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Old 10-18-2002, 09:48 AM   #35
opherdonchin
Dojo: Baltimore Aikido
Location: Baltimore
Join Date: Jul 2002
Posts: 586
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Quote:
if it's bad enough that all you can come up with is some self-invented lessons about patience and dealing with difficult people, is this really a good use of valuable training time?
Actually, I think that I learn something very different from people like this (assuming I have the right idea of what you mean in mind). I think that for me (and for many others) one of the most challenging aspects of AiKiDo is it's built in assumption that 'real' ukes will commit. In my imaginings about martial situations and in my day to day life, I find that this isn't really true, and that my partners don't necessarily commit and may only be peripherally engaged in the interaction we are having. I've seen plenty of examples, though, of senseis who know how to invite their uke in, to draw them in, so that real engagement develops and, thus, AiKiDo becomes possible.

So, when I face people like what you describe I ask myself whether I can draw them in (without pulling) and encourage them forward (without pushing). Usually, I can't. For me, it shows up the weaknesses in my AiKiDo just as surely as when I'm facing a 220 lb 6'4" behemoth who is giving me enough energy to make me cringe and cower.

And, of course, if we got to choose all of our lessons in life, life would be much eaiser. The point here is that this is a lesson you didn't get to choose. I don't know about you, but my experience says that the lessons I've learned the most from have been the ones I haven't chosen or would have chosen to avoid.

Yours in Aiki
Opher
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