Mary, not knowing the specific nature of a problem does not mean there isn't one. This person not only wants to leave the dojo, she says she might stop training altogether. That sounds to me like somebody wishing and acting to solve a problem. I've simply suggested that she try not to become jaded about aikido as a whole from this single experience, regardless of the foundation for it. I still think it's a valid suggestion. Perhaps if you re-read it without inferring prejudice on my part, you will see where I was going. I think the issue here is not whom to blame, but whether aikido is worth another try somewhere else. My apologies if I gave anyone the wrong impression.
I've got no beef with the course of action or with your suggestion. I just wonder if "problem" is the right way to frame it. Problem with the dojo? With this other person? With aikido? What "problem" do you perceive here, and why is it on OP to "solve" it?