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Old 04-05-2009, 11:00 AM   #26
Mary Eastland
 
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Dojo: Berkshire Hills Aikido
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Re: Sensei -- drinking??

If someone has a drinking problem the playing field may not be as even as one might think. Especially in a society that explains away unaceptable behavior surrounding alcohol use. The writer has already set up an excuse for the teacher drinking.
Like I said before people don't like to be called out on their behavior...the consequenses might be more than she is bargaining for.
I think her strategy is a good one..she has asked for support and spoke her truth...good job. I hope it all works out for you.
Mary
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Old 04-05-2009, 04:33 PM   #27
jennifer paige smith
 
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Re: Sensei -- drinking??

Quote:
Heather Randolph wrote: View Post
I think Sensei needs a break! See if someone can offer to take his classes on for awhile because he obviously cannot teach in this condition. I'm sure he feels he can, but he can't. He's coming to work intoxicated that is not good for his students. Definitely do it soon.
Great suggestion, Heather!
I support this approach completely.
Very practical, considerate, helpful and sustaining to all involved. Good Budo.

Jennifer Paige Smith
Confluence Aikido Systems
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Old 04-06-2009, 02:02 PM   #28
"Lisa-1978"
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Re: Sensei -- drinking??

I agree that someone replacing the sensei is a great idea. One problem though ... highest rank is 5th kyu ... :|

Was gonna chat with my friend at the dojo tonight but he is not going to be there, so I will hopefully see him tomorrow and discuss then.

Thanks for all the input thus far,

L.
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Old 04-14-2009, 03:00 PM   #29
Phil Van Treese
Dojo: Tampa Judo and Aikido Dojo, Tampa, Fl
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Re: Sensei -- drinking??

Myself, and 2 instrs. always have 2-3 beers after class, never before class, and talk about how class went. If you smell alcohol on a sensei's breath during class, I couldn't tell you how to handle it other talk to a senior student and raise the concern thru him. If it gets worse, I'd find another dojo because you never know how someone will react to a stimulus while "lit". You don't need to lose any teeth.
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Old 04-15-2009, 09:33 PM   #30
Buck
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Re: Sensei -- drinking??

Aw ha!

Here is the deal, drunken Sensei (sounds like a movie) in class. Going through brake with girl friend of 9 years. So Sensei now drinks breastly all the time to numb as an escape of the pain of broken heart of course. Lisa states, he is intoxicated on the mat. Therefore, we can deduct the dude is a drunk. Lisa1978 doesn't tell us how other students feel except for senior student who is frustrated too, Lisa1978 is concerned if she speaks to him he will take it as if she is interested in her. But she says she is a poor communicator and she fears her words can get misinterpreted. And the senior "male" student is shut down.

Therefore, the responsibility to fix this problem falls on the shoulders of our heroine Lisa1978, who is a bad communicator and thus, is afraid the drunken sensei will get the wrong message and sexually make an advance, or something like that.

Frankly, thinking the Sensei in a committed relationship for nine years whose heart is broken is going to hit on her while in the dojo and drunk is stereotyping men and is a bit vain, unless Lisa1978 is FHM cover hott! then yea! Why is there soooo many posts that model this scenerio in various degress? I think there is a conspiracy going on against men. .

Me being a bit skeptical,insulted as a man, and feeling that I got played, the probability is very high. Called it Pro-male Defensiveness. Yes, I know, I am a white male, I don't have that right to be insulted or defensive. BUT, more importantly, there are allot of people who gave sincere, and good advice. it would be a shame if they where played for the sake of someone's agenda.

If this scenario is real and the people giving advice are being respected and not being played. I want to be sincere and respectful, and NOT joke around. My response would be then, that it is the WHOLE dojo's responsibility as a group and individuals to tell the sensei they are concerned. If their concerns are not met and he doesn't stop drinking then it is up to each individual to decide what they want to do. After all it is his dojo, he is the Sensei. If it is a real big problem, and his drinking is scary enough that it might end up hurting someone or himself, then stopping Aikido training for awhile or driving 1/2 hr away to another dojo is worth every scarifice for a person not getting hurt. That is pretty obvious and is the thing to do.

Last edited by Buck : 04-15-2009 at 09:40 PM.
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Old 04-15-2009, 10:52 PM   #31
Janet Rosen
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Re: Sensei -- drinking??

I refused to train in a class some years ago when I believed the instructor to be under the influence of something and would do it again.
I agree that ideally the entire dojo or at least the most senior students should deal with it openly with the instructor. But if this isn't going to happen, prudence dictates removing yourself from a potentially unsafe training situation.

Janet Rosen
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"peace will enter when hate is gone"--percy mayfield
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Old 04-16-2009, 04:21 AM   #32
"Lisa1978"
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Smile Re: Sensei -- drinking??

just a quick update on what is going on at the dojo. First of all, the sensei is realizing he needs some time to himself and is taking a month off... So that is a step in the right direction. Yes it is everybody's responsibility on the dojo but asking everyone their opinion (instead of perhaps the just the senior students) would be, in my opinion, rude and hurtful ... (sort of like "A giant conversation going on at the dojo about the sensei and he is not even aware of the conversation") ... I think that remaining more disrete is the best alternative righ now. As it stands, he is taking the month off and hopefully get some stuff sorted out and come back with a clearer head.

Driving to another dojo is a good idea also but there are none close to where I am .... nearest one is about 2 hours away .... but the suggestion was a valid one also.

As far as the sensei interpreting concern for interest, yes I was worried because in the past (when things in his relationship status became rocky ... he did express interest in me and I quite boldly declined) ... so yes, it is a complicated situation ... but I appreciate all suggestions given by others thus far.

Thanks again for all your ideas and suggestions ...

Lisa1978
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Old 04-16-2009, 11:18 AM   #33
Guilty Spark
 
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Re: Sensei -- drinking??

Do you need a man hug Phill?

If you're hungry, keep moving.
If you're tired, keep moving.
If you value you're life, keep moving.

You don't own what you can't defend
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Old 04-16-2009, 01:28 PM   #34
Buck
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Re: Sensei -- drinking??

Darn tootin' I do. I need one of those country redneck "Larry The Cable Guy," (not the "Deliverance" type) man hugs. If I can't get my first choice I will go with an Al Borland-"Tool Time" type of hug.

I am glad things worked out perfect for Lisa1978
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