Bryan Bateman wrote:
I believe that Aikido should be done with your uke, not to your uke.
I completley agree!
You are discussing one version of Modern Aikido spread by modern teachers. Many of the old guard Japanese Shihan were openly derisive of that idea; many times calling it nonsense and specifically stating that it was not aikido. It's in interview after interview. Morihei Ueshiba explicitly stated in no uncertain terms, that aiki allows you to exert your will on your opponent. And he also constantly talked about control.
You can have fun with that idea, many do. The important thing is to know the difference and make a healthy choice that you enjoy. Just be careful out there in doing too much cooperative work or when you meet people who may actually know how to exert their will on you and control your every effort, you will more than likely be unable to do anything about it.
You can always find a way to do both, many do that as well.