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Old 10-19-2004, 01:52 AM   #7
Aikidoiain
Join Date: Sep 2004
Posts: 140
Abu Dhabi
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Re: Group versus Individual

This is indeed an interesting thread! Those who have read my posts will already be aware of the fact that the majority of my training has been done outside a dojo. Now that I am finally attending an Aikido dojo, I feel like a square peg in a round hole to be honest!

It is true, that my reasons for training "formally" now are simply to get me out of the flat (as I am Agoraphobic) and hopefully help me to overcome my fear of being around people in general. At the moment, I'm not even thinking beyond that. Presently, going to the dojo, in itself, is a huge step forward for me. Whether I am actually relaxed enough while there, to learn Aikikai is still a concern for me.

The instructor and many of the members know of my condition - although few will actually be fully aware of how debilitating they are for me. Yes, I am the odd one out. Not just because of my Mental Health problems, but also because of my 20 or so years of "unorthodox" training. I do find it difficult to be the "clone", as was suggested, as I have already developed my own style of "self-defense" after so many years training. I am finding it difficult to conform.

Therefore, for now, I must stick to my own "selfish" agenda, which is to use "going to Aikido" as therapy.

This is my take on this issue.



Iain.
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