Re: Learning to Relax
The fastest and surest way to know the feeling if you are relaxed is ironically - to practice to the point of exhaustion!
I normally get it doing a lot of ukemis, alone or during a lot of repetitive techniques, the best for me doing ukemi for iriminage. What happens is your arm gets limp, you pant a lot, your knees weaken, your shoulders drop, your mind gets numb.
Basically the body gets so tired from ukemi that your muscles won't function anymore. There you are "forced" to think of another way to make the techniques work on your partner because your body wont function normally.
Because you are so tired, it is easier for you to command your mind and body to "let go". If the techniques work with your muscles not functioning anymore, that will be the feeling of being relaxed IMHO because you know that it is purely technique.
just be careful that you dont get too tired.