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Old 02-18-2015, 08:10 AM   #26
lbb
Location: Massachusetts
Join Date: Jun 2006
Posts: 3,059
United_States
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Re: Dojo Jerk

The way I see it, this is simple (not necessarily easy, but simple).

1. Talk to the chief instructor, immediately.
2. If you can't or won't do that, leave.
3. If talking to the chief instructor does not result in a change that suits you, leave.

Mind you, anything the chief instructor does is not going to have an instantaneous effect. So if you already know that you don't have the patience to resolve this, then stop complaining and leave.

I will address a couple of points that you brought up: the age thing and the "fun" thing. Seniority in a martial art is not a matter of age, and if you expect a degree of deference merely because you are older than someone, or you are unwilling to take correction from a younger person, then martial arts may not be the right environment for you. As for the fun thing, you say that "He even went as far to tell us in the class we need to shut up and keep practicing as if we were on a job, Christ some of us see class as enjoyable and fun this guy is taking all the fun and activity out of it." Not having been there, I don't know exactly how this went down, but while some talking on the mat is accepted at many dojos, it really should be minimized. There are many activities where casual conversation is perfectly fine, but the mat is really not the place for discussions or for chitchat. Being told to talk less and train more is something that happens to everyone from time to time, and there are plenty of excellent teachers who are not in the least bit abusive, but who insist on a strict environment in their classes. That, by itself, is neither bullying nor abuse -- but it may just rub you the wrong way, and you have to be honest with yourself about that. Some people are just not suited to that environment, in which case, again, it's long past time for you to leave.
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Old 03-05-2015, 11:58 AM   #27
"Meat Biscuit"
IP Hash: 070c1fdf
Anonymous User
Re: Dojo Jerk

Bottom line some people should not be in Martial Arts at all it takes a big jerk and turns him into a HUGE JERK.. I've seen this numerous times. If your chief instructor will not help LEAVE. Sounds like that guy is a walking FELONY.. His time will come someone will always challenge a guy like that its not you trust me its HIM.. TRUTH hurts and most people don't wanna here the RAW truth that GUY has NO PLACE in MARTIAL Arts hes' an abuser with a GI and a BLACKBELT.
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Old 11-10-2015, 07:42 PM   #28
jdm4life
Join Date: Mar 2014
Posts: 52
United_States
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Re: Dojo Jerk

http://www.universityobserver.ie/wp-...kid_1984_2.jpg
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Old 11-12-2015, 08:21 AM   #29
silversmoke
Location: andover
Join Date: Jan 2015
Posts: 9
United Kingdom
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Re: Dojo Jerk

If its as you say the guys a bully, unusual I've found to find one in a dojo, a good sensei would spot it immediately, train rough back a good smack in the mouth should do it.
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Old 11-12-2015, 09:53 AM   #30
rugwithlegs
Dojo: Open Sky Aikikai
Location: Durham, NC
Join Date: Apr 2013
Posts: 327
United_States
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Re: Dojo Jerk

Not sure what to make of the OP, who nearly got thrown out because of a run in with this training partner. Aikido has a number of different ways to practice. I have had a training partner who ran off the mat from everyone, even the Sensei, if she was scared of the practice. And, she was scared of a lot. She had been abused by her family.

Feeling pain can be common in practice, injuries should not be - but no injuries were mentioned.

Talking during class - I've yet to meet the teacher who did not consider this rude behavior and wanted people to get back to training.

It's not a democracy - hopefully the person who trained longer knows more. I don't think I would like training with the object of the post, but not sure I would care to train with either.

Interpersonal problems can happen. They are never solved by anonymously whining to strangers online. I believe Katherine alluded to this.
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Old 11-12-2015, 05:53 PM   #31
Sojourner
Location: Adelaide
Join Date: Dec 2013
Posts: 202
Australia
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Re: Dojo Jerk

I would probably have to agree with Tony Stoodley! I know of a chap who was suspended from a Karate dojo here after becoming sick of some moron using illegal techniques to which the club leadership simply turned a blind eye to, including when injuries were occuring, so after recieving one such incident he simply responded with Tony's suggestion and moved on somewhere else.

Sadly there are bullies in Aikido or any other Martial Art you care to mention. Sometimes in the case of Aikido it can be good to have some training and background in Judo to handle such a person, yet again as stated by others above, lets at least try and have some discussion with the leadership first, if they choose to do nothing then clearly they give their endoresment to the behavior, so you might as well bring your Judo training onto the mat also to help them out.
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Old 11-13-2015, 05:57 PM   #32
Currawong
Dojo: Shoheijuku Aikido, Fukuoka
Location: Fukuoka
Join Date: Sep 2002
Posts: 60
Japan
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Re: Dojo Jerk

Quote:
Anonymous User wrote: View Post
I am OP and the person I speak of is a male in his 30's and is quite a bully he seems to pick someone and just down right attack them physically when their not expecting it or verbally abusing them
I don't think verbal abuse is appropriate in the dojo. If there are clear expectations about what is appropriate and what is not and one understands the attitude required at the dojo, then the most that should be required for any discipline is a calm discussion with a student as required.

Surprise attacks (or more accurately, attacks with unusual timing) and exploiting weaknesses are an important part of training if for the purposes of helping a student improve and if practiced appropriately. They are not appropriate if used in bullying.

A good question that may be worth asking in this case is: Are other students in the dojo having trouble with this guy?
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Old 11-15-2015, 02:28 PM   #33
nikyu62
Dojo: Aikido Club of American Samoa
Location: American Samoa
Join Date: Jan 2015
Posts: 94
American Samoa
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Re: Dojo Jerk

The OP is gone apparently, but he never said if the "jerk" was the teacher. If he was not, the teacher should never allow this in the dojo. If he was the teacher, the OP should find another dojo. Guess he did.
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Old 12-03-2015, 06:52 PM   #34
john2054
 
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Location: Derby
Join Date: Apr 2013
Posts: 82
United Kingdom
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Re: Dojo Jerk

I think i was the bad guy in this story. I'm sorry if i offended anyone, the op or anyone else in the way i behaved. Call it disfunction?!
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