Welcome to AikiWeb Aikido Information
AikiWeb: The Source for Aikido Information
AikiWeb's principal purpose is to serve the Internet community as a repository and dissemination point for aikido information.

Sections
home
aikido articles
columns

Discussions
forums
aikiblogs

Databases
dojo search
seminars
image gallery
supplies
links directory

Reviews
book reviews
video reviews
dvd reviews
equip. reviews

News
submit
archive

Miscellaneous
newsletter
rss feeds
polls
about

Follow us on



Home > AikiWeb Aikido Forums
Go Back   AikiWeb Aikido Forums > General

Hello and thank you for visiting AikiWeb, the world's most active online Aikido community! This site is home to over 22,000 aikido practitioners from around the world and covers a wide range of aikido topics including techniques, philosophy, history, humor, beginner issues, the marketplace, and more.

If you wish to join in the discussions or use the other advanced features available, you will need to register first. Registration is absolutely free and takes only a few minutes to complete so sign up today!

Reply
 
Thread Tools
Old 03-19-2010, 11:02 AM   #1
trademark8806
 
trademark8806's Avatar
Dojo: Akido of Rosmore
Location: Seal Beach,CA
Join Date: May 2009
Posts: 49
United_States
Offline
To do or not do that is the question... (bringing food in to your dojo)

I was wordring if you guys thogut it a good idea to bring food in to your dojo? Wether it was for after class , like shring with the group or for your self.
I also wondr it it was common for your group to offten partake in sharing of food after class, like going out to eat or something? Do belive this brings your guys closser together?
On a slightly difrent note, I also wonderin if it was better to have a "frined" relnship with your fellow members or to keep you distance, what do you guys think?

Best wishes ,
  Reply With Quote
Old 03-19-2010, 12:10 PM   #2
Russ Q
Dojo: Shohei Juku Aikido Gibsons
Location: Gibsons BC
Join Date: Dec 2008
Posts: 192
Canada
Offline
Re: To do or not do that is the question... (bringing food in to your dojo)

Hi Tara,

We often enjoyed tea and fruit after class (mostly on weekends) at my home dojo. This was a chance to relax with sensei and "shoot the shit". It's somehow nice to be sipping tea with your teacher and/or sempai as you settle after class - kinda intimate in a way.....

As for friendships in the dojo: of course you can make friends. My personal experience has been to keep in mind aikido will be a lifelong practice. Therefore I develop dojo friendships slowly.....and mostly within the spectrum of the dojo (social events etc.). To each their own though.

Cheers,

Russ
  Reply With Quote
Old 03-19-2010, 12:21 PM   #3
Adam Huss
 
Adam Huss's Avatar
Location: Ohio
Join Date: Jun 2005
Posts: 710
United_States
Offline
Re: To do or not do that is the question... (bringing food in to your dojo)

We occasionally do socials after seminars. We have a seminar coming up in may where we will order pizza or Chinese food after the Friday night class and have a social event (Sat. night being the mandatory 'going out for sushi' event).

As for friends: it's pretty hard to train with people for ten years..someone who obviously has a similar, yet unique, interest as you and not become friends. Now as far as dojo relationships go...that is a pretty big slippery slope. They usually end with one of the two people leaving the dojo...or marriage.

Ichi Go, Ichi Ei!
  Reply With Quote
Old 03-19-2010, 12:24 PM   #4
mickeygelum
 
mickeygelum's Avatar
Dojo: Warren Budokan, Ohio USA
Location: Youngstown, Ohio
Join Date: Aug 2005
Posts: 502
United_States
Offline
Re: To do or not do that is the question... (bringing food in to your dojo)

Greetings Ms Marsh,

I have a kitchen in my dojo...and I am a hanshi in the culinary arts..

There is nothing more satisfying and intimate as a meal shared amongst friends and family...

Train well,

Mickey
  Reply With Quote
Old 03-19-2010, 12:54 PM   #5
trademark8806
 
trademark8806's Avatar
Dojo: Akido of Rosmore
Location: Seal Beach,CA
Join Date: May 2009
Posts: 49
United_States
Offline
Re: To do or not do that is the question... (bringing food in to your dojo)

Quote:
Adam Huss wrote: View Post
We occasionally do socials after seminars. We have a seminar coming up in may where we will order pizza or Chinese food after the Friday night class and have a social event (Sat. night being the mandatory 'going out for sushi' event).

As for friends: it's pretty hard to train with people for ten years..someone who obviously has a similar, yet unique, interest as you and not become friends. Now as far as dojo relationships go...that is a pretty big slippery slope. They usually end with one of the two people leaving the dojo...or marriage.
I was mostly refuring to friend ship in genral nor the other way.

Best wishes ,
  Reply With Quote
Old 03-19-2010, 01:25 PM   #6
Rob Watson
Location: CA
Join Date: Sep 2005
Posts: 697
United_States
Offline
Re: To do or not do that is the question... (bringing food in to your dojo)

Quote:
Adam Huss wrote: View Post
we will order pizza or Chinese food
We are strongly urged to bring home cooked food for our visitors after seminars.

The uchideshi (live in students) often have few options besides cooking in the dojo (there are some local eateries close by but money is tight). Any extra food is heartily welcomed unless it is my (in)famous wild mushroom succotash...

Usually folks have busy lives to get back to after training, so few, if any 'hang out' after class. Any lingerers are usually looking for some jiyukeiko (free practice) not snacks.

Long timers will get together 'offline'.

Last year we had some troubles with local low lifes commiting break ins so folks were ask to lock up and move along. Things have settled down quite a bit of late. I'm certain sensei would encourage folks to 'socialize' if they want (best to ask first).

"In my opinion, the time of spreading aikido to the world is finished; now we have to focus on quality." Yamada Yoshimitsu

Ultracrepidarianism ... don't.
  Reply With Quote
Old 03-19-2010, 03:23 PM   #7
ninjaqutie
 
ninjaqutie's Avatar
Dojo: Searching for a new home
Location: Delaware (<3 still in Oregon!)
Join Date: Apr 2009
Posts: 1,004
United_States
Offline
Re: To do or not do that is the question... (bringing food in to your dojo)

No food in our dojo unless we are having a social gathering, in which a tarp is laid down and covers all the mats. Water or a sports drink is allowed inside, but is kept in the back of the room and isn't allowed on the mats either. You can however eat downstairs anytime you want.

~Look into the eyes of your opponent & steal his spirit.
~To be a good martial artist is to be good thief; if you want my knowledge, you must take it from me.
  Reply With Quote
Old 03-19-2010, 04:21 PM   #8
David Maidment
Join Date: Aug 2008
Posts: 149
United Nations
Offline
Re: To do or not do that is the question... (bringing food in to your dojo)

We have a Chinese restaurant about ten feet away from our dojo, so there have been occasions when we've gathered around a plate of greasy food off the mat.

A small group of us usually go out to a local pub after training, but a lot of people also just clear off and go home. There are a couple of people I train with who I've also become really good friends with in 'real life', as it were.
  Reply With Quote
Old 03-19-2010, 06:08 PM   #9
Adam Huss
 
Adam Huss's Avatar
Location: Ohio
Join Date: Jun 2005
Posts: 710
United_States
Offline
Re: To do or not do that is the question... (bringing food in to your dojo)

Quote:
Ashley Carter wrote: View Post
No food in our dojo unless we are having a social gathering, in which a tarp is laid down and covers all the mats. Water or a sports drink is allowed inside, but is kept in the back of the room and isn't allowed on the mats either. You can however eat downstairs anytime you want.
Right, people don't bring snacks into the dojo for after class, but after a seminar we may have have food brought in (vice everyone going out every night after a seminar...which happens for the bigger ones). We usually set up tables (not on the mat) as we have a pretty decent amount of room.

We also usually have pizza, homemade beer, and sake after O'Soji.

Ichi Go, Ichi Ei!
  Reply With Quote
Old 03-19-2010, 06:32 PM   #10
Ketsan
Dojo: Zanshin Kai
Location: Birmingham
Join Date: Feb 2005
Posts: 865
United Kingdom
Offline
Re: To do or not do that is the question... (bringing food in to your dojo)

Quote:
Tara Marsh wrote: View Post
I was wordring if you guys thogut it a good idea to bring food in to your dojo? Wether it was for after class , like shring with the group or for your self.
I also wondr it it was common for your group to offten partake in sharing of food after class, like going out to eat or something? Do belive this brings your guys closser together?
On a slightly difrent note, I also wonderin if it was better to have a "frined" relnship with your fellow members or to keep you distance, what do you guys think?
There's kinda two groups in our dojo and the two groups get on really well; there's a real family feeling to our dojo.

The three seniors and a few other people from the dojo basically live in each others pockets. We're very tight knit, we all went to sixth form college and university together, we train together, in some cases work and live together. Of course that means we all drink together after training and on weekends and such. We often play paintball together. Feels like being in a small, ill disciplined, badly structured but still very dedicated army unit sometimes.

I think this works really well, I'm closer to my dojo than I am to my family, I see them more often, have more in common with them etc. Communication can often be, rather frank, without anyone taking any offense. Which helps; people will turn around to me and tell me that what I'm doing isn't throwing them and I do the same for them.
They're the only people in the world I can say what I like as bluntly as I like and it's taken calmly and vice versa.

If I have a problem, no matter what it is I spit it out and it gets sorted. My Aikido friends can read me like a book, I can't hide anything from them. If somethings wrong, if my depression is kicking in, I know for a fact that I can hide it from my family but the moment I step in the dojo someone will take one look at me and ask me what's wrong.

If Aikido is about connection there's tons of Aikido where I train. I once joked that we are like a disfunctional family and someone said "actually we function better than most families" and I think he was right. That's not to say we don't have friction and issues but we just deal with it.

So I say get as close to the people you train with as you can. I think one thing O-Sensei was getting at is that as humans we've become very detached from each other and that this is very unhealthy. I think we're fortunate in that we daily place ourselves in the hands of others on a physical level and if you can get to the stage where you can do the same on a psychological level the rewards are immense.

I no longer have friends that do not train, but when friends of mine who used not to train started training I found that the relationship almost immediately became much deeper and much more solid.

As for the food thing I think people should share a meal wherever possible. I think there's something deeply significant about sharing a meal.
  Reply With Quote
Old 03-19-2010, 11:00 PM   #11
trademark8806
 
trademark8806's Avatar
Dojo: Akido of Rosmore
Location: Seal Beach,CA
Join Date: May 2009
Posts: 49
United_States
Offline
Re: To do or not do that is the question... (bringing food in to your dojo)

Quote:
Alex Lawrence wrote: View Post
There's kinda two groups in our dojo and the two groups get on really well; there's a real family feeling to our dojo.

The three seniors and a few other people from the dojo basically live in each others pockets. We're very tight knit, we all went to sixth form college and university together, we train together, in some cases work and live together. Of course that means we all drink together after training and on weekends and such. We often play paintball together. Feels like being in a small, ill disciplined, badly structured but still very dedicated army unit sometimes.

I think this works really well, I'm closer to my dojo than I am to my family, I see them more often, have more in common with them etc. Communication can often be, rather frank, without anyone taking any offense. Which helps; people will turn around to me and tell me that what I'm doing isn't throwing them and I do the same for them.
They're the only people in the world I can say what I like as bluntly as I like and it's taken calmly and vice versa.

If I have a problem, no matter what it is I spit it out and it gets sorted. My Aikido friends can read me like a book, I can't hide anything from them. If somethings wrong, if my depression is kicking in, I know for a fact that I can hide it from my family but the moment I step in the dojo someone will take one look at me and ask me what's wrong.

If Aikido is about connection there's tons of Aikido where I train. I once joked that we are like a disfunctional family and someone said "actually we function better than most families" and I think he was right. That's not to say we don't have friction and issues but we just deal with it.

So I say get as close to the people you train with as you can. I think one thing O-Sensei was getting at is that as humans we've become very detached from each other and that this is very unhealthy. I think we're fortunate in that we daily place ourselves in the hands of others on a physical level and if you can get to the stage where you can do the same on a psychological level the rewards are immense.

I no longer have friends that do not train, but when friends of mine who used not to train started training I found that the relationship almost immediately became much deeper and much more solid.

As for the food thing I think people should share a meal wherever possible. I think there's something deeply significant about sharing a meal.
It is intresting that you talk of the conection alomost on deepter level to your Aido people( akiy or whatever they are called). I worte in my blog that I feel connced more to aikido parternes and to aikido I suppose then I do to many other people. Some told me that Aikdo in of its self lends its self to this and Like you were saying, its a trust things and deeper almost. In my short time I noticed this as well.

Best wishes ,
  Reply With Quote
Old 03-19-2010, 11:04 PM   #12
Linda Eskin
 
Linda Eskin's Avatar
Dojo: Aikido of San Diego, San Diego, California
Location: San Diego County, California
Join Date: May 2009
Posts: 335
United_States
Offline
Re: To do or not do that is the question... (bringing food in to your dojo)

People have brought homemade treats in (like brownies or cookies) to share after class. Very informal - not particularly hanging out, like "hey, there's a plate of cookies on the desk. Please have one." Sometimes people have also brought home grown fruits or vegetables for everyone to take a few home.

I would suggest that you ask first about bringing food, just in case there's a "no food in the dojo" rule or something. But I'm guessing it would be welcomed.

People do get together in groups to go out after class sometimes, and we usually go out as a big group after tests. We also have a big Spring picnic, and few potlucks throughout the year.

There are all sorts of friendships at our dojo, from just being friendly on the mat, to hanging out on weekends, to married couples.

Linda Eskin - Facebook | My Aikido blog: Grab My Wrist

"Heaven is right where you are standing, and that is the place to train." - Morihei Ueshiba
  Reply With Quote
Old 03-19-2010, 11:33 PM   #13
Amassus
 
Amassus's Avatar
Dojo: Aikido Musubi Ryu/ Yoshin Wadokan
Location: Hamilton
Join Date: Aug 2003
Posts: 306
New Zealand
Offline
Re: To do or not do that is the question... (bringing food in to your dojo)

We will go out after a shodan grading to celebrate at a nearby eatery. Sometimes someone will bring in home-made food but this is more rare.

As for friendships? I'm not that social myself so tend to come to the dojo, train, then go home again. I have a young family they are foremost in my mind.

I have made friends at the dojo but they have since stopped training and were my seniors before I entered the club. I also have a good relationship with my sensei outside of the training.

"flows like water, reflects like a mirror, and responds like an echo." Chaung-tse
  Reply With Quote
Old 03-20-2010, 12:15 AM   #14
trademark8806
 
trademark8806's Avatar
Dojo: Akido of Rosmore
Location: Seal Beach,CA
Join Date: May 2009
Posts: 49
United_States
Offline
Re: To do or not do that is the question... (bringing food in to your dojo)

Quote:
Russ Qureshi wrote: View Post
Hi Tara,

We often enjoyed tea and fruit after class (mostly on weekends) at my home dojo. This was a chance to relax with sensei and "shoot the shit". It's somehow nice to be sipping tea with your teacher and/or sempai as you settle after class - kinda intimate in a way.....

As for friendships in the dojo: of course you can make friends. My personal experience has been to keep in mind aikido will be a lifelong practice. Therefore I develop dojo friendships slowly.....and mostly within the spectrum of the dojo (social events etc.). To each their own though.

Cheers,

Russ
ty for replying, so aikido is a more like club then a class or more like a orgnization.

Best wishes ,
  Reply With Quote
Old 03-20-2010, 12:16 AM   #15
trademark8806
 
trademark8806's Avatar
Dojo: Akido of Rosmore
Location: Seal Beach,CA
Join Date: May 2009
Posts: 49
United_States
Offline
Re: To do or not do that is the question... (bringing food in to your dojo)

Quote:
David Maidment wrote: View Post
We have a Chinese restaurant about ten feet away from our dojo, so there have been occasions when we've gathered around a plate of greasy food off the mat.

A small group of us usually go out to a local pub after training, but a lot of people also just clear off and go home. There are a couple of people I train with who I've also become really good friends with in 'real life', as it were.
Is Aikido not realy life?

Best wishes ,
  Reply With Quote
Old 03-20-2010, 12:18 AM   #16
trademark8806
 
trademark8806's Avatar
Dojo: Akido of Rosmore
Location: Seal Beach,CA
Join Date: May 2009
Posts: 49
United_States
Offline
Re: To do or not do that is the question... (bringing food in to your dojo)

ty all for replying and giving your thoughts to my questions.

Best wishes ,
  Reply With Quote
Old 03-20-2010, 05:18 AM   #17
David Maidment
Join Date: Aug 2008
Posts: 149
United Nations
Offline
Re: To do or not do that is the question... (bringing food in to your dojo)

Quote:
Tara Marsh wrote: View Post
Is Aikido not realy life?
Sure. It's my whole life. But other people seem to view it as just some spare-time hobby of mine that I might do to get away from the 'real world' (and in that respect it works very well).

What I mean to say is that there are people at the dojo who I can spend time with and not have the conversation have to be about Aikido. That I do find a rarity; I get on well with almost everyone at the dojo, but with most of them the bond is over Aikido -- I don't think half of us would really be friends if we met in the work place or out and about.
  Reply With Quote
Old 03-20-2010, 08:50 AM   #18
Russ Q
Dojo: Shohei Juku Aikido Gibsons
Location: Gibsons BC
Join Date: Dec 2008
Posts: 192
Canada
Offline
Re: To do or not do that is the question... (bringing food in to your dojo)

Quote:
ty for replying, so aikido is a more like club then a class or more like a orgnization
Didn't say that....:-) In our dojo it is almost exclusively about the training but there are social elements. Some folks enjoy the social aspect (maybe too much....but that's another thread) and some folks don't bother with it at all....depends.
  Reply With Quote
Old 03-20-2010, 07:01 PM   #19
lbb
Location: Massachusetts
Join Date: Jun 2006
Posts: 3,202
United_States
Offline
Re: To do or not do that is the question... (bringing food in to your dojo)

Quote:
Tara Marsh wrote: View Post
ty for replying, so aikido is a more like club then a class or more like a orgnization.
What you're asking about isn't "aikido", but the social milieu of dojos, and that isn't "more like" or "less like" anything -- each dojo is different.
  Reply With Quote
Old 03-21-2010, 06:14 PM   #20
Anidan
Dojo: Aikido Kenkyu Kai, AIS, Belconnen
Location: Canberra, ACT
Join Date: Feb 2001
Posts: 13
Australia
Offline
Re: To do or not do that is the question... (bringing food in to your dojo)

In our dojo after class most of us go for coffee at the nearby cafe. The first time I joined the coffee group I was a little nervous; I was still suffering the 'sensei is so much more than just a person' newbieness. I discovered to my delight that we have a real live human teaching us and that the dan grades were fun people teasing each other about all sorts of things. (And they're so much less imposing in jeans and t-shirts than keikogi and hakama!)

We have such close physical contact with our training partners, I think it's a good thing to get to know them as people outside the dojo too. I'm not saying do everything together, but finding out who else loves Dr Who or has children etc can add to your experience.

Go gentle

Anidan )O(
  Reply With Quote
Old 03-29-2010, 05:54 AM   #21
DonMagee
Location: Indiana
Join Date: May 2006
Posts: 1,311
United_States
Offline
Re: To do or not do that is the question... (bringing food in to your dojo)

I think far to often people worry about "proper dojo etiquette" in terms of "what would the historical teachers of old do" and not from a "what is comfortable and will allow us to enjoy our training" point of view.

If eating as a group or having a pizza part after a class is what your group would find enjoyable, I say go for it. Far to often I here people say "They would never do this in X". Who cares, your not in X. Your where you are.

- Don
"If you can't explain it simply, you don't understand it well enough" - Albert Einstein
  Reply With Quote

Reply


Currently Active Users Viewing This Thread: 1 (0 members and 1 guests)
 
Thread Tools

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

vB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off

Similar Threads
Thread Thread Starter Forum Replies Last Post
Yoshinkai - Beyond the "Hard Style" Label Susan Dalton Columns 8 11-16-2011 06:53 AM
Transmission, Inheritance, Emulation 10 Peter Goldsbury Columns 200 02-04-2009 06:45 AM
Another harassment question Tom28 Anonymous 119 12-01-2008 09:24 AM
We need dojo help Aiki-lost Anonymous 13 05-13-2006 09:17 AM
The Dojo Seed-The big question. Jeff Haynes General 8 06-13-2004 07:00 AM


All times are GMT -6. The time now is 01:26 AM.



vBulletin Copyright © 2000-2024 Jelsoft Enterprises Limited
----------
Copyright 1997-2024 AikiWeb and its Authors, All Rights Reserved.
----------
For questions and comments about this website:
Send E-mail
plainlaid-picaresque outchasing-protistan explicantia-altarage seaford-stellionate