Thread: Equitable?
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Old 03-12-2005, 01:38 PM   #209
Mike Sigman
Location: Durango, CO
Join Date: Feb 2005
Posts: 4,123
Re: Equitable?

Lynn Seiser wrote:
(I usually don't do this, but ...)

IMHO, sarcasm is for the ignorant and arrogant,
Strange coincidence... that' s exactly what I think about psychology, Lynn. It's the non-science thats membership has become a laughingstock for its ultra-liberal orientation. "Ultra-liberal" meaning similar to "Ultra-Right in that it is "not centered" in my opinion.
But, somewhere a mother, wife, sister, or girlfriend has my condolences.

If we needed proof that sexist views are alive and well in America, we have removed all trace of doubt and respect. But, thank you for illustrating the belief system that prevents things from being equitable.
Let's review quickly what Sunny said:

'When we see the way things work in a dojo we may naturally assume the respect required of us is the repressive kind that we have worked so hard to buck. There are likely many more women who could be excellent students, but quit over this misunderstanding. Only few of us are willing or able to overcome this obstacle.

I think in general, different things make us feel respected than what makes men feel respected. Since dojo life was set up by and for men, it makes sense that it encourages them in their "native language". Perhaps the men feel we are "fragile" and "weak" when women complain only about feeling left out, because they understand that to mean we are complaining about feeling disrespected from hard training. We in turn get insulted at the idea that we can't handle hard training... And so it goes...'

So why you didn't offer any condolences about that obliquely negative attack on men, Lynn (and it wasn't even "tonge-in-cheek" the way mine was)? I'll tell you why. It's because you're in the California cultural belief-system that it's alright for a "victim" to complain and be insulting, through a series of posts, because she's just "venting" and rightfully so, in your opinion. So you took umbrage at my satire and thought it worth the oblique shot of offering condolences to a wife, mother, girlfriend, etc. Frankly, all those people would think you're a flake, Lynn, and wouldn't want your condolences. The rest of the world is not necessarily a fan of pop-psychology a la California.
(My wife would be glad I wrote this, but I will probably wished I had just stepped off the line of attack instead of into it, bowed respectfully, and left well enough alone.)
True, but I admire you for finally doing something, after all these years I've watched you post, that took a little testosterone. Congratulations.

Although what I wrote was obviously tongue-in-cheek as a response to a continued sexist rant by actually only 2 or 3 people, there's a bit of reality behind what Sunny said AND behind what I said. There are SOME dojo's where there are problems about gender, but for the most part there are more problems in the dojo's where women (and sometimes men) have a chip on their shoulder. Sunny has a chip on her shoulder, obviously, and refuses to address the fact that in most dojo's everything is at an acceptable level. She just whines and bickers about the injustice of it all. I actually know of two dojo's that were started as all-female dojo's (I'm sure there's more, but I only personally knew about 2). They didn't last. The bickering and cat-fighting ended them pretty quickly. Not to mention there was no great response and joining by women. So my comment is again, "get back to Aikido and leave the extraneous issues out of it", because there are problems everywhere that can distract. Gender problems exist on both sides. Check 'em at the door. If you're good, show it.


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