Keith Larman

One thing I find rather hilarious about this discussion is that we've discussed rather extensively what the word "harmony" means just in English. It is hard to come up with a consensus on that word alone.

For instance...

Okay, four or more definitions there. No translation issues yet. Just the word harmony. For me, classically trained in music, well, I will immediately focus in on asking what "pleasing" means. I find that requires some explication because singing in harmony and finding that pleasing assumes a musical system and context. It's like being raised on western classical music but then hearing music from some far away land that uses different notes and intervals. What is "harmonious" to my ears may not be pleasing to theirs and vice versa. So the whole "pleasing" aspect is firmly entrenches in some larger context.

My point here is that if you look further in the definitions you'll find words like "agreement" or "concord". "Man and machine in perfect harmony". That doesn't sound particularly like "pleasing" has anything to do with it. It's more about matching up, blending, fitting, or combining.

So to me, with a musical background, I don't necessarily associate pleasing as part of harmony. I find it pleasing sometimes depending on context, but it can still be in harmony and not be something I like. Harmony in a "key" sense might mean in the same key but different notes. Harmony in a rhythmic sense may mean simultaneous but not necessarily the same key, i.e., "they were playing the dissonant chord in harmony with each other."

So here you'll find people disagreeing as to whether harmony carries connotations of being "pleasing". It doesn't always. So which "harmony" are you talking about? Which harmony better "maps" to what ai means in Japanese? If the Japanese word doesn't necessarily carry the connotation of "pleasing" then a lot of the stuff that folk here in the west say about the meaning of "ai" is not-so-subtly off target. And that aspect is simply because we don't even agree on the meaning of the word harmony ourselves!

I would suggest paying attention to those who actually speak the language and also practice the art extensively. Things don't always "map" to each other well. Sometimes it's better to say "ai" kinda means something like harmony, combining, fitting (glove meet hand), etc. It may not carry all the connotations of the translated word. And understanding that requires some subtle and careful consideration.

And it most certainly means trying to avoid picking and choosing meanings that fit with what *you* want it to mean because it best fits what *you* would like it to be. Conformation bias among other things.

To go another direction, a teacher of mine outside martial arts, Japanese native, explained "Ai" in this context to me like this. We were having a lovely lunch at a local family run Japanese restaurant. She reached out and grabbed her bowl of miso soup. These weren't industrial, plastic bowls but lovely hand made bowls with lovely lids. The lids fit perfectly sealing up the bowl, keeping the soup hot. She said "This is ai -- see how they fit? See how they work together as a whole? See how this lid doesn't fit your bowl? It only fits this one. When it is on the right bowl that is ai. And there is nothing more than that -- it just 'is'."

FWIW.