This is killing me; I love the art, but the culture that accepts and enables this repels me. What would you do?
IMHO, the art does not accept and enable this.
The culture does not accept and enable this.
Being protective is better than wishing you has been.
I personally would not let my daughter train where I did not feel she was safe.
If I were the Sensei or Senpai in a school that allowed this - I would be upside his head and he'd be outside the doors.