Re: Ironing a Hakama?
If the pleats aren't intact, you've got a job of work ahead of you -- but then, if the pleats aren't intact, you're probably not able to fold it, so let's assume that's not the case. My method is similar to Hugh's and Dan's: I generally wash it first, hang it to dry with a skirt hanger and pin the pleats while it's still damp, then iron in the same order I fold it (back first, inside to outside, making sure the outer seam lines up all the while.
Also, as Dan said, first you need to know how to iron. If you don't know how to iron, I'd try something other than a hakama to learn on. Start with a sheet (so you know how to get the proper setting and iron smoothly), then go on to dress shirts (do the sleeves first and the yoke and collar last), and when you're good at dress shirts, go on to a hakama.
If you're a complete babe in the woods, I guess you could try to get someone else to do it for you, but if you hope to be able to take care of your own things some day, I'd think at least you'd watch the process (and learn to iron, as noted above) in the interest of learning how to do it yourself.