Re: The best way to win is not to play
As others have noted, domestic violence situations are very risky for all those involved, including Good Samaritans and police officers. You were very wise to handle it like you did.
To offer a POV from a different martial tradition: Most of my training has been in the Filipino martial arts, many of which are quite different philosophically than Aikido. They tend to be, essentially, killing and maiming arts. Perhaps paradoxically, I will choose "not to play" precisely because of this. I know where things could go and how they could end, and I have no desire to kill or main another living thing (or be killed or maimed myself!) if it is at all possible to avoid doing so.
And David… I've done the exact same thing with my cell phone when faced with an irate meth addict.