Re: The uke/nage paradigm
Excuse me, but your description of ukemi at your old dojo is such a mix of things that make sense to me and things that don't that I wonder if you're describing it right.
In my view, if uke can get clobbered by nage he pretty much should be. The whole point of ukemi is to keep yourself safe even when nage's in control. Uke doesn't resist not because being flowing and weightless is the goal, but because nage can use uke's resistance against him. And "not resisting" doesn't mean being a noodle either, because then nage can take advantage of that and clobber you just the same. Even when a technique puts nage in a position where a strike is possible, the solution is usually flexible and fast ukemi to get out of the way.
(A while back, my sensei gave me homework because he said I was too stiff and unresponsive: grab nage's wrists in ryote-tori and let nage punch my head. My job was not to fight the punch but to flow with it into a fall so that no matter how fast it came in, it didn't hit me.)
I wonder also about the new dojo's ukemi. A committed attack is fine, but then you turn into a dead weight? Regardless of whether you're open or not?