In our training, we just ask each other "Are you happy?", then smile. When you smile (even when others are attacking you), everything else just comes into place naturally.
Koichi Tohei sensei's Ki principle #2: "Relax completely" means whatever you think you can rely on, your strength, your intelligence, your beauty, your pride, your knowledge, your money, your emotion, your fear, your... no matter what, just treat them like your junk mail, you throw them away.
Please refer to 5:18 of this video http://youtu.be/tivkVcKGlIM
by Dr David Shaner who was a former Uchideshi of Tohei sensei.