Allen Beebe

Here are 10 reasons for my hating Aikido (Not necessarily in order and not necessarily my top 10):

1) Every time I tie on my hakama I immediately have to pee.

2) The harder and longer I practice the more I realize my limitations and faults.

3) Even though my body is breaking down I'm happier training than when I am not training.

4) My Aikido students walk into my house (even if I lock the door) and drink my beer without asking. (Although usually they ask if I want one too.)

5) My Aikido students learn what I teach them to the extent that they delight in hurting me and force me to realize my limitations and faults and won't stop rubbing my nose in it until I improve enough that they can no-longer do so . . . AND THEN they expect me to teach them how to do it again!

6) I never was as good as "I used to be" and probably will never be as good as I want to be, and I don't feel as good about what I have accomplished as I expected to feel about it in the first place.

7) Where's the love? Where's the peace? (Not where's the fridge!)

8) My 1 1/2 year old son does my solo body exercises better than I do.

9) Anytime somebody wants to pick a fight with me and I warn them that I've trained in the deadly martial art of Aikido for decades, they walk away laughing . . . and I never get to try out any of my cool moves! (Which I'm absolutely convinced will work as practiced as long as they a) attack with proper intent and form, and b) properly realize that one strike can kill in Aikido and behave accordingly.)

10) I met my wife, became a Buddhist priest, met most of my best friends, got my first job, earned higher educational degrees, get to travel around the world, and have received a host of other cherished benefits all through Aikido . . . and I HATE Aikido! (For all of the above reasons and probably others too . . .) How sucky is that?