Thread: Equitable?
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Old 03-05-2005, 02:33 PM   #123
Mike Sigman
Location: Durango, CO
Join Date: Feb 2005
Posts: 4,123
Re: Equitable?

Emily Dolan Gordon wrote:
I remember the point in my training where I "settled for men". It's in my journal.
Your standards are lower than mine. I only tolerate real experts.
I, too, have survived abuse. I had to go through my black fear and rage and resentment. It took a while before I was really safe to train with, if someone scared me.. I was really a little crazy... I kept a tight leash on that monster, but my training was what taught me to ride it.
There's a part of me that rejects these comments on abuse because I realize what my berserker part does when provoked to an emotional response. Comments on personal abuse play to those emotions, Emily. It's wrong, abuse, but the more detached part of me also recognizes that without the sex drive being so strong, the species would have difficulty surviving in extreme cases. I.e., no matter what laws we pass and how much we try to make everyone sympathetic, rape and abuse is going to happen simply because we are human animals. Period. Not that I wouldn't maim or kill someone I caught abusing a woman.
I'm not suggesting that training is a replacement for psychotherapy, ... (snip)
Why don't we be totally honest and admit that for a LOT of people, Aikido and various "martial arts" are indeed psychotherapy, Emily? If we don't recognize that, we are deluding ourselves.
A lot of what we see as a "lack" of women in budo, is in fact, a result (symptom?) of social attitudes and issues. (snipsky) ..
Actually, if you go look in a singles bar for the proportion of men to women, you'll probably realize that the breeding urge, not society, is what drives the issue. If you go look in your local bookstore for the section on Women, "How to Attract Men", "Baby Journal", Cosmopolitan, "Women's Issues" and so on, you'll realize that the breeding urge still exerts its strong hand. The sex drive is second only to the survival urge, Emily... let's give it its due and not blame everything on nasty ole "society" and "Men".
My personal theory is that aikido is a "gateway drug" to the world of martial arts, and thus I don't mind if it has a genteel face. It has a good heart to back that up.
I absolutely agree.
(single combat: bubble guns at 10 paces.. )
ps: I skied today, and didn't even fall down once! Yay!!
I live in Colorado, Emily. I'm typing from 9,500 feet in my Silveton house... skiing is like breathing to me.


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