Re: talking and listening
And on imposing...
My only point is that any time there is anything done, even if it is avoidance, you are shaping the situation. You are trying to change how things are going to go which in turn is taking control yourself. Even the person who tries all sorts of warm, fuzzy, even sweet talking approach to calm someone down is trying to assert some sort of control over the other person. We tend to use the word "imposing" to carry connotations of "taking over" in a sort of negative way. And often people like to say that this is a "bad" thing to do, it is about power, violence and control, etc. However, some of the most insidious examples of power grabs and controlling behavior I've seen has been by people who act like the noble person just trying to rise above the fray. Passive aggressive people who wear the garb of the peaceful, enlightened warrior who in the end are little more than potential cult figures. For them it is still about control. Imposing their will.
Whether this has anything to do with Aikido is another issue entirely. I just thought it was an interesting issue as people tend to use the terms with subtly different meanings depending on what they want to show.