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Aikido, for me, is a martial art with a side that requires introspection and honesty with my self.
I got involved with it because I wanted to know something about ki, having read one of Tohei Sensei's books when I was a younger man. I already knew how to beat people up, and had found long before that there was no "heart" in that kind of thing.
As I got into Aikido, I became hooked by how difficult and paradoxically simple it was. All of the techniques were basically, pretty simple, but incredibly difficult to get any kind of a handle on them because they require that I let go of so much.
I've been fortunate enough to get to take ukemi for some incredible Aikidoists, and some of the things these people were capable of were, to me, amazing. Another hook.
When I first started to train I thought all of these teachers were supermen or better people than I was, obviously, because they could have done all of these amazing things. After a few years of training, I got to see some of the character flaws these folks, like everyone else on the planet has. At first, I was disillusioned, but after a while I came to take great heart in the fact that these flawed people could "get" Aikido, it meant that no "perfection gene" was required. Another hook.
I really love the motto "masakatsu agatsu, katsuhayabi". I'll probably never get a true, self victory, but the trying makes me a little better all the time.
Basically, Aikido is what I do. I asked one of my very favorite teachers why he keeps training, his answer was "Osensei was my teacher, once I saw him, I had no choice". I feel similarly because of some of the things I've seen and felt. Now I feel a certain responsibility to the art to try to get as good as some of these people who've inspired me (may not make it, but I should try), so I can someday inspire someone else, who may actually be better than us all including Osensei, and I'll have done my part in paying back Osensei.
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