Thread: When to test
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Old 02-22-2003, 12:55 PM   #20
cindy perkins
Dojo: AikiDog Dojo
Location: Pittsfield, New Hampshire
Join Date: Feb 2003
Posts: 50
This one's really tough for me. Sensei wears a white belt, as does his very skilled senior student. (Ours is a very small dojo.) He explained on our first day that he was not particularly interested in ranks and belts, that he had a second dan black, but what really matters is the learning -- you are always learning. I certainly agree. I am surprised and pleased that every week I learn a little more about doing tenkan!

But I also figured out after a while that I wanted to be tested. I think it is because I make progress so very slowly. Sometimes I wonder if I am learning at all. To hear from Sensei that I might be able to test within the next few months would seem a huge accomplishment! So I asked him, and he said he is willing to do a test when I am ready. That isn't now, and that's fine. I never want a rank I don't thoroughly deserve.

At first I admired the disinterest in ranks. Then I found I wanted one, and I feel like that is an ego flaw. When I mentioned it to Sensei, he wondered if perhaps his disinterest is associated with having earned several black belts (and all the ranks preceding), so it's old hat to him. No virtue, but over-familiarity.

What do you all think?
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