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Pierre-Olivier Courcelles wrote:
Paige, just wanted you to know that i sympathize with you.
I started Aikido 5 years or so ago and i had to stop after little less than 2 years of practice (moved out of town). I started back in January and, coincidence, I met back a fellow Aikidoka that began Aikido with me 5 years ago in our old hometown...
Guess what, i still don't have my 4th kyu yet and i witnessed his 1st kyu grading last spring. I also met a few others old comrades while attending a seminar and some that were fresh new begginers when I left are now all 2nd and 1st kyu. 
What a shame and a waste of time have I told myself at first...It was a hard but valuable ego lesson. Who cares if a guy I onced helped to learn Ukemis now beats the sh*t out of me? I know for sure that I'm doing Aikido because I love it and for my own training only, not in a race against some sempais.
IMHO, your issue about your grading speed and my little bring-the-ego-down-to-earth story and both a great exemple of one of O-Sensei's goal in Aikido: masakatsu agatsu -> Victory over yourself.
Try to use this experience in a constructive way, like someone said: there is merit without skill and skill without merit. I'd like to add my version: skill with merit -> the one you award yourself.
Last note: makes me think of a prof. i had in university that once told us in the class right before a final: "If it doesn't hurts, it's worth nothing doing it. See ya at the bar." 
I liked that one...
Keep on your practice,
P-O |
Thanks for your concern.
I started this thread a long time ago, and my views on belt rankings have changed somewhat since then. I still feel like there should be only one belt system for adults and kids no matter what... it would just be easier for everyone. But i guess its not my dojo.
I am still 4th kyu. It seems a bit degrading even now that i havent had a test or advanced in almost 3 years. I know im growing in aikido and i learn everytime i go to class. But it seems like im the only one who recognizes my progress...and that alone can be disappointing whether i have "skill without merit" or not. But i understand what everyone has told me. I have grown mentally because i started another MA in the past year and im really gaining confidence because im told all the time that im best in the class (not bragging but compliments feel good). And thats just in one year.
The whole "belt ranking" thing doesnt get to me as much as it used to. I guess thats something u gain with age and experience. Right now aikido is just kind of acting as a '' side-kick" to my other MA (shaolin , in case your wondering) I know thats kind of a wrong way to look at aikido but i cant help it... shaolin is moving so fast and im really more into it right now, i have a tourney in 17 days and honestly i havent been to aikido in about 3 weeks but i still remember everything like i was there yesterday. Oh well... i guess in the end it will all work out okay. I'll move at the pace that i want to and everyone else will have to deal with that whether they think im progressing or not... Showing up at aikido at an average of about twice a month is okay with me right now.
-Paige