View Single Post
Old 10-10-2012, 11:43 AM   #15
Conrad Gus
Conrad Gus's Avatar
Dojo: Victoria Family Aikido
Location: Victoria, BC
Join Date: Dec 2001
Posts: 268
Re: Who's missing out?

Graham Christian wrote: View Post
Hi Jun. Maybe the above answer clarifies or maybe it doesn't. The reason I don't is because it's not personal, it's not aimed at a particular person. If I look over posts and point out when this happens I'm sure I will then be accused of personal attack.

When those who wish to debate the matter can agree that it is not to do with charachter or personage and can accept how we as human beings can get over exuberant and present things in the way I describe then perhaps we can review our own posts to see when we do this.

Without this first step then pointing out who said what is off topic as far as I can see and counter productive.

Of course, on the other hand, if you see through your experience that this will not happen and will lead nowhere then it will be only right for you to end the thread. In this respect I bow to your wisdom.

I think there was something valuable in the original post. Rather than focussing on being critical of people who promote themselves, maybe you could discuss how to not feel threatened by someone else's self-promotion or difference of opinion? If the thought is re-framed in terms of one's own feelings and reactions rather than externally, it will be less likely to be perceived as an attack. This thread is actually an interesting example of how we (as human beings) manage to suck each other into conflict. It is a skill to be able to resist getting sucked into the conflict (one of the core skills of aikido, IMHO).

If you like, you could treat this thread as a first draft, and start a new thread with a different tone - one that makes a point without pushing buttons (intentionally or unintentionally). Forgive me if I am misunderstanding your original point but I think it's worth a do-over if you are still inclined.