Thread: In a quandary
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Old 05-19-2011, 04:34 AM   #46
graham christian
Dojo: golden center aikido-highgate
Location: london
Join Date: Oct 2010
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Re: In a quandary

Quote:
Carsten Möllering wrote: View Post
Wow!!!

This sounds as if to some of you aikido is the only "tool" to live, to understand, to enjoy or appreciate (in a real deep sense) your daily life???

I'm doing aikido everyday for a real lot of years now. And it is one of the most important things and priority in my life.

But. I can't imagine to meisure everything I do through aikido. Or to use aikido as a "tool" for everything I encounter in live.

True. Awarness is learned during practice. But it is also learned in other situations in our life. Or should be. Or could be. Same with being centered, distance, ... all those other things mentioned.

Yes. We learn them at the dojo. But also in other contexts of our life. And there are lots of methods and tools which can also be used to learn.
I mentioned NVC as one example. This gives specific advise when dealing with a verbal conflict. It works, it helps, it brings situations forward.

Why transporting "aikido" into a context it isn't (in my eyes ) made for? Why not use what is just there?

Well, but in class we practice and learn to deal with a physical attack? We learn to control an opponent using aiki, which is a physicall and psychological connection to the attacker?
We definitely don't learn to control someone using words, body language or something like that? We don't deal with situations before a conflict becomes physical?
We learn and practice a very distinguished form of physical control of another individual. Ereytime we practice?

Mary, please excuse me for taking one of your sentences as an example but it struck me:

Isn't this something we teach our children in the kindergarten (elementary school?), i.e. beginning when they are three years old.
And maybe this is learned in a different way when doing a job, where talking is part of the business. Especially when using words to deal with conflicts, mental illnesses, pastoral counseling etc.
We definetly don't use aikido in both case but "natural" behavior / courtesy. Or a proffesional method just as complex as aikido.

I see two difficulties when looking at aikido in such a wide sense:

Aikido may be thought usefull in contexts where there exist other tools, which do better fit to the given situation.

And aikido may loose it's specific qualitiy of dealing with physical conflicts dangers when applied in contexts it isn't made for.
Hi Carsten.
I see you are quite surprised by the view of using Aikido in all of life. Well the principles extant in Aikido are principles of life in my opinion and so apply to anything.

A physical conflict or danger is merely a part of life and and actually a result of mental/spiritual conflict.

When it comes to mental illness, pastoral counselling etc. I must say that the principles are excellent for those activities and I may say even essential for good results. Thinking too physically is what blinds us from a lot of what's happening. For instance........

Counselling: Communication is not just words, that is a minor part of communication. Communication is first and foremost a two way flow and thus forms a circle. You com. to me, I acknowledge and then com. back to you. A circle. It contains giving to and receiving from. Just like Aikido. As with Aikido if you lose that connection then you lose that circle and get stuck or go into contention or struggle. In fact if you observe communication in action in life from the view of it being a circle then you will notice the main causes of upsets. It's when the circle is broken, when that principle is discarded. eg:Someone interrupts you when speaking, someone fails to acknowledge you as if your not there, someone answers you before youv'e finished, someone won't let you get a response in. All examples of preventing the circle of communication and this is the basis of upset and annoyance.

In Aikido we practice be willing to receive to center and then give back from center. A circle, a two way flow, communication. The most important part of this is the willingness to receive without resistance at which point the assailants energy has no more adverse effect. The same goes for communication and shows us that LISTENING is the most important part of communication rather than the words spoken and clever ways to use words. All good counsellors know this and also know the importance of keeping center, being there comfortably with the person, letting them complete their communication without interference, ( just like letting a punch complete it's misssion without trying to catch it or block it) So many applications yet do we see them.

A good counsellor can then lead the person to the realization they are looking for which lies somewhere within them. Meeting, staying with, leading, all great Aikido.

Thought I would take up that point to clarify how for some it leads to seeing the same principles they are learning are indeed present in all situations in life itself.

Food for thought?

Regards.G.
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