Welcome to AikiWeb Aikido Information
AikiWeb: The Source for Aikido Information
AikiWeb's principal purpose is to serve the Internet community as a repository and dissemination point for aikido information.

Sections
home
aikido articles
columns

Discussions
forums
aikiblogs

Databases
dojo search
seminars
image gallery
supplies
links directory

Reviews
book reviews
video reviews
dvd reviews
equip. reviews

News
submit
archive

Miscellaneous
newsletter
rss feeds
polls
about

Follow us on



Home > AikiWeb Aikido Forums
Go Back   AikiWeb Aikido Forums > Humor

Hello and thank you for visiting AikiWeb, the world's most active online Aikido community! This site is home to over 22,000 aikido practitioners from around the world and covers a wide range of aikido topics including techniques, philosophy, history, humor, beginner issues, the marketplace, and more.

If you wish to join in the discussions or use the other advanced features available, you will need to register first. Registration is absolutely free and takes only a few minutes to complete so sign up today!

Reply
 
Thread Tools
Old 08-19-2009, 09:35 PM   #1
Karo
Join Date: May 2009
Posts: 62
United_States
Offline
Limerick challenge!

There was once a great aikidoka
Whose technique was increasingly local;
His movements got smaller than ever
Till they disappeared altogether
And even his kiai was sub-vocal.

***********
Methinks I wrote about Tissier Shihan...

Now who can do better?! Come on, I know you're just raring to unleash your poetic talents upon the AikiWeb!

Karo
  Reply With Quote
Old 08-19-2009, 10:08 PM   #2
Voitokas
 
Voitokas's Avatar
Join Date: Oct 2008
Posts: 376
United_States
Offline
Re: Limerick challenge!

One night Karolina Owczarzak
after aikido got carjacked!
She tossed the offender
On top of her fender
and said "Yer not such a baddy now, are ya?"

I am not an expert
  Reply With Quote
Old 08-19-2009, 11:00 PM   #3
Karo
Join Date: May 2009
Posts: 62
United_States
Offline
Re: Limerick challenge!

Quote:
Jeremy Morrison wrote: View Post
One night Karolina Owczarzak
Jeremy gets plus 100 points for spelling my last name correctly

For the rest of you, don't worry, in this game everything's made up and the points don't matter... That's right, the points are just like "Whose Line" and your aikido rank...

So, I'll see your hijack and raise you marine fauna with a local flair:

There was a shodan from Woodley Park*
Who was attacked by a giant shark;
He grabbed the large fin,
Did a sankyo pin
And made it promise to eat only bark.

************
* Woodley Park is where my dojo is in DC. Now I wonder who's the shodan...

Karo
  Reply With Quote
Old 08-20-2009, 12:20 AM   #4
Linda Eskin
 
Linda Eskin's Avatar
Dojo: Aikido of San Diego, San Diego, California
Location: San Diego County, California
Join Date: May 2009
Posts: 335
United_States
Offline
Tongue Re: Limerick challenge!

Dagnabbit. Why'd you have to bring up Limericks just before bedtime? Now my mind won't shut up. Here are a couple written while brushing my teeth:

There once was a sensei named Dave
Who would practice all day with a glaive.
He mastered the kata
of the naginata
'Til the motion was just like a wave.

There was a yudansha named Karen
Whose waza was flashy and darin'.
Her hakama flew
as her uke she slew.
And all of the white belts were starin'.

Last edited by Linda Eskin : 08-20-2009 at 12:28 AM.

Linda Eskin - Facebook | My Aikido blog: Grab My Wrist

"Heaven is right where you are standing, and that is the place to train." - Morihei Ueshiba
  Reply With Quote
Old 08-20-2009, 12:27 AM   #5
Linda Eskin
 
Linda Eskin's Avatar
Dojo: Aikido of San Diego, San Diego, California
Location: San Diego County, California
Join Date: May 2009
Posts: 335
United_States
Offline
Tongue Re: Limerick challenge!

Aha! Another one:

No one does ukemi like Jay,
Who rolls in his own special way.
He melds with the mat,
With nary a splat,
And pops up on the preceding day.

I still got nothin' close to that first one (by the OP), though.

Linda Eskin - Facebook | My Aikido blog: Grab My Wrist

"Heaven is right where you are standing, and that is the place to train." - Morihei Ueshiba
  Reply With Quote
Old 08-20-2009, 07:31 AM   #6
Linda Eskin
 
Linda Eskin's Avatar
Dojo: Aikido of San Diego, San Diego, California
Location: San Diego County, California
Join Date: May 2009
Posts: 335
United_States
Offline
Re: Limerick challenge!

In his three DVDs about Entries,
Ledyard shares what's been passed on for centuries:
If you're already in
The attacker can't win
Just drop, and he'll be on his knees.


Linda Eskin - Facebook | My Aikido blog: Grab My Wrist

"Heaven is right where you are standing, and that is the place to train." - Morihei Ueshiba
  Reply With Quote
Old 08-20-2009, 12:27 PM   #7
Nick P.
 
Nick P.'s Avatar
Dojo: Sukagawa Aikido Club of Montreal
Location: Montreal
Join Date: Aug 2000
Posts: 641
Offline
Re: Limerick challenge!

The other evening on my way to class
I grew curious and I had to ask
What will sensei do tonight
Lots of attacks but no fight
And for sure we'll end up on our collective ass

  Reply With Quote
Old 08-20-2009, 01:14 PM   #8
Shadowfax
 
Shadowfax's Avatar
Dojo: Allegheny Aikido, Pitsburgh PA
Location: Pittsburgh PA
Join Date: May 2009
Posts: 948
United_States
Offline
Re: Limerick challenge!

I know a cool Sensei named Garth
Whose Waza is hardly a farce,
He'll show you the way,,
To Irimi Nage',
And introduce you to the planet Earth.

I also know someone named Pyle,
Who has an encouraging smile,
But his technique's no joke
When he does a nikyo,
You'll find yourself flyin a mile.
  Reply With Quote
Old 08-20-2009, 02:04 PM   #9
Karo
Join Date: May 2009
Posts: 62
United_States
Offline
Re: Limerick challenge!

Oh, well, if we're boasting about our senseis now....

There was a sensei called Michael
Who was famous from here to Lake Baikal
He trained at great pace
With such skill and grace
That the uke could not be recycled.

****************
I should soooooo get a promotion for that...

Karo
  Reply With Quote
Old 08-20-2009, 02:51 PM   #10
Shadowfax
 
Shadowfax's Avatar
Dojo: Allegheny Aikido, Pitsburgh PA
Location: Pittsburgh PA
Join Date: May 2009
Posts: 948
United_States
Offline
Re: Limerick challenge!

Quote:
Oh, well, if we're boasting about our senseis now....
ah I'd rather not call it boasting. Just a certain amount of admiration.

But then maybe you haven't met Tara
who has quite a knowledge of hara.
with a shomenuchi cut
she'll put you on your but
and she won't even smear her mascara.

Oh I am in so much trouble arn't I?

There's also this girl you should meet
she walked in one day off the street.
shes an interesting case,
she don't land on her face
In spite of her tangled up feet.
  Reply With Quote
Old 08-20-2009, 08:37 PM   #11
Voitokas
 
Voitokas's Avatar
Join Date: Oct 2008
Posts: 376
United_States
Offline
Re: Limerick challenge!

Quote:
Karolina Owczarzak wrote: View Post
Oh, well, if we're boasting about our senseis now....

There was a sensei called Michael
Who was famous from here to Lake Baikal
He trained at great pace
With such skill and grace
That the uke could not be recycled.

****************
I should soooooo get a promotion for that...

Karo
Nice.

I am not an expert
  Reply With Quote
Old 08-20-2009, 10:20 PM   #12
ninjaqutie
 
ninjaqutie's Avatar
Dojo: Searching for a new home
Location: Delaware (<3 still in Oregon!)
Join Date: Apr 2009
Posts: 1,004
United_States
Offline
Re: Limerick challenge!

There once was a man in Nagoya,
Who said "I have something to show ya."
He spins you around,
You fly up and down,
As he says "It was nice to know ya."

~Look into the eyes of your opponent & steal his spirit.
~To be a good martial artist is to be good thief; if you want my knowledge, you must take it from me.
  Reply With Quote
Old 08-20-2009, 11:32 PM   #13
Linda Eskin
 
Linda Eskin's Avatar
Dojo: Aikido of San Diego, San Diego, California
Location: San Diego County, California
Join Date: May 2009
Posts: 335
United_States
Offline
Re: Limerick challenge!

Aikido is all about blending,
Aligning, flow, and defending.
We came to this way
Through our dear O Sensei.
And now it's the world we are mending.


Linda Eskin - Facebook | My Aikido blog: Grab My Wrist

"Heaven is right where you are standing, and that is the place to train." - Morihei Ueshiba
  Reply With Quote
Old 08-21-2009, 10:40 AM   #14
Patrick Hutchinson
Join Date: Jan 2008
Posts: 95
Offline
Re: Limerick challenge!

Behold the Three Tenors of Aiki:
There's Dan, and there's Ark, and there's Mikey,
They can put back the Ki
In the waza, you see,
And make every uke yell "Crikey!"

(with apologies to Mr. Sigman for unearned familiarity)
  Reply With Quote
Old 08-21-2009, 07:47 PM   #15
Karo
Join Date: May 2009
Posts: 62
United_States
Offline
Re: Limerick challenge!

I didn't mean to imply in my previous post that our dojo condones violent training in any way... So here's another perspective on our Sensei:

There was a sensei in Northwest D.C.
With an exceptional command of ki;
When he was away
His spirit would stay
And scold students invisibly.

Hmmmm, somehow I don't think this fully reflects the atmosphere of loving kindness which really pervades our dojo...

Also, some of our senior black belts have just become more senior than previously:

A wise aikidoka named Larry
To Okinawa went, testing his merit;
He returned from Japan
With a second dan,
For his aiki was exemplary.

Larry doesn't read these forums, AFAIK, but I just wanted to share, because he's the coolest sempai ever. Also, he leads a killer warm-up!

Karo
  Reply With Quote
Old 12-10-2009, 08:50 PM   #16
OwlMatt
 
OwlMatt's Avatar
Dojo: Milwaukee Aikikai
Location: Wisconsin
Join Date: Dec 2009
Posts: 401
United_States
Offline
Re: Limerick challenge!

There is an old aikido sensei
Who likes teaching the Hombu defense way.
His uke say he's gruff,
Evil-tempered, and tough.
Maybe so, but that's not what his friends say.
  Reply With Quote
Old 12-10-2009, 10:29 PM   #17
Josh Lerner
 
Josh Lerner's Avatar
Location: Renton, WA
Join Date: Oct 2005
Posts: 80
United_States
Offline
Re: Limerick challenge!

Quote:
Patrick Hutchinson wrote: View Post
Behold the Three Tenors of Aiki:
There's Dan, and there's Ark, and there's Mikey,
They can put back the Ki
In the waza, you see,
And make every uke yell "Crikey!"

(with apologies to Mr. Sigman for unearned familiarity)
A pursuer of internal training,
was concerned that his power was waning.
He'd grimace and glower
to increase his power
but everyone knew he was feigning.
  Reply With Quote
Old 12-10-2009, 11:49 PM   #18
Josh Lerner
 
Josh Lerner's Avatar
Location: Renton, WA
Join Date: Oct 2005
Posts: 80
United_States
Offline
Re: Limerick challenge!

A sensei I knew in Peru,
Wrote fine limericks that stopped at line two.
  Reply With Quote
Old 12-11-2009, 12:52 AM   #19
Linda Eskin
 
Linda Eskin's Avatar
Dojo: Aikido of San Diego, San Diego, California
Location: San Diego County, California
Join Date: May 2009
Posts: 335
United_States
Offline
Re: Limerick challenge!

Awesome, Josh!

Here's one about tonight's class:
Though I love Thursday night's weapons class,
my techniques with the jo barely pass
for aikido. It's true,
and it makes me quite blue,
that I tripped up and fell on my side.
Haha... I crack myself up.

Linda Eskin - Facebook | My Aikido blog: Grab My Wrist

"Heaven is right where you are standing, and that is the place to train." - Morihei Ueshiba
  Reply With Quote
Old 12-11-2009, 05:20 AM   #20
chris wright
 
chris wright's Avatar
Dojo: White Rose Aikikai
Location: South Yorkshire
Join Date: Oct 2003
Posts: 30
Offline
Re: Limerick challenge!

There was a sensei called Shane
Who knew a lot about pain
Thrown to the mat
Hit it with a 'SPLAT'
Bow, and continue to train
  Reply With Quote
Old 01-24-2010, 02:37 AM   #21
Eugene Leslie
 
Eugene Leslie's Avatar
Location: Red Deer
Join Date: Jan 2010
Posts: 59
Canada
Offline
Re: Limerick challenge!

In the spirit of the 2010 Winter Olympics; and being a Canadian born in the province of British Columbia in which they will be held; I hereby appoint myself judge and judicator of aforesaid Limerick Challenge!
Heretofore, therefore, furthermore...and any other lawyer-like terms I may have missed.

The Bronze medal goes to......(drumroll)....

The United States! ....and Karolina Owczarzak!!!

Quote:
Karolina Owczarzak wrote: View Post
There was a sensei in Northwest D.C.
With an exceptional command of ki;
When he was away
His spirit would stay
And scold students invisibly.
Exceptional rhyming tempo while keeping the spirit of aikido in the forefront... (spaztic clapping with Cheshire Cat grin....!!).

And the Silver medal is awarded to.......(Anne of Green Gables two fisted apprehensive chin tuck).......

The United States!! for Cherie Cornmesser's stirring piece!

Quote:
Cherie Cornmesser wrote: View Post
But then maybe you haven't met Tara
who has quite a knowledge of hara.
with a shomenuchi cut
she'll put you on your but
and she won't even smear her mascara.
"A great piece, Dr. Seuss! Superb rhyming and female Aikidoka imagery!
"Yes I agree, Shakespeare. She may have had a chance for gold but unfortunately was deducted two points for beginning with a conjunction and misspelling "butt". A marvellous showing nonetheless!
Congratulations!!

The Gold medal in this years Limerick Olympic Challenge belongs to..........(expectant, breath holding hush..........)

The U.S of A! and Linda Eskin!!!

(the band begins playing) America....America......

Quote:
Linda Eskin wrote: View Post
There was a yudansha named Karen
Whose waza was flashy and darin'.
Her hakama flew
as her uke she slew.
And all of the white belts were starin'.
(A teary acceptance......a wave to the crowd...)................

"The U.S.A. has swept the Limerick Challenge! The U.S.A. has swept the Limerick Challenge!"

"Oh my! What a championship!"

"Linda Eskin's masterpiece captures the essence of the feel of a Dojo, whilst using traditional terminology. Her use of moderate slang, perfect rhyme and personal narrarative is deserving of the highest award of Limerickismiasticks!"

"So closes another challenge...will the U.S.A. continue to dominate the lyrical arena? Where are the other representatives of their respective countries? I dunno Bob; but The Swedes and Czechs have glib tongues and the Japanese continue to dominate the Haiku arena."
"Until next time ..keep your bokken close and your keyboard closer."

Self-discipline is the chief element of self-esteem; and self-esteem the chief element of courage. Thucydides
  Reply With Quote
Old 01-24-2010, 06:25 AM   #22
aikishihan
Dojo: aikido academy/alhambra,california
Location: Los Angeles, California
Join Date: Sep 2004
Posts: 371
United_States
Offline
Re: Limerick challenge!

Kudos to all who joined in
To laugh, have fun, not to win
a contest of Aiki
with humor so likey
that now I'm just left with a grin
  Reply With Quote
Old 01-24-2010, 06:33 AM   #23
Shadowfax
 
Shadowfax's Avatar
Dojo: Allegheny Aikido, Pitsburgh PA
Location: Pittsburgh PA
Join Date: May 2009
Posts: 948
United_States
Offline
Re: Limerick challenge!

Wow.... I am honored, thank you. Congrats to Karolina on her bronze and to my aiki sister, Linda on her victory.
  Reply With Quote
Old 01-24-2010, 11:04 AM   #24
Linda Eskin
 
Linda Eskin's Avatar
Dojo: Aikido of San Diego, San Diego, California
Location: San Diego County, California
Join Date: May 2009
Posts: 335
United_States
Offline
Talking Re: Limerick challenge!

Thank you, thank you... I'm honored.

I'd like to give an Honorable Mention to Josh Lerner for his very creative and economical Limerick:

Quote:
Josh Lerner wrote: View Post
A sensei I knew in Peru,
Wrote fine limericks that stopped at line two.
That was fun.

Linda Eskin - Facebook | My Aikido blog: Grab My Wrist

"Heaven is right where you are standing, and that is the place to train." - Morihei Ueshiba
  Reply With Quote
Old 01-24-2010, 11:57 AM   #25
Eric Webber
Dojo: Aikido West Reading
Location: Reading, Pa
Join Date: Dec 2004
Posts: 261
United_States
Offline
Re: Limerick challenge!

Hand me my dogi, give me my belt;
Onto the mat, train and get svelt.

Irimi here and tankan there,
When pinning ukes, avoid kneeling on their hair.

Swing your bokken, jab with your jo;
Blending with your partner, go with the flow.
  Reply With Quote

Reply


Currently Active Users Viewing This Thread: 1 (0 members and 1 guests)
 
Thread Tools

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

vB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off

Similar Threads
Thread Thread Starter Forum Replies Last Post
kendo's gruelling challenge Shany Non-Aikido Martial Traditions 12 12-14-2010 01:28 PM
042) The Challenge: Week of June 29, 2009 Marc Abrams External Aikido Blog Posts 0 06-28-2009 12:50 PM
The Challenge SeiserL Columns 4 01-19-2009 06:38 AM
a challenge Cyrijl General 38 05-20-2003 04:31 PM
Meeting the challenge. Jonathan General 29 04-21-2002 12:21 AM


All times are GMT -6. The time now is 05:12 AM.



vBulletin Copyright © 2000-2024 Jelsoft Enterprises Limited
----------
Copyright 1997-2024 AikiWeb and its Authors, All Rights Reserved.
----------
For questions and comments about this website:
Send E-mail
plainlaid-picaresque outchasing-protistan explicantia-altarage seaford-stellionate