We all know the Jedi are secretly Aikidoka and Yoda is the code name for O'Sensei. What I want to know is where the hell is my light saber! Look, I'm spending a fortune here between my Dojo dues and testing fees and seminar fees and attending summer camp! I feel I have more than earned my light saber!
I remember VERY CLEARLY the wink and secret wrist handshake I was taught the day I joined "The Force" The disguised code talk about the "wood" bokken and the "dogi" that I was to receive. So far, all I got was this wood sword (actually made of REAL wood for God's sake) and a pair of funny white pajamas, which by the way are cut way too high. They don't even go down to my ankles!
I understood I would be receiving a light saber, a cool cloak, boots and learn the ways of the force. So what did I get? I get a stick, a pair of short pajamas, I'm having to walk barefoot and getting my butt kicked, thrown, twisted, bruised, and other wise manhandled in the most alarming manner.
When I joined the military service my recruiter told me a lot of similar sounding stuff too! Has my recruiter/Sensei deceived me?? Is my equipment in the mail? Has anyone else had mail problems receiving their equipment?
I'm so distressed that I'm even beginning to wonder Did Yoda really exist? Is Yoda still teaching at the temple?
Please, somebody tell me the truth!!