Welcome to AikiWeb Aikido Information
AikiWeb: The Source for Aikido Information
AikiWeb's principal purpose is to serve the Internet community as a repository and dissemination point for aikido information.

Sections
home
aikido articles
columns

Discussions
forums
aikiblogs

Databases
dojo search
seminars
image gallery
supplies
links directory

Reviews
book reviews
video reviews
dvd reviews
equip. reviews

News
submit
archive

Miscellaneous
newsletter
rss feeds
polls
about

Follow us on



Home > AikiWeb Aikido Forums
Go Back   AikiWeb Aikido Forums > Spiritual

Hello and thank you for visiting AikiWeb, the world's most active online Aikido community! This site is home to over 22,000 aikido practitioners from around the world and covers a wide range of aikido topics including techniques, philosophy, history, humor, beginner issues, the marketplace, and more.

If you wish to join in the discussions or use the other advanced features available, you will need to register first. Registration is absolutely free and takes only a few minutes to complete so sign up today!

Reply
 
Thread Tools
Old 08-14-2003, 07:16 AM   #1
one4k4
Location: Connecticut
Join Date: Oct 2002
Posts: 37
Offline
Ai symbol A lesson learned..

I'm posting this to "spiritual" forum but I'm not 100% sure this is the proper location for it.

That aside, it's been a long time since I've posted here. Too long.

I am doing well though, have had some "seperation anxiety" problems I am seeing a doctor for, as far as the "abridged version" goes.

Throughout this time of three months or so, I have been missing Aikido practice, but have been feeling like I was still connected and living the spiritual side of the art. Trying my best to keep my emotions in check, and trying to redirect anger, frustration, anxiety, and depression towards healthier goals has been something I was pretty good at doing. Until Tuesday night.

I met up with my ex and she had our dog there. That upset me to no end, as she said I couldn't see him, because I was crazy, etc. I'll not get into details details, but basically, I stormed into the apartment to hug my dog and she was trying to restrain me. Nails in my arms, hands on my wrists.. bear hug from behind, and the wo other people there tried to hold me as well. I switched into Randori mode, and my ex was on the floor with a sore wrist, the other woman was behind my ex as the ex was tossed into her. The large man couldn't keep ahold of me, and he only recieved a bruised ego.

An hour later, back at home, I was arrested. Out on bail a few hours later, and yesterday in court I was told that I need to keep seeing my doctor and he needs to write a letter to the court and things will be nullied. (spelling?)

I feel like I failed, basically. I should have seen the emotions rise, and stopped there, wrote a lengthy letter and not mailed it, or just went for a walk in the woods. (Something that helps me calm down..)

What are your thoughts?

Again, hi everybody! I'm going to read-up on the post I've missed, and try to get some work done this week.

*sigh*

-Thomas
  Reply With Quote
Old 08-14-2003, 08:42 AM   #2
SeiserL
 
SeiserL's Avatar
Location: Florida Gulf coast
Join Date: Jun 2000
Posts: 3,902
United_States
Offline
Sorry for the situation. Sounds painful all around.

IMHO, practicing the spirtual side of Aikido may not be as expedient as getting some competent counseling for your separation anxiety and anger management.

Failure only shows us where we need to practice more. Sometime our practice is how to get out of our own way mentally and emotionally. Remember, where ever the head goes the body tends to follow.

Learn to accept and flow with what is.

Compassion to all involved.

Lynn Seiser PhD
Yondan Aikido & FMA/JKD
We do not rise to the level of our expectations, but fall to the level of our training. Train well. KWATZ!
  Reply With Quote
Old 08-14-2003, 08:52 AM   #3
Ron Tisdale
Dojo: Doshinkan dojo in Roxborough, Pa
Location: Phila. Pa
Join Date: Jun 2002
Posts: 4,615
United_States
Offline
Stay away from people who obviously enjoy manipulating your emotions, and enlisting others to support same.

Adopt a new dog from the spca (I still miss all of my pets that have crossed the bridge).

Live well. Its the best revenge.

Ron

Ron Tisdale
-----------------------
"The higher a monkey climbs, the more you see of his behind."
St. Bonaventure (ca. 1221-1274)
  Reply With Quote
Old 08-14-2003, 08:55 AM   #4
one4k4
Location: Connecticut
Join Date: Oct 2002
Posts: 37
Offline
That concept of living well is absoutley what was on my mind this entire time.

I thank you two for your replies, as you've confirmed what I was thinking all along..

Oh, and petfinder.org is a great place to find pets!
  Reply With Quote
Old 08-14-2003, 09:31 AM   #5
Nancy Mathews
Dojo: UC Davis Aikikai
Location: Davis, Ca
Join Date: Aug 2003
Posts: 3
Offline
Wink i agree completely

i agree completely with all advice given so far.

get some counseling or therapy. going to a psychiatrist was the best thing i did when faced with similar problems in my own life.

one more word: take a moment to find a good psychiatrist, or counselor, or support group, whichever route you take; don't expect that your first avenue will automatically be the best choice for you, and be willing to make changes. sometimes it takes a while to find the right path and the right people to help you, but it is definitely worth it.

good luck !
  Reply With Quote
Old 08-15-2003, 08:31 AM   #6
jxa127
Location: Harrisburg, PA
Join Date: Jul 2000
Posts: 420
Offline
One thing I'd add is to get a copy of "The Magic of Conflict" by Thomas Crum. It takes an aikido-based approach to dealing with conflict. It's made a real impression on me.

Regards,

-Drew

----
-Drew Ames
  Reply With Quote

Reply


Currently Active Users Viewing This Thread: 1 (0 members and 1 guests)
 
Thread Tools

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

vB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off

Similar Threads
Thread Thread Starter Forum Replies Last Post
First lesson arjandevries General 5 08-29-2006 02:10 PM
Finally... My 1st Aikido lesson (Advice) Stethomas General 22 11-16-2004 07:16 AM
A labor-day lesson in ego... disabledaccount General 9 09-08-2004 11:51 AM
The stomach lesson Bruce Baker General 35 06-05-2002 05:49 PM
A Valuable lesson Aikidoka2000 General 0 05-01-2001 09:45 AM


All times are GMT -6. The time now is 08:05 AM.



vBulletin Copyright © 2000-2024 Jelsoft Enterprises Limited
----------
Copyright 1997-2024 AikiWeb and its Authors, All Rights Reserved.
----------
For questions and comments about this website:
Send E-mail
plainlaid-picaresque outchasing-protistan explicantia-altarage seaford-stellionate