All sounds good except for one major difference. Aikido wasn't done for such purpose. Budo was now described as the budo of love. The purpose was now based on the spirit of loving protection.
How to do Kotegaishe for example in a way where you don't rip the tendons of the wrist of the aggressor is thus a change in technique application. The same goes for all the techniques. There's a way to do them in order to cause pain or dislocation etc. or there's the way of Aikido.
Do you have anything to support your notion that O'sensei felt that what he was doing was no longer about effectiveness?
How much first hand experience do you have with kotegaeshi from non-aikido sources?