Welcome to AikiWeb Aikido Information
AikiWeb: The Source for Aikido Information
AikiWeb's principal purpose is to serve the Internet community as a repository and dissemination point for aikido information.

Sections
home
aikido articles
columns

Discussions
forums
aikiblogs

Databases
dojo search
seminars
image gallery
supplies
links directory

Reviews
book reviews
video reviews
dvd reviews
equip. reviews

News
submit
archive

Miscellaneous
newsletter
rss feeds
polls
about

Follow us on



Home > AikiWeb Aikido Forums
Go Back   AikiWeb Aikido Forums > General

Hello and thank you for visiting AikiWeb, the world's most active online Aikido community! This site is home to over 22,000 aikido practitioners from around the world and covers a wide range of aikido topics including techniques, philosophy, history, humor, beginner issues, the marketplace, and more.

If you wish to join in the discussions or use the other advanced features available, you will need to register first. Registration is absolutely free and takes only a few minutes to complete so sign up today!

Reply
 
Thread Tools
Old 07-18-2005, 07:11 PM   #1
malsmith
Dojo: Masters of Aikido in Fogelsville
Location: Bethlehem
Join Date: Nov 2004
Posts: 84
United_States
Offline
interference... yes? no?

so i was recently on vacation and while me and my sister were walking around this really small town a woman came out of a resaurant crying and with the fly of her pants pulled open... moments after seeing her, a man came out after her trying to talk to her almost trying to reason with her or something, she continued to sob and yell and swear at him, and she kept on trying to move out of his arms reach and he kept trying to grab on to her... finally she just started to run, the man kind of paused a second (expecting her to come back) and then he started to run after her, i was sort of standing in between them and the way the man was running i could have easily done some technique on him or stall him or something and let the girl keep running, but my sister pulled me out of the way and said not to interfere....

was that right? i mean aikidoka (martial artists in general) have an ability to help people like that girl but should we... or is that out of bounds?

i honestly feel really aweful that i just stepped aside and let that man go... i mean he would obviously catch up to her and she obviously seemed afraid of him and just wanted to be away from him.
  Reply With Quote
Old 07-18-2005, 07:28 PM   #2
ESimmons
Location: Birmingham, AL
Join Date: Nov 2004
Posts: 66
United_States
Offline
Re: interference... yes? no?

You were right to not get involved.
  Reply With Quote
Old 07-18-2005, 08:43 PM   #3
Aragorn
Dojo: Aikido of Marin
Location: California
Join Date: May 2005
Posts: 73
United_States
Offline
Re: interference... yes? no?

How So?
I geuss it depends on what YOU feel is right for yourself. If you think that you should help.... You should. If Not.... I would have tryed (If I wasn't shaking in my pants....Lol)
Regards,

All that is gold does not glitter. All those who wander are not lost.
  Reply With Quote
Old 07-19-2005, 09:42 AM   #4
Amir Krause
Dojo: Shirokan Dojo / Tel Aviv Israel
Join Date: Jan 2005
Posts: 692
Israel
Offline
Re: interference... yes? no?

Given your description of the event, I still can not say whether you were right or not. Think about it - if he expected her to return, he was familiar to her, and you have no idea of what was truly going on.

Amir
  Reply With Quote
Old 07-19-2005, 10:27 AM   #5
malsmith
Dojo: Masters of Aikido in Fogelsville
Location: Bethlehem
Join Date: Nov 2004
Posts: 84
United_States
Offline
Re: interference... yes? no?

yeah so i think that its like right and wrong... because i didnt know their situation it would have been wrong to have gotten involved (because obviously i did not know them), but even though i did not know them i knew there was a serious problem... so i dont know.
  Reply With Quote
Old 07-19-2005, 11:16 AM   #6
Mark Gibbons
Location: Seattle, WA
Join Date: Oct 2004
Posts: 177
United_States
Offline
Re: interference... yes? no?

Rather than sticking your body in the way when no obvious assault is occurring you might consider calling the police and reporting the situation. Feeling bad about the situation is pretty normal, I still wonder about some events 30+ years after. Its tough but admirable to care about strangers. Good luck.

Mark
  Reply With Quote
Old 07-19-2005, 11:48 AM   #7
Adam Alexander
Dojo: none currently
Join Date: Jan 2005
Posts: 499
United_States
Offline
Re: interference... yes? no?

I would of minded my own business. She apparently knew him. If she wants to carry on that type of relationship, who am I to stop her?

When I was in my late teens, there was a neighbor woman who's old man would whoop her every now and again. When they moved in and had their first fight in that house, the sister came over and begged me to help. I went over and told him to stop. I was scared (I never feel good about going into someone else's house like that). He was cool. He left.

Next day, he was back home and they were in love again. Next week, he was beating her a**. The sister comes running again...Oh, well...I didn't go back to him...she did.
  Reply With Quote
Old 07-20-2005, 04:05 AM   #8
Amir Krause
Dojo: Shirokan Dojo / Tel Aviv Israel
Join Date: Jan 2005
Posts: 692
Israel
Offline
Re: interference... yes? no?

The only interference I might have considered, would have been verbal , without resorting to physical means until the situation is clear, or you are under attack.


Amir
  Reply With Quote
Old 07-22-2005, 09:13 PM   #9
Mark Jakabcsin
Dojo: Charlotte Systema, Charlotte, NC
Location: Carolina
Join Date: Feb 2001
Posts: 207
United_States
Offline
Re: interference... yes? no?

Mal,
I wasn't present so I can't give you an honest opinion because I don't know the facts, however since you felt the need to post it seems obvious. Trust your instincts! Analyzing after the fact sucks, do what you believe is right at the moment.

Robert E. Lee said it best 'Duty is ours, consequences are Gods' or something close to that.

MJ

ps. Take the advice of Socrates (The Peaceful Warrior) and 'Let it go'.
  Reply With Quote
Old 07-22-2005, 09:28 PM   #10
xuzen
 
xuzen's Avatar
Dojo: None at the moment - on hiatus
Join Date: May 2004
Posts: 965
Malaysia
Offline
Re: interference... yes? no?

Dear Malsmith,

You were on vacation, you were on a foreign/unfamiliar territory, you are unfamiliar with the surrounding, you do not who what is happening.... not all that you see is what it seems. You are just a passer by, you are won't be there permanently... so why bother?

If you you really want to be a good Samaritan, you will be of greater help to remember clinically what happened, e.g., time of incidence, clothing of the man and/or woman, distinct facial feature of the man, height, etc etc...and convey these to the police should something really bad happen.

Just my logic speaking.

Boon.

SHOMEN-ATE (TM), the solution to 90% of aikido and life's problems.
  Reply With Quote
Old 07-24-2005, 04:26 PM   #11
Amassus
 
Amassus's Avatar
Dojo: Aikido Musubi Ryu/ Yoshin Wadokan
Location: Hamilton
Join Date: Aug 2003
Posts: 306
New Zealand
Offline
Re: interference... yes? no?

I don't know much on this sort of thing, but I have read that many police officers say that domestic violence is a toughy. Quite often if you interfere, both parties forget about their fight and attack you.
I think it was wise to stay out of the dilemma.

"flows like water, reflects like a mirror, and responds like an echo." Chaung-tse
  Reply With Quote
Old 07-25-2005, 04:53 AM   #12
ian
 
ian's Avatar
Dojo: University of Ulster, Coleriane
Location: Northern Ireland
Join Date: Oct 2000
Posts: 1,654
Offline
Re: interference... yes? no?

We can't make decisions for you - and neither can your sister! You must judge a situation based on your own knowledge and experience and desire to feel morally righteous. You did what you had to do at the time. I can't really tell, but I presume they knew each other, so maybe that will alleviate your conscience a little.

Whether you do aikido or not is not the question - whatever you do, you can still get killed by getting involved in a situation. There was a buddhist who taught in the west who said that action should be out of compassion and not out of ego fulfillment. Thus, you could have investigated, but be willing to be heavily insulted by both of them for interfering (or even have to run away to avoid becoming the target of both of their anger).

Usually we worry about situations like this because we don't have enough information. I've waded into situations which I have completely misinterpreted. IMHO The best thing is to talk to them and ask if everything is OK (i.e. get more information), but be prepared to be apologetic if you then realise your interference is inappropriate. However I'm not your moral judge, and you had no legal responsibility to do anything. I like to think a highly ethical person does things because they are the right thing to do at the time, not because it is of personal benefit or because of fear of personal loss.

PS. don't feel awful - the fact that you are thinking about it suggests that you want to resolve a response which you don't think was necessarily appropriate, and this is likely to help you in the future.

---understanding aikido is understanding the training method---
  Reply With Quote
Old 07-25-2005, 04:56 AM   #13
ian
 
ian's Avatar
Dojo: University of Ulster, Coleriane
Location: Northern Ireland
Join Date: Oct 2000
Posts: 1,654
Offline
Re: interference... yes? no?

PPS I remember on another thread someone saying about a person who intervened to protect someone and they themselves were injured and paralysed. At the time it was suggested that it was wrong to interfere. However I think it is OK as long as there is a realisation of the potential consequences. To me martial arts training has to come down to being able to look death in the face and still make the appropriate decision.

---understanding aikido is understanding the training method---
  Reply With Quote

Reply


Currently Active Users Viewing This Thread: 1 (0 members and 1 guests)
 
Thread Tools

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

vB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off


All times are GMT -6. The time now is 04:08 PM.



vBulletin Copyright © 2000-2024 Jelsoft Enterprises Limited
----------
Copyright 1997-2024 AikiWeb and its Authors, All Rights Reserved.
----------
For questions and comments about this website:
Send E-mail
plainlaid-picaresque outchasing-protistan explicantia-altarage seaford-stellionate