You're at the same juncture that I was at 12 years ago. I realized that my Aikido was missing something and after 25 years with the same teacher I didn't think I was going to discover the missing component by continuing as before. I chose to pursue an independent course (a painful and scary decision) and discovered that what was missing was my ability to explore the ideas that were occurring within me that fell outside the accepted doctrine of my former organization.
That decision spurred a growth spurt in my Aikido that continues today. Good luck, there's a steep but worthwhile drop off the cliff you're standing on the edge of...
thanks for the encouragement by sharing your own experience. It does feel like I'm teetering on a cliff edge. I do not fear the drop, I guess my hesitation is in the style of dive I take as I throw myself over the edge.... ah metaphors where would we be without them?