The great thing is that I actually DO have a couple folk at home who can teach this very well. Now I just have to freaking learn from them. And, I have access to several other people who also have it.
I am learning that I dont have to throw the baby out with the bathwater. My experience with aikido so far leads well into what I am trying to learn now. I am having to reprogram some stuff, mostly "footwork" and entry angles. That's proving to be pretty tough, but I'm sure it will come along. Mostly, since I am learning new things, I am coming in way too big and missing the sweet spots. I've never been subtle. If a tack nailer will do nicely, I'm grabbing the sledge. Nobody can accuse me of having any sensitivity.
Maybe you have mentioned this before, but I'm wondering if there's an event behind your Aikido renaissance, so to speak? It looks like you've been around since 2004, but are now referring to reprogramming and worrying about having to abandon the whole project. Aikido schools, traditions, philosophies differ widely. Even the nomenclature is different. You've probably noticed how advice that's good for some may be terrible for others, depending on how they train.
Has something changed in your outlook? Switched dojos or styles recently?