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Old 06-03-2012, 05:56 AM   #1
Mary Eastland
 
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Measuring success

I just read The Mirror for this month. Thank you, Katherine. The part that struck me was the idea of noticing change in one's self.

I have recently noticed in myself a renewed commitment to really paying attention in the moment. To seeing my uke, before, as they strike and then feeling the connection between uke and myself after the strike and during the throw. It seems like my uke becomes almost glowing in those moments of extreme attention. I notice when we are connected and when I am impatient or judgmental and mostly am able to let go without entertaining blame of either of us. So much happens in those few seconds.

Have you noticed and changes in your training and practice?

Mary Eastland

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Old 06-03-2012, 06:35 AM   #2
Mary Eastland
 
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Re: measuring sucess

That should read:

Have you noticed any changes in your training and practice?

Mary Eastland

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Old 06-03-2012, 09:35 AM   #3
Dan Richards
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Re: measuring sucess

When I stopped measuring, and dividing, and separating.

When I understood the answer to the question, "How long is the coastline of England?" I realized that measuring is an infinite loop of tail chasing. So, I stopped.

I noticed a transformation when I realized there no longer was, nor was there ever - an uke.

That sort of, "I am the universe." stuff. "I and the father are one."

Last edited by Dan Richards : 06-03-2012 at 09:38 AM.
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Old 06-03-2012, 11:15 AM   #4
Chris Parkerson
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Re: measuring sucess

I love this question as there are so many angles to it. While I agree with Dan's experience, we all return to differentiation on a regular basis. Defining things from time to time reminds me that words themselves measure things by definition.

How do you measure success if you:
1) practice aikido with a third leg (a wooden crutch). One of my favorite aikido teachers in Columbus, Ohio has this challenge/gift.
2) face a daily challenge of being in your body. I once had a private kenpo student who literally could not remember the simplest technique from week to week. I grimaced each private session he bought, wanting not to waste my precious time with him. I spoke with Master Brian Adams about it and my perspective was changed. My time with this guy assisted him in connecting to his body. This was one of my greatest successes once I really observed it outside of my own agendas.

I could go on and on....

Last edited by Chris Parkerson : 06-03-2012 at 11:17 AM.
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Old 06-03-2012, 02:43 PM   #5
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Re: measuring sucess

It seems like I never notice changes until I realize that they happened somewhere back there. It's sort of like driving in an unfamiliar town in Massachusetts: "Oh yeah, that street/landmark/milestone I was looking for, I guess I already passed that a while ago."

Journaling effectively is tough. So is self-reflection. In both cases, it's too easy to become self-conscious and to fall in to a writing style that projects your idealized self-image, or the person that you'd like to be, or the edited version of yourself that you consider acceptable for public consumption. I think Katherine's recommendation to keep the journal private is important, but you can lose your authentic voice even in private writings. Staying in touch with yourself and your changes is one of the valuable functions of a journal, but to accomplish that, you have to stay honest -- and staying honest, consistently, is a hard thing to do. One thing that helps is to cut yourself some slack for not thinking noble thoughts every second or having epiphanies every day. Be patient: with yourself, with your situation, with your progress. I used to work in a resort where entitled yuppies would routinely declare, with an immense air of self-righteousness, "Well, that's just not acceptable!" -- usually about something that was beyond anybody's control. Yes, well, the lifts are not running, because the wind is blowing 50 MPH, and so you're not going skiing today, and you can find that "not acceptable" if you want, but the "that" in question is reality, and reality doesn't change because you refuse to accept it. The wind will die down when it dies down. What does any of that have to do with changes happening on the mat? Well, as I said, I usually notice them in the rearview mirror -- probably because I'm not looking for them. All things considered, I think that's probably for the best.
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Old 06-03-2012, 03:51 PM   #6
hughrbeyer
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Re: measuring sucess

Quote:
Mary Malmros wrote: View Post
I used to work in a resort where entitled yuppies would routinely declare, with an immense air of self-righteousness, "Well, that's just not acceptable!" -- usually about something that was beyond anybody's control. Yes, well, the lifts are not running, because the wind is blowing 50 MPH, and so you're not going skiing today, and you can find that "not acceptable" if you want, but the "that" in question is reality, and reality doesn't change because you refuse to accept it. The wind will die down when it dies down.
LOL. My son has worked as a liftie, and while he hasn't come home with quite that story I sure recognize the situation.

Quote:
Chris Parkerson wrote: View Post
...practice aikido with a third leg (a wooden crutch). One of my favorite aikido teachers in Columbus, Ohio has this challenge/gift.
You talking about my former sensei? Tomiki Aikido? Used to take ukemi for his students regularly. The first time you threw kotegaishi on him he'd look you in the eye and say, "Keep your back straight!" When you heard that club whistling by your ear you'd know why.

I don't think he ever had a problem measuring success. While I was with him he got on to Wally Jay's Small Circle Aikido and treated us all to a range of finger lock techniques. "Look--you can't keep it on for more than a second because then uke habituates to it, so you have to keep changing." "Thanks Sensei, ouch--ouch--thanks Sensei--ouch--ouch"

Me, I alternate between being Superman and being the klutz who can't do anything right. I've gotten to the point where I look forward to the klutz phase, because then at least you know what you're supposed to be working on. When you're Superman, it's easy to get lost.

Today's posting brought ot you by Sam Adams Double Bock. Not responsible for the contents.
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Old 06-03-2012, 05:56 PM   #7
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Re: measuring sucess

Quote:
Hugh Beyer wrote: View Post
LOL. My son has worked as a liftie, and while he hasn't come home with quite that story I sure recognize the situation.
Heh, I'll bet you do! And as irritating as the situation is when you're in it, I would not trade the lessons it has taught me for anything.

Quote:
Hugh Beyer wrote: View Post
Me, I alternate between being Superman and being the klutz who can't do anything right. I've gotten to the point where I look forward to the klutz phase, because then at least you know what you're supposed to be working on. When you're Superman, it's easy to get lost.
Yeah...maybe because we expect it to continue, or we want it to be our normal state? It's natural enough to desire to be at the summit, but to be at peace with the valley and the long slog up...that's ultimately what gets us through.

My biggest success in aikido -- and I don't expect this to ever change, no matter how long I train -- was to be the person who kept trying.

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Hugh Beyer wrote: View Post
Today's posting brought ot you by Sam Adams Double Bock. Not responsible for the contents.
This evening's posting brought to you by Berkshire Brewing Company Steel Rail Pail Ale. Not responsible for anything!
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Old 06-03-2012, 08:26 PM   #8
Chris Parkerson
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Re: Measuring success

Hugh,

You wrote
"You talking about my former sensei? Tomiki Aikido? Used to take ukemi for his students regularly. The first time you threw kotegaishi on him he'd look you in the eye and say, "Keep your back straight!" When you heard that club whistling by your ear you'd know why."

Yes. That's him. From the get-go he had to measure his success, not by how well he could mimic his sensei's movements, but how he could creatively find similar results using his own distinct assets. Thus he will often use his crutch to accomplish an effect when he cannot place his body where others could.
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Old 06-03-2012, 09:03 PM   #9
hughrbeyer
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Re: Measuring success

That's right. He had a set of pins which involved planting that crutch in the mat and wrapping your arm around it like a noodle. Got your attention in a hurry.

That's it for me today, off to research Steel Rail Pail Ale...
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Old 06-03-2012, 10:21 PM   #10
Janet Rosen
 
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Re: measuring sucess

Quote:
Chris Parkerson wrote: View Post
I once had a private kenpo student who literally could not remember the simplest technique from week to week. I grimaced each private session he bought, wanting not to waste my precious time with him. I spoke with Master Brian Adams about it and my perspective was changed. My time with this guy assisted him in connecting to his body. This was one of my greatest successes once I really observed it outside of my own agendas.
To me THAT is the crux of it: not being attached to a particular outcome, whether it is within the specific encounter ("I must do kotegaishe and I must throw my partner!") or within the realm of what I think I'll be focusing on myself in a particular class. I may bow in thinking, well I'd like to play with weighting tonight, and find that either what the instructor is presenting us with or a particular training partner's issues just isn't conducive to my "plan."
And like you, it was very much brought home when my late teacher had me work 1:1 - in my case, with an autistic, pretty out of his body teen during the few classes he showed up. Simply having him model the body movement I was doing was a huge success. I was able to read, and have him confirm, that touching a partner was way out of his comfort range. So we just worked on movement and mirroring.

Janet Rosen
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"peace will enter when hate is gone"--percy mayfield
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Old 06-04-2012, 10:17 AM   #11
Dan Richards
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Re: measuring sucess

Quote:
Mary Malmros wrote: View Post
Yeah...maybe because we expect it to continue, or we want it to be our normal state? It's natural enough to desire to be at the summit, but to be at peace with the valley and the long slog up...that's ultimately what gets us through.

My biggest success in aikido -- and I don't expect this to ever change, no matter how long I train -- was to be the person who kept trying.
Mary, why is the summit anymore desirable than the valley, or any other place on the mountain. Does there have to be a mountain at all? Maybe it could be a brewery or a field full of marshmellows.

Do you ever see a day when you are no longer "training" and "trying," but simply being and doing - with no peaks and no valleys - just experiencing and witnessing an eternal joyous flow...

If aikido means something along the lines of "the way to harmony with spirit," or "your relationship with spirit/god," then wouldn't it make sense that at some point you realize that when you allow spirit to express through your less-to-non-resistant body/mind, that you are witnessing and manifesting spirit/god.

Enlightening article about energy and faith... http://www.pastornet.net.au/response/articles/133.htm

This morning's posting brought to you by Cafe Bustello espresso.
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Old 06-04-2012, 11:22 AM   #12
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Re: measuring sucess

Quote:
Dan Richards wrote: View Post
Do you ever see a day when you are no longer "training" and "trying," but simply being and doing - with no peaks and no valleys - just experiencing and witnessing an eternal joyous flow...
"eternal joyous flow", ha. I have rheumatoid arthritis. Right now I'm doing pretty well with it. Statistically, that won't last. For people with rheumatoid arthritis, what you call "simply being and doing" is training and trying. That's something that healthy people just don't get. You make your plans and your goals -- or, alternately, you experience some epiphany that takes you beyond wanting or needing plans and goals. Either way, you have the choice. I live in a different world, that's all.

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Dan Richards wrote: View Post
If aikido means something along the lines of "the way to harmony with spirit," or "your relationship with spirit/god," then wouldn't it make sense that at some point you realize that when you allow spirit to express through your less-to-non-resistant body/mind, that you are witnessing and manifesting spirit/god.
"spirit", whatever that is, doesn't make it possible to walk. No amount of "harmony" makes it possible to walk.

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Dan Richards wrote: View Post
Enlightening article about energy and faith... http://www.pastornet.net.au/response/articles/133.htm
I skimmed it. It's not relevant, I don't think. FWIW, my sister sent me John Paul II's letter on suffering because she thought for some reason that would be helpful. Well, yeah, you'd think that a guy who got gut-shot would have some valuable insights on the subject, but from where I'm standing, he missed the whole point.
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Old 06-04-2012, 12:05 PM   #13
Dan Richards
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Re: Measuring success

Mary, if you're doing "well" then you are tapping into spirit. That's what "well" means. Statistically? Who's statics? Who's the authority? Who convinced you that you don't have a choice?

If you "have" arthritis, then you can also not have it. It's like anything else. Do you want to carry all the luggage, or put it down? You do have a choice. Many people you might call "healthy" have not always been healthy. But at some point they did make a choice - to be well. That is "being." And if you're actions spring from wellbeing, wellness is the result.

WIth arthritis, people set up a nice big bundle of resistance. The beautiful thing is, when they decide to let go of the resistance - which is the goal of aikido, anyway - they become well and an inspiration to others. One way to look at the root cause of arthritis is "Feeling unloved, criticism, resentment"
http://www.squidoo.com/spiritualmeaning#module14827352

>> "No amount of "harmony" makes it possible to walk."

If you say so...
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bIXOo8D9Qsc
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Old 06-04-2012, 01:23 PM   #14
Keith Larman
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Re: Measuring success

Had a well-meaning young fellow tell me that the pain I was experiencing was "just in my mind". Very spiritual guy. My reply was that he could stuff it up his smug tailpipe -- the pain was my greatly narrowing lumbar spine squeezing down on multiple nerve bundles... Something I've dealt with almost daily for years. And if it's all in my mind I'd be happy to hit him a few times in the spine with a baseball bat and *then* he can tell me all about it being "just in my mind".

A few weeks later I saw him sitting out because he had a minor headache. I didn't bother going over and suggesting that it was all in his head and that he should just ignore it. Although I did get up close to him and loudly ask how he was feeling, hoping it was a migraine... "DO LOUD NOISES HURT TOO?!?!?! HERE LOOK IN TO THE HIGH INTENSITY FLASHLIGHT. DOES THAT HURT? YOU KNOW YOU CAN CHOOSE TO IGNORE THE PAIN!"

In all seriousness, sure, there is an approach that those of us who suffer from chronic pain and/or disease have to adopt in order to cope. But in my experience most of the folk who are so easy with the advice about "just letting it go" haven't dealt with years of debilitating pain. Yeah, just getting on with things is about the only choice. It's not like you have any other. But I promptly shut my mouth the moment someone I know who has chronic pain or disease who decides to sit out. I just smile, shake their hand, and say "Please, by all means. Take care of yourself."

My measure of success? That I can still train and/or teach sometimes. Even with the pain.

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Old 06-04-2012, 01:47 PM   #15
Janet Rosen
 
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Re: Measuring success

Quote:
Dan Richards wrote: View Post
If you "have" arthritis, then you can also not have it. It's like anything else.
I'm sorry, but to say that a person with arthritis or cancer or whatever can decide to not have it flies in the face of reality.
Yes: we have the power to alter our attitudes and our daily habits. Via those changes, we can and do modulate our immune and neurological systems. And in some cases, diabetes or heart disease, for instance, can be reversed via a specific regimen. But much more typically, the changes in function for the better do not make an underlying disease go away; they let us live better with it.

Talk about blaming the victim...

Janet Rosen
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"peace will enter when hate is gone"--percy mayfield
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Old 06-04-2012, 01:50 PM   #16
Janet Rosen
 
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Re: Measuring success

Quote:
Keith Larman wrote: View Post
In all seriousness, sure, there is an approach that those of us who suffer from chronic pain and/or disease have to adopt in order to cope. But in my experience most of the folk who are so easy with the advice about "just letting it go" haven't dealt with years of debilitating pain. Yeah, just getting on with things is about the only choice. It's not like you have any other. But I promptly shut my mouth the moment someone I know who has chronic pain or disease who decides to sit out. I just smile, shake their hand, and say "Please, by all means. Take care of yourself."
My measure of success? That I can still train and/or teach sometimes. Even with the pain.
Yep. There is a difference between finding best mental and physical practices and thinking one can "will" something away. In fact, in my experience, accepting the reality of its existence is a huge part of letting go of anxiety, letting go of stuff that feeds its power by setting it up as "the other" and by accepting the reality and intgrating it, one better copes with it. LIke accepting and breathing into a nikkyo vs. fighting it or pretending it doesn't exist.

Janet Rosen
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"peace will enter when hate is gone"--percy mayfield
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Old 06-04-2012, 02:08 PM   #17
Diana Frese
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Re: Measuring success

Just chiming in before studying the posts in detail, as they are very valuable. Mary mentioned in her OP about being in the moment, and Francis kindly mentioned this in a comment to my blog post, so that's two people making the same point and I am remembering to check myself on that from time to time.

Fortunately I have learned to, at least sometimes, take advantage of an opportunity. I mentioned dropping into Ray's dojo early morning class even though I had just gi and no hakama, when my husband decided to try aikido again. Then other things in daily life and work intervened but at least I grabbed the opportunity twice.

Which brings me to injuries. For goodness sake don't injure yourselves. Tell the instructor, tell your partner and work around whatever the problem is. I did and had a marvelous time practicing with the friendly blurs once I took my glasses off. Even without rolling or falling. They adapted to me! Yes arthritis and spine stuff is real. I am so grateful I don't have much pain if I remember to be careful.

As an older person, if anyone wants advice, it is be careful and enjoy whatever you CAN do

I could go on, but this is just to say hi, great thread and thanks to the posters on it.
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Old 06-04-2012, 02:14 PM   #18
Dan Richards
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Re: Measuring success

Quote:
Janet Rosen wrote: View Post
I'm sorry, but to say that a person with arthritis or cancer or whatever can decide to not have it flies in the face of reality. .
Who's "reality," Janet?

Quote:
Talk about blaming the victim...
Victim? I don't see any victims here. There are an infinite number of "realities" that do not contain "victims." There are an infinite number of realities where people (not victims) move away from disease - cancer, diabetes, arthritis (or whatever label you choose to put on resistance) - permanently. I've seen it too many times. I've experienced it in my own life.

Sorry, but words like "victim" and "blame" really aren't part of my vocabulary. "Compassion" certainly is. And I agree with Keith's, "Please, by all means. Take care of yourself." That is hugely profound.

Last edited by Dan Richards : 06-04-2012 at 02:17 PM.
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Old 06-04-2012, 02:29 PM   #19
Keith Larman
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Re: Measuring success

I sincerely hope you never get something you can't fix with a healthy attitude. But if you do, I sincerely hope you remember what you wrote today.

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Old 06-04-2012, 03:09 PM   #20
Dan Richards
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Re: Measuring success

Keith, where did you ever get the idea about the "healthy attitude?" I never said anything about that. I've been writing about healing.

I'm also not in the it's-all-in-the-mind camp, either. It's not all in the mind. It's also in the physical body and the emotional body.

>> I'd be happy to hit him a few times in the spine with a baseball bat and *then* he can tell me all about it being "just in my mind".

Those are your words, Keith.
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Old 06-04-2012, 03:10 PM   #21
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Re: Measuring success

Dan. I know where you're coming from. Both things are true. Bodies get old etc. vs. the amazing reality of what you say.

Which brings me back to the thread. We have a good joke at our Aikido and we call it the 'Yoda' effect.

I measure this effect as a success also.

All visitors find the atmosphere almost mesmeric and relaxing. Some ask if they can come just to watch and soak up the atmosphere, they say it makes them feel so good.

The 'Yoda' effect as we call it is a physical phenomenon due to the way we do Aikido. People come with all sorts of ailments etc. but once on the mat they disappear. They even do it as a test sometimes. They can be at home with some ailment which bars them from doing Aikido and yet once they arrive and start it disappears.

Myself, being used to what you mention above have turned up with what felt like sciatica or arthritis, being in pain, not being able to even bend to tie my shoelace and yet in my mind I know I don't need drugs or painkillers or two months off, I need Aikido. So I get there and it dissappears. Later when everythings over and everyone's gone home I go back to as I was before. Like yoda turning up with walking stick and all bent up, then turning into a young kid, then, fight over, back to old yoda again.

It is just like putting back on the old clothes.

So the more people realize just how much they themselves can do spiritually to alleviate or help their own conditions is one of my measurements.

Peace.G.
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Old 06-04-2012, 04:07 PM   #22
Chris Parkerson
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Re: Measuring success

Quote:
Keith Larman wrote: View Post
I sincerely hope you never get something you can't fix with a healthy attitude. But if you do, I sincerely hope you remember what you wrote today.
Keith, I feel your pain. I was born with structural issues. I searched out every internal practice and alternative medicine and yoga that I could find and afford. In my 20's, Tai Chi and Chi gung helped open the gate a bit. But now age and genetics are setting in.

My idea of success....
Finding ways to compensate. Ways to get maximum effect. My structural imbalance is a gift that helps me think out of the box.

This week, I have a nasty biceps tendon issue. Time for T-Rex techniques. Small arms; big legs.

Chris
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Old 06-04-2012, 05:34 PM   #23
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Re: Measuring success

"Success comes from knowing that you did your best to become the best that you are capable of becoming."
John Wooden

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Old 06-04-2012, 11:15 PM   #24
Chris Parkerson
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Re: Measuring success

So, I think I figured out what Success is not... You cannot, with all your efforts, get immortality. Not with new age manifestation or ancient rostrums or internal yogas.
We are all in a process of a decomposition that leads to death.

Enkidu dies and Gilgamesh (truly a mighty warrior King) looks for eternal life after watching the event. The gods finally tell him:

"The life that you are seeking you will never find. When the gods created man they allotted to him death, but life they retained in their own keeping

4. As for you, Gilgamesh, let your belly be full,
Make merry day and night.
Of each day make a feast of rejoicing.
Day and night dance and play!
Let your garments be sparkling fresh,
Your head be washed; bathe in water.
Pay heed to a little one that holds on to your hand,
Let a spouse delight in your bosom.
   —Tablet X Gilgamesh Epic.

Now that is success!
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Old 06-05-2012, 07:26 AM   #25
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Re: Measuring success

Quote:
Dan Richards wrote: View Post
Mary, if you're doing "well" then you are tapping into spirit. That's what "well" means. Statistically? Who's statics? Who's the authority? Who convinced you that you don't have a choice?

If you "have" arthritis, then you can also not have it. It's like anything else. Do you want to carry all the luggage, or put it down? You do have a choice. Many people you might call "healthy" have not always been healthy. But at some point they did make a choice - to be well. That is "being." And if you're actions spring from wellbeing, wellness is the result.
Well, that's your opinion, but you know what they say about opinions. It's also true that while you can have your own opinion, you don't get to have your own facts. Your opinion is contrary to the facts. I wish you all joy of it...at least as long as the inconvenient facts don't get up in your face. Who knows, they may never do so. And they may do so tomorrow.

As things stand right now, though, you don't really understand what I'm talking about. You're using some of the same words, sure, but they have different meanings for you. Simple words like "try" have different meaning for someone who experiences an occasional ache and pain, and someone who goes to bed at night not knowing if they'll be able to walk in the morning, or pick up a pencil, or stand upright. They can't help but be different. That's why for me, my enduring measure of success is that I keep training. It's a very personal measure, but then, aren't they all? And isn't that what Mary E was getting at in creating this thread?
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