watson
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Re: Best Techniques for the Zombie Apocolypse

Quote:
Richard Stevens wrote: View Post
I proposed a Zombie Apocalypse mitigation plan as the subject of my master's dissertation. For some reason they thought it wasn't a good idea...
Wait, they think it is a good idea just to hang out with zombies? Talk about disconnected from reality!

"In my opinion, the time of spreading aikido to the world is finished; now we have to focus on quality." Yamada Yoshimitsu

Ultracrepidarianism ... don't.
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Old 11-10-2012, 08:58 AM   #17
Krystal Locke
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Re: Best Techniques for the Zombie Apocolypse

Quote:
Richard Stevens wrote: View Post
You could always keep a pair of those big Ono Ha Ittoryu kote. In all seriousness I proposed a Zombie Apocalypse mitigation plan as the subject of my master's dissertation. For some reason they thought it wasn't a good idea...
The CDC did much the same. That is some awesome. http://emergency.cdc.gov/socialmedia/zombies.asp

I'd like to remind the folk in the compound that while I am old, fat, not into breeding and do not have huge stockpiles of ammo, I do know how to make both biodiesel and ethanol from common household items.
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Old 11-15-2012, 12:48 AM   #18
Krystal Locke
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Re: Best Techniques for the Zombie Apocolypse

And why did nobody tell me about this gem?

http://asianwiki.com/Yoroi:_The_Samurai_Zombie
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Old 11-15-2012, 08:50 AM   #19
phitruong
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Re: Best Techniques for the Zombie Apocolypse

Quote:
Krystal Locke wrote: View Post
And why did nobody tell me about this gem?

http://asianwiki.com/Yoroi:_The_Samurai_Zombie
i see your samurai zombie and raise you one ninja zombie http://www.ninjazombiesfilm.com/

however, pirate zombie trumped them all http://www.tomsmithonline.com/lyrics...es_in_love.htm

"budo is putting on cold, wet, sweat stained gi with a smile and a snarl" - your truly
http://charlotteaikikai.org
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Old 11-16-2012, 11:03 AM   #20
lars beyer
Dojo: Copenhagen Aikishuren Dojo
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Re: Best Techniques for the Zombie Apocolypse

my favourite weapon would be this !

https://www.tvbgone.com/cfe_tvbg_main.php

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Old 11-16-2012, 11:14 AM   #21
lars beyer
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Re: Best Techniques for the Zombie Apocolypse

Quote:
Lars Beyer wrote: View Post
my favourite weapon would be this !

https://www.tvbgone.com/cfe_tvbg_main.php

"You can use TV-B-Gone® to control access to television for philosophical or practical reasons, or simply to have fun!"
—Mitch Altman, Inventor of TV-B-Gone®
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Old 11-23-2012, 12:23 PM   #22
RuteMendes
Dojo: Dramático de Cascais
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Re: Best Techniques for the Zombie Apocolypse

Aikido for a zombie apocalypse? ahah Well, I guess the best technique for a yellow belt like me would be the "RunForYourLifes-nage" yeah xD ahahah
Now, seriously, maybe Kokyu Nage? Or something with bukiwaza... i don't know! Anything except Iriminage o.O too much contact with a zombie!
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Old 11-23-2012, 03:07 PM   #23
Neal Earhart
 
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Re: Best Techniques for the Zombie Apocolypse

Now we need techniques for the impending Space Alien invasion....
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Old 11-30-2012, 02:41 PM   #24
Nick Hentschel
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Re: Best Techniques for the Zombie Apocolypse

Aikido vs. zombies would be a first-rate exercise in RUN-dori, I think!

I'd rather use Kyudo: at least I could put an arrow in their brains.
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