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Old 12-27-2002, 03:26 AM   #14
Jeff Tibbetts
Dojo: Cedar River Aikikai
Location: Cedar Rapids, Iowa
Join Date: Oct 2002
Posts: 142
Thalib, I think you have a solid handle on what you're trying to say, wether you are too tired to say it or not, I got your messageİ I agree completely about not just discussing something, but communicating itİ Also, in the past and even today I get into heated arguments with people where I can and do discuss both sides of an issueİ I think it's important to be able to argue against your own point of view to show that you truly do understand both or all sides of a topic before choosing which one to supportİ When I grew up, our family wouldn't sit around and watch TV, we'd argue about politics or somethingİ My wife can't figure out why I love seeing my family so much around holidays, all we do is argueİ The thing is, I LOVE ITİ When it's family, you know that no matter how pissed you are at them, they'll still love you the next dayİ We don't even get mad at each other really, but you wouldn't know that listening to usİ I think it's great to just really get into it with someone so you can test your own thearies against someone elses, and see how you can take apart another argumentİ It doesn't always work, just last night I was visiting with some friends who are in town for the first time in 6 months, and all we did was argue heatedly over poilitics to no purposeİ I felt a little better afterwards, but I know he was really upset about itİ I need to try and realise that not every person I argue with is like my family, not so thick-skinned as my brothers and fatherİ My wife is, of course, an entirely different storyİ I can open up with her in different ways, and I can also not say certain things as easily with her as with the rest of my familyİ It's not a trust thing, it's a contextual thingİ Sometimes I know it's OK to one thing around certain people and not others, it's just kind of crappy when I paint myself into a corner like how I have with this spirituality conceptİ I got to the point that I may have lost some credibility in that department, and I don't know how to get it backİ

Thanks for listeningİ Sometimes I wonder if I just post this for myselfİ Does this stuff interest anyone else?

If the Nightingale doesn't sing-
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