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Old 02-09-2001, 02:24 PM   #6
Magma
Join Date: Aug 2000
Posts: 168
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Ai symbol

Jim,
If I may respond for those others I have read and discussed this with:

You very often provoke reaction not because of what you say, but how you say it. Examples:


Which word are you having trouble understanding?
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Where did this come from? I wish I knew what you were smoking when you wrote this.
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Tim,
Yep, you are just talking. But, are you growing?
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Don't fool yourselves.
The other stuff can work, but, please, don't try to punch an attacker - you're wasting your time!


And again in this thread "I find that open minds work best." With a not so veiled tenor of "So why doesn't anyone else on this board have an open mind?"

Put simply, Jim, it's your tone: belittling of those you don't agree with, dismissive of those you don't understand, and argumentative at the slightest (misinterpreted) provocation.

What is this forum for? I'll tell you one thing this forum is specifically NOT-for: Climbing the Mountain of Jim, where after years of arduous labor and toil in gaining the summit (each day spent living the precepts that Jim illumines for us) we find the Bodhisattva Jim ready to dole out more of life's truisms for his worthy disciples.

It doesn't work that way, Jim. People are going to have opinions contrary to your own, and they are going to believe them as fervently as you do yours. So what's the difference? Why are people coming down on you if we all know that you believe your opinions just as strongly as anyone believes their own? Again, I point to your tone. If you didn't sound as if you were delivering the next set of commandments in your posts, I honestly don't think that people would have such a strong negative reaction to your opinions. Rather, I think you would have what this forum is truly for: discussion and the sharing of ideas.

It seems you enjoy provoking people for the sake of argument, while trivializing the argument itself so that they seem petty for responding. For example, in this thread:
I find that open minds work better.
Who is going to argue with that. But the implication is that only you have the most-open mind of all.
Another example, from this and previous threads:
commenting on how defensive people are.
What do you expect people to reply to being called defensive? "No, I'm not"? How asinine is that.

Now, my suggestions (just to show that I'm not just coming down on you without advice, too):
1) change your tone - you can provoke thought and discussion without setting yourself up as the master delivering the day's koan for training.
2) think about what you're writing - is it a personal attack; if so, can you put it another way?
3) remember that we're all a community here - we're all exploring, Jim. And the belittling and jabbing that may take place elsewhere on the web in chat rooms and discussion boards should be left at the door, so to speak.

...Or I could just be talking.

Tim


Tim
It's a sad irony: In U's satori, he forgot every technique he ever knew; since then, generations of doka have spent their whole careers trying to remember.
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