Ah, Tom... so much you bring up in such a short post!
I agree with all you say. On kuzushi and Izanami - Izanagi, I have already written. See
To return to the subject of creation as destruction... I can agree in principle with those who say every act of creation requires the destruction of that which is. However, I think we play a dangerous semantic game when we universalize a word, such that it approaches the meaningless.
For example, I can accept that there can be a kind of annihilation of self in the act of making love. But this destruction is very different from the destruction of rape. Therefore we need different words to describe these two very different kinds of transformations.
Luckily we have them at our disposal. There are many different -struct words:
... and so on. These are all interrelated, and examining these relationships is interesting philosophically. Yet they are not semantically equivalent, and to treat them as such is to undermine the richness of language and thought.
This is why I prefer to speak of shifts in balance not necessitating breaks in balance. I think of making love as creative and rape as destructive. I look for changes that are transformative and possibly reconstructive without being destructive.
Should we then turn a blind eye to the elements of destruction that almost always accompany constructive acts? Of course not. But if we must "break some eggs to make an omelette," I hope it is understood that the act is one directed towards growth, sustenance, nourishment, health, and vitality. Those who use the saying to justify injustice or recklessness, are simply being disingenuous.
Glad you and the horse are still on good terms. I've been around the animals myself, and I understand how instructive such relationships can be.