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Old 08-28-2012, 08:44 AM   #57
lbb
Location: Massachusetts
Join Date: Jun 2006
Posts: 2,764
United_States
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Re: talking and listening

Keith, thank you for your thoughts. You said it so much better than I could have.

I liked the original post very much. For me, it was a reminder that if I can set assumptions aside, I can sometimes give myself more options. Broadening your mind, reserving judgment, listening instead of talking, is for your benefit.

And as far as the limits of parable...yes, that. The OP was not a statement that every situation is a "you want the skin, I want the juicy parts" situation, just a reminder to be open to where such situations exist. I think one reason why parables are useful is that we human beings particularize, and parables have the power to break us out of that rut. But if you've really got that particularization habit ingrained, you're going to try to particularize the parable as well.

A good article relating to this whole dynamic is here:

While he was making his points on stage, I was taking an inventory of the things I didn’t agree with. And when presented with an opportunity to speak with him, I quickly pushed back at some of his ideas. I must have seemed like such an asshole.

His response changed my life. It was a simple thing. He said “Man, give it five minutes.” I asked him what he meant by that? He said, it’s fine to disagree, it’s fine to push back, it’s great to have strong opinions and beliefs, but give my ideas some time to set in before you’re sure you want to argue against them. “Five minutes” represented “think”, not react. He was totally right.
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