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Old 08-08-2006, 12:28 PM   #27
K Stewart
Join Date: May 2006
Posts: 9
United_States
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Re: Unsupportive spouse

Interesting that 95%+ of the responses to this thread are from men with less-than-supportive spouses. I'm a woman practicing Aikido and have an unsupportive (sometimes very, very, very unsupportive) husband. Ack! Would like any thoughts on dealing with this.

I've been practicing only six months, and God willing I will be practicing until I physically can't. Aikido has pointed out some things I need to address in life and is helping me become a better person...lifelong process.

The problem, for hubby, is that our small dojo only is able to have classes Friday and Saturday evenings. Those are my only times to train, and I have only missed a couple classes since I started. Once I commit to something, I commit. (Including to hubby.)

Hubby is at times VERY unhappy about the Fri/Sat nights away from home. However, before I started Aikido, our Fri/Sat nights consisted of watching TV, and hubby complaining about how bored he was, but not interested in going to the health club, to a movie, whatever. So, my starting Aikido has not meant there's been a huge change to our social life, because we really don't go out with other people or do things, anyway. Sigh. I most times also cook him a nice dinner that's waiting in the fridge when he gets home, so he's not eating frozen pizza.

He's very critical of the time I spend away from home, yet if he had a hobby or interest that he was greatly enjoyed, I would *happily* encourage him to pursue it! In fact, several years ago he took a class that met Mon-Thur nights until 10:00, for nearly a year. I was happy for him, and enjoyed all the projects I got done those evenings!

I've encouraged him to find something that he enjoys doing, but honestly I feel he'd rather complain than solve the problem. At this point, I don't feel terribly inclined to cut back my practice because it is so limited as it is, and it's only two nights a week. It's just too bad that it happens to be Fri/Sat.....

Sorry so long. Help?????
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