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Old 12-11-2002, 01:39 PM   #4
Dojo: Shoshin Aikido Dojos
Location: Orlando
Join Date: Jul 2002
Posts: 159
My training has had many frequent ups and downs and some periods I would like to forget.

Interesting. Last night one of my senior students asked how I was doing and I said that I was currently going through a phase of only going through the motions. I had only just used him to demonstate some hard technique and he dutifully laughed and said the obvious things. I interupted him and told him I was serious, that I was not 'feeling' anything currently and going through the motions of Aikido. I felt it was okay for him to hear this, he is a sandan after all, but I could tell it disturbed him.

I went on to say that I knew that it was only a phase and that it meant something was happening in me, on my way to a new learning experience. He mentioned that it might be the season, or that I was emptying the mind for Shihan training next month with Saotome Sensei. I don't know, but it is a real void. A sense of emptyness and lack of caring that is quite disturbing brings a certain introspection that is always good, but it can't be denied.

Opher, this has happened to me regularly. Let me think about this some more before I get into a decent retrospective.

Daniel G. Linden
Author of ON MASTERING AIKIDO (c) 2004
Founder Shoshin Aikido Dojos
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